Posted on 11/19/2009 12:40:47 AM PST by GOP_Raider
When you get right down to it, who doesn't love a good trophy? A trophy may end up becoming a thing of the past in most facets of human civilization, but there will always be a home for the physical manifestation of the internet meme "Pwn3d" in the great game of college football. In the professional game, there is really truly only one trophy that people really want and that has Vince Lombardi's name etched on it. But in the college game, there are trophies for nearly every type of game you can think of. Some contests have a bronze pig you can win. Others have things like eggs, barrels, axes and even boots that are available for the taking. Unfortunately, there wasn't one trophy for the three year run of dominance that was the GOP_Raider Era of my middle school's Geography Bee. I wanted there to be tangible proof once I have children that "your father was a geography juggernaut. He knew more about third world African countries than some people know about reality television programming".
Still other games, however, don't need a trophy because the seething cauldron of animosity between the two combatants more than makes up for it. Well, that and if you beat the other for a long enough amount of time, you can get a billboard to remind them of how long it's been since they last beat you. And so it is this, the mantle filling component of this beloved game, that we salute this 12th week of action. At last check, I don't think there's a trophy available for me to win, as the Foot in Mouth World Championship trophy currently belongs to Joe Biden. Let's get to the matchups.
Colorado vs. Oklahoma State (Tonight, 7:30 pm) Assume for a moment you're Dan Hawkins. Is now as good of a time as any to write your CU obituary? Where did it all go wrong for Coach Hawk? Was it his debut loss to Montana State a few years ago? Was it the fact he seemed a little to loyal to his son Cody at the QB position? Or perhaps it was the fact that he couldn't get the recruits that his predecessors were able to get? Either way, the Buffs will stagger into Stillwater with the very likely possibility that Poke QB Zac Robinson will play despite getting slobberknocked last week against Texas Tech. And just as you don't want to be the old guy at the club, you don't want this game to be the game that could knock you out of a possible at-large BCS bid.
Boise State vs. Utah State (Friday, 9:30 pm) It's kind of a shame that we really haven't been able to see what the Broncos are capable of doing outside of their week 1 domination of Oregon. Much of that could be their own doing as their current and future scheduling problems have been well documented. However, take a look at what BSU was able to do against a better than usual Idaho team last week and judge for yourself. This week, the Orange and Blue travel out to the Cache Valley and if you are ever in the neighborhood, you need to take a roadie out to Logan, Utah. E.L. (no relation to Mitt) Romney Stadium has some of the most incredible scenery out of any stadium you'll find in this half of the country. Trust me on this.
Minnesota vs. Iowa (High Noon) The Gophers and the Hawkeyes play each year for perhaps the most unique traveling trophy in the game, the Floyd of Rosedale. Originally, a live pig was offered as a wager between the two state's governors, but since I'm pretty sure that neither sitting governor has much use for a live hog, a bronze manifestation of Floyd will have to do. Two players you'll probably want to keep an eye on for the Gophers will be the the QB/WR tandem of Adam Weber and Eric Decker. Or it would be if Decker were actually available. The real key here may be at the QB spot, as Ricky Stanzi is out until the Hawkeyes bowl game and that could limit the touches of what could possibly be the best TE in the entire country, Tony Moeaki.
Duke vs. Miami (High Noon) Given the circumstances, this hasn't been a bad season for the Canes. On the other hand, you Cane fans out there don't exactly tolerate seasons that "aren't bad". Unless you are the QB at the University of Iowa, throwing multiple interceptions won't get your team a whole lot of victories. With the final two games for the U coming up against the Blue Devils and South Florida, double digit wins are still very possible for the Hurricanes, and if you have some young talent which the Canes do appear to have, you can't go wrong with that. And look at the bright side: you don't have to play a bowl game in the warm December sunshine that is my current city of residence.
(for Bat_Chemist) Maryland vs. Florida State (High Noon) Here it is now for the Noles. A win here against the Terrapins and you're going to a bowl game. Which if you think about it, isn't this what you hoped to salvage out of the season if you're FSU? Several years ago, I was watching an ESPN interview with Coach Bowden and he mentioned that he "likes rings". You get rings for winning national titles, conference titles, bowl games, getting married, graduating from high school, there's even a trend out now called the Man-gagement ring, where guys that are engaged can get rings. Come on, really? If this becomes a bigger trend, I think I'll move out to Shoshoni, Wyoming and live off the land or something. By the way, if you ever are out in that part of the country, go out to Yellowstone Drug and have one of their malts. Few things are more awesome in life than going hunting when it's about 5 degrees outside than going into Yellowstone Drug and having an ice cold chocolate malt.
(and that may be my best stream of consciousness of the entire season. Remember where you were when you read that paragraph).
UT-Chattanooga vs. Alabama (12:21 pm)This is one of two games this week where one of the top two teams in all the land gets a scrimmage in before a huge rivalry game. We are fully aware of what the Crimson Tide are all about, but what about the Mocs of Chattanooga? UTC is known for having Business, Engineering, Nursing, English, Chemistry, Accounting, Psychology, and Education programs, so pretty much your standard undergrad stuff. However, the primary athletic notoriety of Chattanooga is that they are the college team of the one, the only...Terrell Owens. In lieu of any FReepmail some of you may want to send me, please forward all of your complaints, comments, and suggestions to the UT-Chattanooga athletic department concerning this matter. Thank you.
Florida International vs. Florida (12:21 pm) Let me ask our Florida Gators out there a simple question. Does Tim Tebow win the Heisman this year? More importantly, should he win the Heisman? I'm reasonably sure that the rest of the SEC is getting sick and tired of the remainder of the college football world sitting in awe of Tebow and waiting for him to turn water into beer (or failing that, water that will get you good and drunk). But could some mere mortal have been able to do what Tebow has done up to this point at Florida? Or perhaps alternatively, could Tebow have gone to another BCS school and had the same kind of success? Something to think about at the very least.
(for our FR TTU Contingent) Oklahoma vs. Texas Tech (12:30 pm) It's been a disappointing season for both the Sooners and the Red Raiders, but perhaps much moreso for OU. At the outset of the season, we thought that the Sooners had more than enough weaponry coupled with a good defense to get back to the national title game. After all, Sam Bradford was coming back and coming back, one would assume, to win a national championship. And then, he doesn't even play half a game. That's more playing time than injured TE Jermaine Gresham played, but I digress. As for the Red Raiders, the well oiled machine we saw last year is perhaps in need of a tune-up, after Taylor Potts being ineffective and Steven Sheffield got hurt. Tech head coach Mike Leach once said that "a pirate can beat a soldier", but could a pirate actually beat a Soooner?
TCU vs. Wyoming (2:00 pm) While under the intoxicating spell that is Pabst Blue Ribbon, I made a comment to a few of you on the list that the Frogs may be the best team in the country. And after what we all saw last Saturday, it's probably not hard to see why I would make that statement. The Frogs may not get the chance to prove that if Texas wins out and neither Florida nor Alabama have a hiccup leading up to the SEC Championship game, but I would assume that most of you would trust my judgment on things like this, copious amounts of PBR notwithstanding. That having been said, Laramie, Wyoming may have one of the most underrated home field advantages anywhere in the college game. It's cold, you're at 7,220 feet above sea level and odds are the wind will be blowing in ways you didn't think it was possible for wind to blow. The Pokes have a lot riding on this one themselves, as a come from behind victory last week against San Diego State kept the Cowboy bowl hopes alive. The guy to watch out for this week is Wyoming QB Austyn Carta-Samuels, who may be end up as the best QB in this the post-Josh Wallwork era of Cowboy football (although one could make a pretty good case for that of Randy Welniak as being the best QB out of any of them).
(for Biggirl and Man50D) UConn vs. Notre Dame (2:30 pm) The last man I would want to be right now is Irish head coach Charlie Weis. Let's say that the Huskies can find a way to beat ND. Is that the moment where you ask yourself what in the name of Pope Paul XI is going on in South Bend? Connecticut could use a win here, after the notable events of the current season. And to be perfectly honest, UConn probably has nothing to lose. They do need two more wins to become bowl eligible, but even with the problems the Irish have had, a win in the shadow of Touchdown Jesus would be a statement victory for the UConn program, and if nothing else would break that "they're just a basketball school" mold.
LSU vs. Ole Miss (3:30 pm) You may not be aware of this, but both the Rebels and the Bayou Bengals have a pretty heated rivalry. From my observation, LSU has quite a few rivalries which seems somewhat unusual. Must be some sort of backlash against cajuns, I don't know. But the Rebs are probably wondering how this season took the turn it did. They lose at South Carolina, get steamrolled by Alabama at home, and now Greg Hardy is out for the season. LSU could use a few things, chief among them a healthy Jordan Jefferson. While Jefferson is expected to play this week, I do have to wonder if you Tiger fans have that "oh Jeez, not this $#@$# again" .gif handy when you see Jarrett Lee roaming the sidelines getting ready to take the field.
Penn State vs. Michigan State (3:30 pm) This is the battle for the Land Grant Trophy, which if you take a look at it seems like it would be a sure "A" in just about any shop class. Seriously, what shop teacher wouldn't give that an A? It does turn out that PSU and MSU were two of the original land grant schools in America, hence the name of the trophy (which makes a lot more sense than my original assumption which was it devised as a way to make Penn State feel comfy when they originally joined the Big 10). Some may sit around thinking that 9-2 is a lackluster year for the Nittany Lions, but any time you have a chance to go for a 10 win (or more) season, it should put a smile on one's face (you would think). The Spartans got a shootout victory over Purdue last week to become bowl eligible, and for Sparty, taking home that totally awesome shop project back to East Lansing would be a nice consolation prize.
(for Palmetto) Virginia vs. Clemson (3:30 pm) Do any of you remember, or more accurately, try to forget the Tiger defeat back in October against Maryland? Take a look at what Clemson has done since that game: blew out Wake Forest, pulled out a huge win at Miami, have have taken Coastal Carolina, NC State, and Florida State to the woodshed. There was talk that head coach Dabo Swinney wasn't the right coach for the program, that the QB play and defense weren't going to perform well enough to get them to a bowl game, and various other wailing and gnashing of teeth. Now, all the Tigers need is a win this week against the Cavaliers and they'll get that rematch against Georgia Tech for the ACC title. If you're also the type that tends to be an independent thinking kind of guy or gal, you could probably still pencil in RB C.J. Spiller as a Heisman candidate, even though 97 yards and a score might not be enough to pad the resume.
(for kevkrom) Purdue vs. Indiana (3:30 pm) Here is another one of my favorite trophies featured in this the battle for the Old Oaken Bucket. During the 1920's, the Chicago chapters of both school's alumni associations got together and decided that the Hoosiers and Boilermakers should play for a really neat looking bucket. Both alums did this without saying to the other that they went to a clown college or that their respective rival frequently licks plate glass windows, as discourse wasn't as profane in the most recent century. It was two years ago that the Hoosiers took the Bucket on a last second field goal, and after some of the unlucky bounces that the Hoosiers have had this season, this would probably feel a whole lot better. However, it might be wise to keep in mind that the Boilermakers own nearly a 2-1 edge in the all-time series.
(for sean327) Colorado State vs. New Mexico (6:00 pm) When we're heading toward Thanksgiving and your team has yet to win a game, it's probably acceptable to look at the much maligned "moral victory" for consolation. After coming close enough to beat the Cobra Kai of the Mountain West last weekend, the Lobos have this weekend as their final opportunity to grab head coach Mike Locksley the first victory of his coaching career. The Rams are also limping into this contest, and it seemed to not be the team we saw that went into Boulder and beat Colorado to start off the season. CSU did nearly lose to Weber State at home a few weeks after that game, so I do suppose that there is some hope for UNM this go 'round.
Cal vs. Stanford (7:30 pm) Is there a team in the western 1/3rd of these kinda sorta United States that is playing better than the Cardinal right now? Beating Oregon in what might have been one of the bigger surprises of the season is one thing, but I did want to relay a comment a friend of mine made last Saturday when he said that "Stanford is probably the best team in the Pac-10". (Obviously I couldn't agree with that, since I still think that on paper it's still probably Oregon, the game between them notwithstanding). And then...there's Cal, whose bad season just got worse after Jahvid Best got hurt in a dramatic fashion. Would a win here by the Bears in the Big Game be enough to salvage the season for them?
Kansas vs. Texas (8:00 pm) You are looking for a game that the Longhorns might not have a chance to win before the Big XII Title game aren't you? Well, many of you are, but let's take a look at the Jayhawks. KU started off the year winning 5 in a row and then they marched into Boulder and lost to Colorado. It's sort of been downhill from there, with the Jayhawks most recent defeat against Nebraska where they couldn't seem to get out of their own way. Todd Reesing had a pretty decent game last week, throwing for 236 yards and a score, but I am pretty certain this isn't what the KU faithful signed up for when the season began. Stranger things have happened--I mean, America did elect as Chris Rock put it "a Kenyan, and you can't beat a Kenyan in a race"--but we may have to believe Kansas can play better when we see it.
Oregon vs. Arizona (8:00 pm) The great Sisyphean goal of the Arizona football program just took a roll down the hill last week against Cal. Praying to the Pac-10 football deity that this would finally be the year we see the U of A in Pasadena didn't quite work, and to make matters worse, the Ducks now have the inside track to the roses. The operative question in the Pac this year has to be "should we have seen this coming?" Oregon loses to Stanford after crushing USC, the Trojans we find out are now capable of having a rebuilding year, Cal can't seem to get over the hump, and the rest of the league is a bigger enigma than we were originally lead to believe. So it's probably just as well that we have for all intents and purposes a Pac-10 Championship game in Tucson, Arizona.
...and now, our Game of the Week.
Ohio State vs. Michigan (High Noon) Michigan and Ohio have been states long before people were saying things like "ah, getting around without horses, that idea will never fly!" They've also been hating each other long before the two institutions started playing this little game called football. What you have to keep in mind here is that a person like me could throw out at least 10 cliches when it comes to this rivalry and it would probably do it some justice. Not entirely, but at least you won't look like a complete idiot. For all intents and purposes though, the Buckeyes don't really need this game to do anything else of importance, like winning a Big 10 title or go to the Rose Bowl. But what would be a bigger source of pride in the Buckeye State than to keep the Wolverines mired in the funk in which they currently reside?
Enjoy your games this weekend.
Two comments:
1) That was fun to read! You’re a great writer.
2) TCU is not the #1 team in the country. TCU is pretty good, which for TCU is pretty good. Texas is awesome. It WOULD be fun to see them play head to head, like they used to every year.
HOOK ‘EM HORNS
Whether Tebow will win the Heisman or not, is really not important to me.
And as far as the rest of the SEC getting tired of Tebow, I think every bit of publicity the kid gets is good. He’s a true role model for younger fans (plus he has broken records...so you can’t call the publicity “hype”, it’s real.)
An interesting and very frustrating statistic about UConn. The team has lost all fives games in the last two minutes and by no more than two points. In other words they choke in the big games. Hopefully they can break that mindset against Notre Dame.
Whodathunk at this point in the season, Boise State would be playing a tougher team than Alabama and Florida were? Seriously, what is with these mid season non-conference games? I LIKE seeing SEC teams duking it out with each other and relying on the refs to make bad calls in the waning moments to keep ahold of their top 5 rankings.
Go Boise State and TCU! Break the BCS!
No recognition for the KSU-Nebraska game? They are playing for all the Big XII North marbles saturday(FWTW).
And KSU is playing for bowl eligibility still!
It is hard to believe that my Cowboys still have a shot at the BCS despite losing Dez and Kendall Hunter. Hopefully we can get by Colorado and then have things come down to the OU game. Unfortunately it is in Norman. It will give me the chance to get back at all of the OU fans in my life who always liked to ask, “Do you really want OSU to win? It will only hurt OU and not get anything for OSU.”
Hook’em Horns!
So it’s time for OSU to become 8-1 against Michigan......
ho-hum.......
yawnnnnnnnnnnnnn......
If it wasn’t for that loss at Purdue, what could have been......
Clever article, as always - LOVE the Perdue/Indiana barrel -
>> I think every bit of publicity the kid gets is good. Hes a true role model for younger fans
Colt McCoy (Texas QB) is similar. Unashamed Christian, leader, role model.
I have a ton of respect for Tim Tebow too.
This “off the field” aspect will be interesting if the two teams meet for the BCS championship, which looks likely. I can foresee this angle getting some well deserved and healthy press coverage.
NO!!! and here's why, The Heisman Jinx. In UF's last two championships, they beat the Heisman Winner (Troy Smith and Sam Bradford). And consider that the year Tim Tebow won it, is the ONLY year he didn't win a championship at UF. So I am firmly in the "Colt McCoy for Heisman" Camp.
Ping.
Guess the total number of points that UT-Chattanooga AND Florida International COMBINED score this Saturday..
Better hurry..only 10 single digits available..including ZERO..
1. Thanks, it makes doing these threads every week worthwhile.
2. It’s almost as though we could call ‘09 the Revenge of the Southwest Conference. Texas is still, well, Texas, TCU is still unbeaten, and even Houston and SMU have turned it around. It really is too bad that game won’t happen now.
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