HELP! How do you get a newborn to sleep through the night?

me | 2-12-09 | self

[Marie]

I have a friend with a 2 week old newborn who's starting to loose it. Hubby is in Iraq and the baby is waking up every two hours all night long.

I know there are strategies to help babies, even as little as this one, to start sleeping for 4 or 6 hours at night, but I don't know what they are. (I failed miserably at this with my own kids and my daughter woke up every two hours until she was 15 months old.)

I remember FReepers giving good advice on this issue a few years ago and hope some of you can help now.

Also, any recommended books out there?

Thanks!

[RushIsMyTeddyBear]

I used to give mine a bath with a little lavender and chamomile in the water right before bed. Then a feed and change. Make sure the baby is staying warm enough.

The ONE THING that got me though was a STRICT SCHEDULE. Everything by the hour. It kept me and the babies happier. Stick with it! If baby needs a nap when you’re out shopping.....go home right then.

I sure do feel for ya’! My younger child had colic for 10 weeks and cried ALL the time. I started smoking again during that period! LOL!

[Domandred]

Furber method. Works awesome. Two weeks old might be too early though. My wife and I started at about two months I think it was, first week was rough but after that zzzzzzzzz.

Now Kate sleeps most nights all the way through no problems. About once a week she’ll wake up at 1 am, but it’s with diaper issues. Once changed she goes right back to sleep.

Make sure all needs are taken care of. (food, diaper, some night time hugs and kisses). Bed time is always the same time, every night. Now that Kate doing okay she gets an hour window depending on how she is acting, too early and she wakes up too soon, too late and she gets angry and won’t go to bed because she’s too tired to realize she’s tired.

Put baby to bed. When baby starts to cry set a timer for 5 minutes.

Let the baby cry. This is the hardest part....Cannot stress enough that this is the hardest part. It’s actually harder on the parents than the baby.

When 5 minutes is up if the baby is still crying go in and WITHOUT picking up baby check needs (diaper). Again without picking up baby tuck in, comfort a bit, let her know you’re still there.

Rinse and repeat first night. First, second, and third night are the hardest.

Second night go with 5 minutes first time. Then increase time to 10 minutes between checks.

Third night....Okay I lied this one is the hardest. First time 5 minutes, then 10, then 15. Stay at 15 minutes in between checks. Third night my wife and I were up ALL NIGHT LONG and basically had to support each other “don’t go in there”, “how much time left?”, “5 minutes”, “arg I’m going outside for a minute to relax”

Fourth night....5, 10, 15. Baby was asleep before the first 15 minutes was up.

Fifth night, baby asleep before 10 minutes timer.

Sixth night...baby went right to bed.

After that smooth sailing. Kate goes to bed in on hour window and wakes up at the same time every morning. If she wakes in the middle of the night for a diaper it’s almost always between 1am and 1:15am so can almost plan for it.

It is really harder on the parents than the babies. As long as actual needs are taken care of, and baby is safe then baby won’t get hurt or damaged.

[DAVEY CROCKETT]

Give it a bath before bedtime and that might be anywhere from 8.00 on however you want to sleep but close to the time you want to go to sleep.

I need to know how much it is eating,my bet is 2 oz at a time move it up to 4 oz. when it suck the bottle dry it is still hungry, make sure to feel it until it is full it will push the bottle out of it mouth where it is full and smile at you.

Make sure dipper is dry and put it to slept however it likes. 2 weeks old is not going to sleep through the whole night but some do (one of mind did the other one still keeps me awake at 28 years old)

Keep the baby entrained during the day lay it in the floor let it just look around or a swing, car set something like that. so it uses that energy during the day. Hold it all the time it wont spoil them and this will be that last chance you will ever get to.

Maybe you can get 4 hours now a normal baby only cry if it is wet or hungry, if stepping up the oz. of milk don't work call the doctor. My son has a 4 week old and they don't realize they live in the baby's world not the baby in there world LOL...They have been having the same problem and I WILL be going down there next week. LOL

[Domandred]

Two weeks old might be too early though.

Should have said WILL be too early, not might be. Two or three months is best you can do.

[earlJam]

[midwyf]

You are so right! It worked for me (along with the cereal I wasn’t supposed to give them), Mom barely has to wake up.

[philled]

Newborns have a stomach that isn’t much bigger than a stamp. They need food very often and crying means they are either hungry, dirty, or uncomfortable. Get a bassinette and keep baby in the bedroom. If the baby is close she won’t wake up as much going to feed her. The first couple months are rough- even with both parents present!

[GUNGAGALUNGA]

Bwahahahha.....They don’t. If it is a boy has he shot the stream of pee all the way and hit ya in the forehead. Wait till they vomit on you.

[knittnmom]

My daughter didn’t sleep through the night until she was over 2 years old. Fortunately, she was eventually satisfied to look at books instead of waking me up. We think that’s one reason she became an early - and avid - reader.

[truebluetexan]

Call her representative or senators and ask for a nanny.

[Tired of Taxes]

One more thought: Does she think her baby is colicky? My firstborn was extremely “colicky”. He would scream for hours. Not cry, but scream his lungs out. We thought he was in pain, that maybe something I ate was causing him pain.

But, then I read an article that colicky babies just have a demanding personality. Most people don’t believe that, and people have gotten angry with me for saying it. But, I doubt their babies screamed more than mine did, and I was able to correct the situation by following this article: It simply advised to try to give the baby exactly what he wants immediately. So, I’d watch him, and I didn’t even wait for him to cry. All he had to do was look like he was about to cry, and I’d pick him up and do something - nurse him or change his diaper or something. Within a week, he was “cured” completely.

[B-Chan]

LOL You are so right. Baby Chan peed on me in the delivery room (Nurse: “Yeah, they do that”), and has puked on me about 40,000 times. He even vomited in my mouth once. (I was on my back dangling him over my head right after he’d eaten, so I deserved it.)

Even so, I wouldn’t trade those days for anything. Next to God, my family means everything to me.

[DigitalVideoDude]

My experience with “Growing Kids God’s Way”....

Baby #1 - 18 brutal months before sleeping though the night. We had no clue what we were doing.

Baby #2 - We read and took classes at church on “Growing Kids God’s Way”. Kid was sleeping through the night at 4 weeks. Program based upon setting a firm schedule of wake-play-eat-sleep.

[B-Chan]

PS --

[SparkyBass]

‘zactly. We were lucky to start with the class on kid #1 so learning to set the eat/play/sleep schedule worked like a charm.

[The Enlightener]

Newborns have to be fed every 2 hours, it's just the way it is. Gradually as they get bigger it's increase to 3 then 4 hours, and eventually they'll sleep longer chunks of the night. The 4 hour mark is golden because it means you only have to get up once a night, but I don't think most babies get there until they are 3 to 4 months old. The baby also becomes more efficient at eating during this time, so instead of feeding them for 45 minutes as a newborn, a 4 month old can be fed in 20 minutes, which is much better. I don't think babies sleep 8 hours until they are almost 1--I remember the first time my daughter slept all night and I woke up in a panic thinking something must be wrong with her and frantically checking on her only to find out she was sleeping peacefully.

There are a couple of myths out there that are counter productive. Keeping a baby up during the day when it wants sleep will lead to over stimulation, which means that the baby will be harder to get to sleep, and will be likely to wake up screaming after short bursts of sleep. Trust me, if you want your baby to sleep longer during the night, you have to ensure the baby gets the right amount of naps during the day. As a father, I learned this one the hard way and even now, my two year old needs two naps a day or he'll come running over to our bedroom in the middle of the night crying.

I also don't recommend feeding the baby excessively before bedtime, as this leads to the baby crying because their tummy is too full. This can also lead to spit up, and once that happens, the baby will get cold and start crying, and you have to now change the baby and the sheets, which is much worse than just having to feed the baby, since now the baby will cry the whole time while you are changing everything, and it means you are up longer than you would have been otherwise, and you have to spend more time trying to calm the baby down.

[madison10]

Get someone to help share the work: friend, fellow-mom, relative, women from church...

[Tax-chick]

As others have said, this is what the vast majority of newborn babies are like. They are hungry. Get the mother some help: help with housework, help with other children if any, help with shopping, help with holding the baby so she can take a shower ...

There are a variety of thing to be done that *might* encourage the baby to sleep longer, including drugging it with rum and letting it cry for hours. However, these are not good for the baby. The mother needs support, period.

[GUNGAGALUNGA]

Greatest movie ever.

[Tired of Taxes]

As soon as I got the OK at the 4 month mark, I couldn’t wait to give them that rice cereal. ;-) Mine were always prone to allergies, though, so we had to be careful about anything other than breastmilk, even formula.

I had three hungry baby boys. (I prefer midwives, btw!) The first two were screamers. The third would sleep so much, and I couldn’t get him to nurse as often, so he had trouble gaining weight. I was wishing he was a screamer, too. ;-)