[Joiseydude]

Bye

IBTZ

[cowboyway]

BAN!

[jennyjenny]

That’s dumb.

[La Lydia]

Where is “Me smacking my head and realizing I am an idiot, and am on the wrong forum”??

[Army Air Corps]

Put down the bong a slowly walk away.

[Billthedrill]

FR is First Life. And we play it for keeps. Welcome, n00b.

[Joe 6-pack]

You're not in Switzerland are you? Roman Polanski cruises for kids your age...watch your back.

Just sayin'....

[Gator113]

Do you like Gladiator movies?

IBTZ

[Drew68]

Glad to see I'm not the only one who plugs a Boss DS-1 into a Marshall stack.

[rabidralph]

I want to be on Tanquerey Island.

[Jaxter]

I’m more of a Les Paul kind of guy but hey, that’s just me. Welcome to Free Republic. Don’t forget to make a donation.

[death2tyrants]

Hey everyone! I have a screenshot of donkey kong. How do I put this in breaking news? /s

[Joiseydude]

You use the words 'me" and "I" allot.

Is that you Barry?

[DesertConservative]

SL looks so dated and low-rez.

[Bullish]

Take it to facebook, will ya?

[steveo]

YAY!

[Billthedrill]

Well, as long as this is one of those white space threads, I'd like to introduce you all to my Uncle Mortimer. Mort's a little hard of hearing these days due to a career as a human cannonball at one of those traveling gypsy circuses that goes from town to town in the Midwest, setting their tents on reclaimed land where the EPA won't let anyone grow anything because they figure even the little mole critters will grow a third eye and only be edible to other critters that are genetic mutants themselves, which may account for Uncle Mort's own unique physique but I'm getting ahead of myself. One day he eloped with the Bearded Lady but they couldn't afford a taxi so Mort and his fiancee double-charged the cannon, pointed it at Reno and stuffed themselves inside. Well, as fate would have it - that was out near the atomic test range so Reno wasn't all that far away but some of the toxic dump was probably material left over from those sheep that got killed after the Operation Knothole nuclear shot that they bulldozed under the sand and the lava rock and paid the farmer off before he grew a third eye, well anyway the cannon went off and away they went into their new life only they didn't quite make it to Reno because Mort miscalculated the charge. That kind of thing can happen when you're in love.

So there's Mort and the Bearded Lady hitchhiking through the wilds of Nevada where it never really gets dark because the ground glows kinda blue-like and up pulls a truck driver and he doffs his cap at the beloved and what do you know he has a third eye but it's a ride and so Mort and the Bearded Lady ended up in Tonopah which isn't quite Reno but then the driver had to turn off the road on one of those secret mission things that goes into the fenced-off land with the "deadly force authorized" signs and all the guards have third eyes. It's no place for newlyweds, nosirreebub.

Pretty soon the saucer flies overhead - did I mention there was a saucer well there was - and they look up and wave at the little guys inside with the flippers and the metal suits and the third eyes and Mort sez to the Bearded Lady "Hey, we never did settle on a honeymoon," but she sez she wasn't into the anal probe thing so they settled on Disneyland instead. So Uncle Mort got a job running the flying car ride at Tomorrowland and the Bearded Lady - that's my Aunt Mildred - landed a role in the Pirates of the Carribean diorama as the lady who was running in circles from a pirate only later they got politically correct and made her carry a turkey on a plate so everybody would think the pirate was hungry instead of horny well you know how the 90's were. But that's why my Cousin Hannah has tentacles. Well, that's what we think, anyway.

[RandallFlagg]

Where’s the zombies?

[B-Chan]

[kanawa]