$$$$ThE oFfIcIaL fRiDaY sIlLiNeSs ThReAd$$$$

[Lucky9teen]

Today is "No Brainer Day" - now this day is for me!

By definition, a "No brainer" is doing something that is simple, easy, obvious, and/or totally logical, ya know, the TOTAL OPPOSITE of what our government is doing?



Therefore, today is the day for you to do all those "no brainer" tasks and activities. If a project requires thinking, study, or analysis of any kind, then its not the chore to do today.



Some people think that Christmas should be every day of the year. They even sing that theme in popular holiday songs. But, I think that No Brainer Day should be every day of the year.



I think you'll quickly get the hang of the concept of the day. And, I'm certain you will excel at No Brainer Day!

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

DENNY'S BREAKFAST SPECIAL

Denny's is offering a new breakfast special called the "Nadya Suleman" (mother of octuplets). You get fourteen eggs, no sausage and the guy next to you has to pay the bill.

I hate what this woman has done, but I couldn't help but laugh.

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[Bassfire]

Friday! time to party.

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[PERKY2004]

[Bassfire]

[PERKY2004]

You Are 75% Left Brained, 25% Right Brained

The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning.
Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others.
If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic.
Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet.

The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility.
Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way.
If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art.
Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.

Are You Right or Left Brained?

[fredhead]

Little Johnny... at it again.

---

Little Johnny’s neighbors had a baby. Unfortunately,
the baby was born without ears.

When the Mother and new baby came home from the
hospital, Johnny’s family was invited over to see the
baby.

Before they left their house, Little Johnny’s dad had
a talk with him and explained that the baby had no
ears. His dad also told him that if he so much as
mentioned anything about the baby’s missing ears or
even said the word “ears” he would get the spanking of
his life when they came back home. Little Johnny told
his dad he understood completely.

When Johnny looked in the crib he said, “What a
beautiful baby.”

The mother said, “Why, thank you, Little Johnny.”

Johnny said, “He has beautiful little feet and
beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really
beautiful eyes. Can he see?”

“Yes”, the Mother replied, “we are so thankful; the
Doctor said he will have 20/20 vision.”

“That’s great,” said Little Johnny, “cuz he’d be
outta luck if he needed glasses.”

[fredhead]

MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

NICKNAMES:

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
If Mike , Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT:

When the bill arrives, Mike , Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY:

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.

BATHROOMS:

A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel ...
The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS:

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE:

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS:

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE:

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

DRESSING UP:

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL:

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING:

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing!

[a fool in paradise]

Look for some of the Stag Beer ads featuring Mr. Magoo!

Also there are Welches Wine ads with the Flintstones (and Flintstones cigarette ads for Winston too!)

[fredhead]

You know your are living in 2009 when:

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don’t have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile : )

12. You’re reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn’t a #9 on this list.