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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 08/09/2013 5:54:39 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

We "Decimated" Al Qaeda

President Obama walks into a local bank in Chicago to cash a check. He is surrounded by Secret Service agents. As he approaches the cashier he says, "Good morning Ma'am, could you please cash this check for me?"

Cashier:"It would be my pleasure sir. Could you please show me your ID?"

Obama: "Truthfully, I did not bring my ID with me as I didn't think there was any need to. I am President Barack Obama, the President of the United States of AMERICA !!!!"

Cashier: "Yes sir, I know who you are, but with all the regulations and monitoring of the banks because of 9/11, impostors, forgers, money laundering, and bad mortgage underwriting not to mention requirements of the Dodd/Frank legislation, etc., I must insist on seeing ID."

Obama: “Just ask anyone here at the bank who I am and they will tell you. Everybody knows who I am."

Cashier: "I am sorry Mr. President but these are the bank rules and I must follow them."

Obama: "I am urging you, please, to cash this check. I need to buy a gift for Michelle for her next vacation"

Cashier: "Look Mr. President, here is an example of what we can do. One day, Tiger Woods came into one of our bank branches without ID. To prove he was Tiger Woods he pulled out his putter and made a beautiful shot across the bank into a coffee cup. With that shot we knew him to be Tiger Woods and cashed his check. Another time, Andre Agassi came into the same place without ID. He pulled out his tennis racquet and made a fabulous shot where as the tennis ball landed in a coffee cup. With that shot we cashed his check."

"So, Mr. President, what can you do to prove that it is you, and only you, as the President of the United States?"

Obama: Obama stands there thinking, and thinking, and finally says, "Honestly, my mind is a total blank...there is nothing that comes to my mind. I can't think of a single thing. I have absolutely no idea what to do and I don’t have a clue.”

Cashier: "Will that be large or small bills, Mr. President?

U.S. embassies are closed all around the Middle East this week due to a terrorist threat. What happened was the U.S. intercepted a conference call of 20 al-Qaida operatives. Twenty on one conference call! Who is their carrier? I go under a bridge and my cellphone drops the call, but they can get 20 people in one call from a cave? ~ Jay Leno



TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: ofst; security; silliness; weak
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To: Lucky9teen
Instead of 140 characters, Tweets would be limited to your IQ number

I ... uh ... ugh.

21 posted on 08/09/2013 6:44:24 AM PDT by Pan_Yan
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To: sodpoodle

Someone stole all the toilets from the police station. A spokesman for the police department says they have nothing to go on.


22 posted on 08/09/2013 6:45:53 AM PDT by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (The average American voter is an idiot. Which is how the Dems want it.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Happy Birthday to Me...

Now, on with the silliness! ;-P


23 posted on 08/09/2013 6:47:21 AM PDT by MortMan (Disarming the sheep only emboldens the wolves.)
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To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers

Good one;). I should have noted that my post was an email from a great friend who sends me terrific chain mails.


24 posted on 08/09/2013 6:52:47 AM PDT by sodpoodle (Life is prickly - carry tweezers.)
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To: MortMan; SoldierDad

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

Are you having birthday cake? Special dinner? Presents?

Have a great one!


25 posted on 08/09/2013 6:57:22 AM PDT by NEMDF
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To: Lucky9teen
I can't believe I forgat it's Friday.....I must be retired.

"That's retarded, sir..."

26 posted on 08/09/2013 6:57:45 AM PDT by ErnBatavia (Carlos Danger for mayor....NYC deserves him)
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To: NEMDF

Thanks! Birthday cake, and enjoying a new impact driver (gotta have toys)! Ham steaks on the grill and baked sweet potatoes - YUM!


27 posted on 08/09/2013 6:59:44 AM PDT by MortMan (Disarming the sheep only emboldens the wolves.)
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To: MortMan
Happy Birthday.

Beware of cake ninjas.


28 posted on 08/09/2013 7:06:09 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (America 2013 - STUCK ON STUPID)
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To: Pan_Yan
Send 'em up here to Minnesota. We'll take care of them...


29 posted on 08/09/2013 7:06:31 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (I will not comply.)
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To: MortMan
No really, beware.


30 posted on 08/09/2013 7:06:39 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (America 2013 - STUCK ON STUPID)
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To: MortMan
Just be safe.


31 posted on 08/09/2013 7:07:12 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (America 2013 - STUCK ON STUPID)
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To: ErnBatavia

I believe Jeantel the Hutt actually pronounces that “re TART ed”.


32 posted on 08/09/2013 7:42:07 AM PDT by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (The average American voter is an idiot. Which is how the Dems want it.)
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To: Lucky9teen
 photo u3_zps2bb5c5b0.jpg

 photo u2_zps0b039dee.jpg

 photo u1_zps8530538c.jpg

33 posted on 08/09/2013 7:47:53 AM PDT by CodeJockey (Freeper, Tea Party Member, Bitter Clinger, Creepy White Cracker)
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To: Lucky9teen

Fine thread!


34 posted on 08/09/2013 7:56:11 AM PDT by expat2
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To: Lucky9teen

35 posted on 08/09/2013 7:58:37 AM PDT by P.O.E. (Pray for America)
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To: Lucky9teen

36 posted on 08/09/2013 7:59:19 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: Dead Corpse

Dead Giveaway - Sarah’s Version http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pt5xcAUYJ0k&src_vid=nZcRU0Op5P4&feature=iv&annotation_id=annotation_880250


37 posted on 08/09/2013 8:00:19 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Yes!!! Thank you Lucky9teen for adding me to the ping list! Now I won’t ever forget or miss the Silliness thread.


38 posted on 08/09/2013 8:03:57 AM PDT by MWestMom (Psalms 109:8)
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To: Yorlik803

Cat-Friend vs Dog-Friend http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbycvPwr1Wg


39 posted on 08/09/2013 8:04:43 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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To: Currentriverrat

Do NOT try this at home http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ZzoB6xBWOI


40 posted on 08/09/2013 8:05:21 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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