Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Middle-aged dating and love of coupons
http://www.postindependent.com/ ^ | Friday, April 24, 2009 | Heidi Rice

Posted on 04/25/2009 9:47:01 AM PDT by chasio649

“Honey, do you remember our first date?” I asked Husband-Head after hanging up the phone with my old high school girlfriend from California. “What did we do and how did we meet?”

Husband-Head was sitting on the couch and it was clear that there couldn’t be a subject he was less interested in than that of reminiscing about our dating days nearly 20 years ago.

Why is it that we girls want to remember every detailed minute, yet the actual wedding date seems to be a painful memory for the men?

From what I recall, the first time I met Husband-Head, I was tending bar at a local well-known watering hole, and he and 20 of his closest friends had come in to celebrate his birthday. Each one of his so-called “buddies” had ordered him a shot of liquor and — even though this was prior to the stringent liquor laws about overserving a patron — I knew that it was not a good idea. “Ummm ... dude ... you’re gonna die if you drink all these,” I warned him as I looked at all the shot glasses lined up on the bar.

“Then go out with me,” he bargained, as he started to drink the shots.

Not wanting him to die on my shift, I agreed to meet him the next night, pretty sure that there was no way he would ever remember the date.

I was wrong.

He didn’t die, but he did show up for our date.

And we ended up getting married — not until three years later, of course — but we’ve lived happily ever after since then.

All that came back to me the other weekend when my best friend from high school in California called me to give an update on her latest dating debacle.

Dana is a single, slim, smart and stylish woman, but for some reason she’s been single all of her life. She’s tried her hand several times at the online dating services, but so far has not had much luck with the men she’s met.

We talk on the phone almost every Friday night to share the events of our week and what’s been happening in our lives.

On this particular evening, Dana was relating a recent date she’d been on with a guy she’d met on one of the online dating services. The man claimed to be a 54-year-old medical doctor.

After chatting for a while, they agreed to meet for dinner at an Outback Steakhouse restaurant. “That’s not bad,” I said, trying to be encouraging. “I hear they have great steak and pasta.”

“I don’t even LIKE pasta!” Dana pointed out.

For me, it would be all about the food, but obviously this isn’t the main course in the dating world.

“And then he had a friggin’ coupon for the blooming onion appetizer,” Dana lamented.

I found this to be kind of funny, and I laughed.

You don’t like onions, nor do you want to kiss someone after eating them?

“Then, at the end of the dinner, he pulled out a gift certificate to pay for it all,” she continued. “And this guy is supposed to be a DOCTOR!”

Hmmm ... perhaps the economy is bad even for physicians.

I put my hand over the mouthpiece of the phone so she couldn’t hear me laughing. ...

Nevertheless, Dana relayed that she continued to give him a chance and accepted an invitation to go to his apartment for a cocktail afterwards. Which, surprisingly, did not go well.

“I am not going to date a guy who drives a crappier car than I do and lives in a crappier apartment than I do,” she reported indignantly. “It was gross!”

At this point, I had my hand over my mouth and was trying not to snot in my palm...

I didn’t even venture to ask if there had been any intimacy involved and what it was like...

“And furthermore, he had a flag draped over his bed,” she continued, answering my unasked question. “And he’s not even a veteran — he’s an idiot! I am SO done with dating!”

I wanted to console her by relaying all the idiots I’d dated — and kissed — in my younger years, but I didn’t think it would make her feel better.

When you’re dating in your middle-aged years, you think you know better by now and have learned from past mistakes.

HA!

Guess what...you’re pretty much just as stupid as you were when you were 25.

I looked at Husband-Head with new eyes after Dana and I got off the phone.

“Honey, let’s go out to Red Lobster for a romantic dinner this weekend,” I suggested. “I think I have a coupon...”


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: dating; singles
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-6061-80 last
To: Tax-chick

I thought you were already married?


61 posted on 04/25/2009 2:19:53 PM PDT by ReneeLynn (Socialism, it's the new black.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 58 | View Replies]

To: ReneeLynn

I am. It didn’t occur to me before I was married, and it doesn’t now. Of course, I don’t go out with men, other than my husband or sons, but my prayer group took me out to lunch earlier this week, and I didn’t notice whether anyone used a coupon or gift certificate.


62 posted on 04/25/2009 2:29:55 PM PDT by Tax-chick (O hai. Do I need you for something right now?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 61 | View Replies]

To: Tax-chick
Ann Coulter is single in her late 40’s, for some reason ...

Because I'm taken. :-)

Cheers!

63 posted on 04/25/2009 4:55:13 PM PDT by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change without notice.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 26 | View Replies]

To: Tax-chick

Well, you’re pretty much stuck if your husband does use coupons, aren’t you? After marriage coupons are fine.

Prayer group outing is not the same as a date. I don’t know why this seems to be sticking in your craw. I guess if you ever get single again, you could relate better to this woman. But certainly not now.


64 posted on 04/25/2009 9:07:34 PM PDT by ReneeLynn (Socialism, it's the new black.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 62 | View Replies]

To: ryan71; boxerblues; Hammy; Petruchio; Phinanceguy; DollyCali; Yorlik803; ...


65 posted on 04/25/2009 9:12:42 PM PDT by RandallFlagg (Satisfaction was my sin)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ReneeLynn

I think the story is fiction, anyway.


66 posted on 04/26/2009 4:56:04 AM PDT by Tax-chick (O hai. Do I need you for something right now?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 64 | View Replies]

To: grey_whiskers

That’s as good a reason as any! Cheers back!


67 posted on 04/26/2009 4:56:29 AM PDT by Tax-chick (O hai. Do I need you for something right now?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 63 | View Replies]

To: chasio649

A doctor? Crappy car? Crappy apartment? Gift certificate?

I wonder if he was testing her?

If I was very wealthy, I’d rent a lesser apartment, drive a lesser car, date women and see which ones were genuine and which ones were superficial.


68 posted on 04/26/2009 5:54:51 AM PDT by ryan71 (Time to buy guns and ammo, People.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: kabumpo
I don’t want to be on an equal footing, because I consider the woman to be superior.

In what way?

69 posted on 04/26/2009 6:20:00 AM PDT by Ray54
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 60 | View Replies]

To: Ray54

In courtship, the man venerates the woman.


70 posted on 04/26/2009 9:04:14 AM PDT by kabumpo (Kabumpo)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 69 | View Replies]

To: chasio649

Dave Ramsey pickup lines for 2009

You look familiar ... didn’t I deliver a pizza to you last week?

You’re so hot you could melt my debt snowball.

Good thing I have identity theft insurance, because you stole my heart!

Call me your mutual fund, honey ... ‘cause with you, I’m showing interest.

Are you unpaid credit card debt? Because you have got FINE written all over you!

If you turn me down, my life will look like a country song.

When I saw you, my jaw dropped like the value of a new car.

You should be my retirement plan ... you’d put the “OK” in my 401k.
*****************

I love these. I suppose I wouldn’t qualify for Dana.


71 posted on 04/27/2009 9:40:28 AM PDT by CSM (Smokers, the most patriotic of Americans!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: chasio649

And last years:

still have money in my “restaurant” envelope ... can I buy you dinner?

Would you like to dance? I’d love to show you my Baby Steps.

Why am I nervous about talking to you? Because you’re better than I deserve.

Allow me to introduce myself ... I am “borrower”, and you must be “lender”.

Good thing I got just term life insurance ... because I saw you and my heart stopped!

You can’t spell Financial Peace University without U and I.

I’ve already kicked Sallie Mae out. Want to take her place?

I just bought a bass boat with cash ... and it’s a good thing, because you’re quite a catch!

I’m not mortgage interest baby ... don’t write me off.

The good news? I’m debt free. The better news? I’m also date free.

What would you say if I asked you out? (response: no). That’s not good enough

Courtesy of one of Dave’s listeners On a scale of 350-850, I’m a Zero!


72 posted on 04/27/2009 9:41:23 AM PDT by CSM (Smokers, the most patriotic of Americans!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ReneeLynn
I never did go, "on the cheap", but I also never went on a first date for a meal in a restaurant either.

First dates are not to impress, at least in my opinion. First dates are to get to know each other.

I would ask a first date to go hiking, or to go watch a balloon race, or, on occasion, to the shooting range.

My wife and I's first date was to make American chili.
We met in the Philippines, she is a Philippina, and she had never had American chili and wanted to know what it was like.

But a meal in a restaurant? It is to laugh.

73 posted on 04/27/2009 9:53:45 AM PDT by Just another Joe (Warning: FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 20 | View Replies]

To: Caramelgal
A first date is all about making good first impressions, much like a job interview in some respects.

A good first impression, yes. To impress, no.

74 posted on 04/27/2009 9:54:40 AM PDT by Just another Joe (Warning: FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 51 | View Replies]

To: Just another Joe

You’re lucky to have had such a casual setting to meet your wife. We should all be able to meet that way, but a meal is usually the way on a date. I’m saying don’t be a cheap*ss and use a coupon on the first date if a ‘meal’ is involved. It’s not brain surgery. You can get cheap after the wedding. :)


75 posted on 04/27/2009 10:10:36 AM PDT by ReneeLynn (Socialism, it's the new black.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 73 | View Replies]

To: ReneeLynn
You’re lucky to have had such a casual setting to meet your wife. We should all be able to meet that way, but a meal is usually the way on a date.

My wife wasn't the first woman I ever went on a date with.

I NEVER took a FIRST date to a meal in a restaurant.
Second date and on, perhaps.
First date, NEVER.

I understand that a "meal" is normal as a first date but I decided long ago that I would never take a first date to a restaurant for a meal. I AM cheap and wouldn't want to spend the money to try to impress a woman that I didn't know if I wanted to take the time to get to know.

If money was an issue on the first date, the woman probably wouldn't have wanted anything to do with me anyway.

76 posted on 04/27/2009 10:33:52 AM PDT by Just another Joe (Warning: FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 75 | View Replies]

To: Just another Joe

Well, there are some women who do not want a cheap man. I don’t consider it a virtue anymore than I consider people who drive hybrid cars as virtuous. There’s nothing wrong with a woman looking for a successful spouse. Most men have levels of acceptability on a woman’s appearance, I don’t fault this woman or call her a golddigger or whore if she has an level of acceptability on a man’s spending habits. It’s her preference. So what?


77 posted on 04/27/2009 10:51:17 AM PDT by ReneeLynn (Socialism, it's the new black.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 76 | View Replies]

To: ReneeLynn
Well, there are some women who do not want a cheap man.

When I say cheap it is in the meaning of, When you buy something, buy quality. That way you only cry once.

That carried over into other areas of my life, as in looking for a spouse.

It seems to have worked as I am going on 26 years of marriage and 28 years together with my love.

78 posted on 04/27/2009 10:53:44 AM PDT by Just another Joe (Warning: FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 77 | View Replies]

To: kabumpo

“I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal - high enough so you can look up her dress”. - Steve Martin


79 posted on 04/27/2009 10:56:52 AM PDT by dfwgator (1996 2006 2008 - Good Things Come in Threes)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 70 | View Replies]

To: Just another Joe

Dang, you and I are just way to similar. My favorite first date is horseback riding. It tells me a lot about a person when they are around animals.


80 posted on 04/27/2009 1:30:16 PM PDT by CSM (Smokers, the most patriotic of Americans!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 73 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-6061-80 last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson