~~~~ThE oFfIcIaL fRiDaY sIlLiNeSs ThReAd~~~~

[Lucky9teen]

Our President, Mr. Obama,
Governs with cool, never drama.
His sweet words can thrill,
But his policies kill.
Fine language won’t hide bloody trauma.


NATIONAL COMIC BOOK DAY

There once was a guy named Barack
Who loved to hear himself talk
He bought all the banks
Then wanted our thanks
Though he put all our children in hock



A mandate the Dems thought he’d get
More liberal than center, you bet
But we never knew
How badly He’d do
While piling up trillions in debt



Our president knows how to parse
Golden words into nebulous farce
But he makes the crowds swoon
And sing along with his tune
‘Cuz the media kisses his arse.



He promised us change and we got it
Though not quite the way that we thought it
To his left he owes debt
To his right, deep regret
And our kids will be broke cause we bought it.

[sunny48]

But he followed the pair to Pawtucket,
The man and the girl with the bucket;
And he said to the man,
He was welcome to Nan,
But as for the bucket, Pawtucket.

[sunny48]

Rush Limbaugh runs over Al Gore 4:26
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RsCkkvnfhQ

[sunny48]

Some time this year, we taxpayers will again receive an Economic Stimulus payment. This is a very exciting program. I’ll explain it using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China .
. If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.
. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India .
.. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,
Honduras and Guatemala .
. If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea .
. If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .
. If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to
management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

Instead, keep the money in America by:
1 spending it at yard sales, or
2 going to ball games, or
3 spending it on prostitutes, or
4 beer or
5 tattoos.

(These are the only American businesses still operating in the US .)

Conclusion:
Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day

[Pan_Yan]

The Owl and the Pussy-Cat
(as retold by Pan_Yan)

The (Ass) and the (RINO) went to sea
In a beautiful pea-green boat:
They took some honey,
and plenty of (campaign) money
Wrapped up in a (501 c3) note.

The (Ass) looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
“O lovely Pussy, O Pussy, my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are!”

(RINO) said to the (Ass), “You elegant (Marxist),
How charmingly sweet you sing!
Oh! let us be married;
too long we have tarried:
But what shall we do for a ring?”
They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the bong-tree grows;
And there in a wood a (Community Organizer) stood,
With a ring at the end of his nose,
His nose,
His nose,
With (coke residue under) his nose.

“Dear (Community Organizer) , are you willing to sell for (ten trillion dollars)
Your ring?” Said the (Community Organizer), “I will.”
So they took it away, and were married next day
By the (Soros) who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a (tax subsidized) spoon;

And hand in hand on the (senate floor)
They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.

[fredhead]

Let’s hope I don’t get in trouble....

There once was a hermit named Dave
Who kept a dead whore in his cave
He wouldn’t admit
That she stunk like s###
He thought of the money he’d save.

Cleanest limerick I know.

[Sparko]

That’s a fabulous keeper.

I like the (tasteful) use of the parentheses.
(Seriously!)

[a fool in paradise]

"SHOW ME THE SILLY, BABY! SHOW ME THE SILLY!!!"

[Pharmboy]

LOL!! It's been a while since I heard that song, and am glad to see SOMEone out there is paying attention to the important stuff.

Thanks for setting this lyric right...

[a fool in paradise]

There once were some united nations,
Lousy tyrants they cheered with ovations.
Our President spoke.
“Our nation is broke...”
They erupted in jubilations.

[ShadowAce]

Protect your chicken from Dokken

[Lucky9teen]

We have in our midst an evil leader
Who appears to be just a good reader
His mouth full of lies
An administration of spies
He’s causing our country to teeter

[Mind Freed]

I don't want to be the only party pooper on here, but can this be the last Friday Silliness with the poems. They got a little out of hand. I look forward to the silliness thread all week and I was a little disappointed with the content this week... That being said, the Freepers definitely have some talent for doing those poems.

Okay... I'm going to go find a prostitute to take to a baseball game.

[copaliscrossing]

On a tombstone:

Here lies the body of Lester Moore
Took two shots from a .44
No Les
No More

[Lucky9teen]

Corruption in every branch
Makes most Americans quite blanch
But because they’re so swift
It’s actually a gift
We’re waking and taking a stanch

[Lucky9teen]

Party pooper you are that’s true
Your insistence of poems to be through
Silliness you crave
While you are quite brave
What do you think this is, the zoo?

[Pan_Yan]

Mind Freed thinks we are crass
and our poems are lacking in class
but his date is tattooed
and more than a flooz'
so pay her or she'll kick your ...

[april15Bendovr]

[Yorlik803]

There was was a man from Australia
who painted his ass like a Dahlia
The paint was real fine
likewise the design
But the aroma, there was a failure...
Breaker Morant...

[Cyber Ninja]

This Prez is a pitiful liar
Truth? He won’t even try her
The special place in hell
Very soon he will dwell
So, I’ll wait for his funeral pyre

[DoorGunner]

>>”?”

If I think of an answer, I’ll mail ya.