Posted on 02/19/2010 4:39:22 AM PST by Lucky9teen
Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in California has now identified with certainty the heaviest element known to science.
The new element, Pelosium (PL), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Pelosium is inert, and has no charge and no magnetism. Nevertheless, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Pelosium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.
Pelosium has a normal half-life of 2 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a biennial reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
Pelosium mass will increase over time, since each reorganization will promote many morons to become isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Pelosium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalyzed with money, Pelosium becomes Senatorium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Pelosium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
We've just heard that the Obama Administration will be honoring the 43rd President of the United States by naming the gap between the tectonic plates beneath Haiti after him.
The area will now officially be referred to as "Bush's Fault."
It's silly time!
Not the top ten today, but at least I’m here. Yea!!
LOL. Thank you.
Have a wonderful TGIF!
I have a feeling some of us paused a little too long on that video. lol
You just slowed my poor DSL connection back to stone tablet speed.
And that video is just wrongwrongwrongwrongwrong.
You for got that when Pelosium is around Obaminite it has a higher energy state and bounces up and down. It also causes a faster decay in the half life of Dumbactatiums.
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Evil squirrel wants his Nobel prize too!
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