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Premarital Sex, Cohabitation, and Divorce: The Broken Link
National Council on Family Relations ^ | May 2003 | National Council on Family Relations

Posted on 09/17/2010 1:34:15 PM PDT by MichiganConservative

The results presented in this article replicate findings from previous research: Women who cohabit prior to marriage or who have premarital sex have an increased likelihood of marital disruption. Considering the joint effects of premarital cohabitation and premarital sex, as well as histories of premarital relationships, extends previous research. The most salient finding from this analysis is that women whose intimate premarital relationships are limited to their husbands—either premarital sex alone or premarital cohabitation—do not experience an increased risk of divorce. It is only women who have more than one intimate premarital relationship who have an elevated risk of marital disruption. This effect is strongest for women who have multiple premarital coresidental unions. These findings are consistent with the notion that premarital sex and cohabitation have become part of the normal courtship pattern in the United States. They do not indicate selectivity on characteristics linked to the risk of divorce and do not provide couples with experiences that lessen the stability of marriage.


TOPICS: Health/Medicine; Hobbies; Miscellaneous; Society
KEYWORDS: cohabitation; divorce; moralabsolutes; sex; sluts
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To: allmendream
I think if we could just get government to stop rewarding immoral and incompetent behavior through welfare, that would go a long way.

Okay, you've persuaded me ;-). Since the imposition of costs would fall on more than just the male and female involved - people such as her parents - that would go a long way toward rebuilding a social consensus against promiscuity.

61 posted on 09/17/2010 5:20:11 PM PDT by Tax-chick ("A little plain food, and a philosophic temperament, are the only necessities of life."~W. Churchill)
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To: allmendream; Tax-chick

No fault divorce is involved, too. Used to be that the one who cheated in a divorce was responsible and did not get rewarded financially, or had to pay, or whatever.

Adultery used to be considered a Bad Thing.


62 posted on 09/17/2010 5:29:01 PM PDT by little jeremiah (Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.)
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To: Tax-chick
Her parents and his parents. I think too long people have had a ‘let the boys be boys’ attitude and left it up to girls to be the guardians of sexual morality.

I have been reading Edgar Rice Burroughs (writer of Tarzan, and John Carter of Mars). His heroic ideal includes devotion in love, in the face of tantalizing temptation; as well as a distinction between the love between two hearts and the lust between two bodies caught up in circumstance. The Outlaw of Torn, circa 1914, almost 100 years ago.

In the Godfather, DeNiro is shown the beautiful actress girlfriend of his friend up on stage, “Isn't she gorgeous?” he asks. “For you, she is pretty. For me, there is only my wife and child.”

We need a return to THAT as a masculine ideal (perhaps without the criminality, but examples are hard to come by!).

63 posted on 09/17/2010 5:29:32 PM PDT by allmendream (Income is EARNED not distributed. So how could it be re-distributed?)
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To: allmendream

I’m not surprised. This is what I’ve observed as well. It might seem unfair to the girls, but look at it from the other perspective.

Guys who keep to what Christ teaches find themselves shut out. That’s not a very good deal, is it?


64 posted on 09/17/2010 6:14:05 PM PDT by BenKenobi ("Henceforth I will call nothing else fair unless it be her gift to me")
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To: Tax-chick

Marriage changes passion.

Suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.


65 posted on 09/17/2010 6:55:38 PM PDT by B4Ranch (Conflict is inevitable; Combat is an option. Train for the fight.)
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To: little jeremiah

Oh, and this important one - I see this a lot on FR lately:

“If you practice or promote sexual virtue, you’re psychologically weird, a closet homosexual, a prude, old fashioned, and a member of the Taliban.”
____________________

You see this one “a lot” on FR..?

Sure, it’s here. We have our “Libertines” on FR. I would hope they would “see the light,” and turn around. But I don’t see this “a lot” thankfully. Maybe I don’t hang around the same threads you do though....


66 posted on 09/17/2010 6:56:33 PM PDT by patriot preacher
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To: Persevero

Sean Hannity, O’Reilly, Beck and others like them I consider to be entertainers. They work to increase the number of viewers. They sell themselves to the public. I don’t know if that makes them whores in their personal lives but professionally it certainly does.

Entertainers are people you enjoy watching, whores are the ones you don’t care for.


67 posted on 09/17/2010 7:02:08 PM PDT by B4Ranch (Conflict is inevitable; Combat is an option. Train for the fight.)
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To: AdmSmith; Arthur Wildfire! March; Berosus; bigheadfred; blueyon; Convert from ECUSA; dervish; ...
The most salient finding from this analysis is that women whose intimate premarital relationships are limited to their husbands -- either premarital sex alone or premarital cohabitation -- do not experience an increased risk of divorce.
Of course, a lot depends on whether the husband of such a woman remains faithful after marriage himself. Thanks MichiganConservative and grellis.


68 posted on 09/17/2010 7:05:50 PM PDT by SunkenCiv (Democratic Underground... matters are worse, as their latest fund drive has come up short...)
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To: yefragetuwrabrumuy

“They have to learn how to work together, play together, exercise together, communicate with each other, learn how the other gender functions as human beings, and talk about their dreams and ambitions.”

Good point.


69 posted on 09/17/2010 7:15:23 PM PDT by PrayAndVoteConservesInLibsOut
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To: PrayAndVoteConservesInLibsOut

“Commitment is what Transforms the promise into reality. It is the words that speak Boldly of your intentions. And the actions which speak Louder than the words. It is making the time When there is none. Coming through time After time after time, Year after year after year. Commitment is the stuff Character is made of; The power to change The face of things. It is the daily triumph Of integrity over skepticism. When I say I love you, I mean that I’m committed to working to love you even when it’s hard.”

Another good point.

Speak the truth in love. God’s ways are always the smartest choice even if we don’t understand. If we follow His ways it is the right and wisest choice.


70 posted on 09/17/2010 7:26:53 PM PDT by PrayAndVoteConservesInLibsOut
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To: patriot preacher

As a co-pinger of the Homosexual Agenda and Moral Absolutes ping lists, I see it a lot.

Yes indeed.


71 posted on 09/17/2010 7:31:11 PM PDT by little jeremiah (Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.)
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To: MamaDearest

OOPS...want to give credit to MamaDearest for this great post:

Commitment is what Transforms the promise into reality. It is the words that speak Boldly of your intentions. And the actions which speak Louder than the words. It is making the time When there is none. Coming through time After time after time, Year after year after year. Commitment is the stuff Character is made of; The power to change The face of things. It is the daily triumph Of integrity over skepticism. When I say I love you, I mean that I’m committed to working to love you even when it’s hard.


72 posted on 09/17/2010 7:31:40 PM PDT by PrayAndVoteConservesInLibsOut
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To: allmendream; Tax-chick

Modern American culture is more sexualized than almost any other.”

Ever been to Europe? It is far worse, which is not to say that it isn’t very bad here...


73 posted on 09/17/2010 9:23:36 PM PDT by achilles2000 ("I'll agree to save the whales as long as we can deport the liberals")
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To: Tax-chick

The point is wrong. The enumerated powers applies to the feds. All other powers are reserved to the states or the people. Laws against fornication are Constitutional - at least under the real Constitution, as opposed to the one leftist judges have manufactured.


74 posted on 09/17/2010 9:28:05 PM PDT by achilles2000 ("I'll agree to save the whales as long as we can deport the liberals")
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To: yefragetuwrabrumuy; Tax-chick
You speak great wisdom.

See Tax-chick for the other elements you are missing.

For my own two cents, the additional problems are the hypersexualization of the culture, from beer commercials to girls' clothes; the demeaning of the Father-figure; and the two-income family leading to a blurring of the gender roles *in the family*, and the ease of no-fault divorce.

All these together tend to remove the impetus for *raising children* in a marriage.

Which then has predictable consequences.

NO cheers, unfortunately.

75 posted on 09/17/2010 10:07:41 PM PDT by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change without notice.)
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To: achilles2000; allmendream

I don’t think either allmendream or I was commenting on the constitutionality of such laws, but rather the advisability. Allmendream brought up the principle of “less government,” and I agree with that principle. There are, of course, other reasonable viewpoints.


76 posted on 09/18/2010 4:49:07 AM PDT by Tax-chick ("A little plain food, and a philosophic temperament, are the only necessities of life."~W. Churchill)
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To: grey_whiskers; little jeremiah

No, it’s not a cheering picture. The situation is set up to result in unhappy married couples, unhappy divorced couples, and unhappy children who grow into unhappy adults. It takes a lot of effort and an understanding of bedrock principles to fight the current.


77 posted on 09/18/2010 4:52:31 AM PDT by Tax-chick ("A little plain food, and a philosophic temperament, are the only necessities of life."~W. Churchill)
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To: little jeremiah

Now a days, it is assumed you will live with several people before marriage. So much so, that to not do it means there is something wrong and your marriage will not last.

Can’t tell you how many times they have told me that.


78 posted on 09/18/2010 5:19:59 AM PDT by redgolum ("God is dead" -- Nietzsche. "Nietzsche is dead" -- God.)
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To: B4Ranch
Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.

Another way to say that is you're in bed with someone you can reasonably assume is involved with you as a person, rather than as a body part, and has a reasonable chance of working out the hazards of life with you and whatever children turn up.

I think that's a lot more *ahem* inspiring than being in bed with someone you're pretty sure doesn't give a flying freep if you're dead tomorrow, as long as he ejaculates tonight.

79 posted on 09/18/2010 5:20:59 AM PDT by Tax-chick ("A little plain food, and a philosophic temperament, are the only necessities of life."~W. Churchill)
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To: allmendream; Salvation
In the Godfather, DeNiro is shown the beautiful actress girlfriend of his friend up on stage, “Isn't she gorgeous?” he asks. “For you, she is pretty. For me, there is only my wife and child.”

I've never gotten around to watching "The Godfather" all the way through. I have to use the subtitles, because of Brando's mumbling ;-).

Another criminal example is Jesse James. He was a nutcase killer, but all accounts agree that after he met his wife (when she was 15 and he was 18, or something like that) he literally never looked at another woman as anything but a robbery target.

Salvation quoted someone who said, "Sexuality is not a 'thing,' it is a person: the person of your spouse." G.K. Chesterton, I suppose, would be an example who is not a famous criminal ;-).

80 posted on 09/18/2010 6:42:04 AM PDT by Tax-chick ("A little plain food, and a philosophic temperament, are the only necessities of life."~W. Churchill)
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