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****The Official Friday Silliness Thread****

Posted on 10/24/2008 6:19:27 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

The 10 Most Disappointing Treats for Trick-or-Treaters

On Halloween night, some houses struggle with the idea of candy. There are good houses, and there are bad houses. The best trick-or-treaters know to avoid the latter. At the food site Serious Eats, we all love Halloween, but wish certain homes would just stop handing out the classically bad "treats." They weren't good last year, the year before that, or now. Our own Erin Zimmer put together this list of our top 10 Halloween treats that nobody wants...

Toothbrushes

Dentists and orthodontists should not be allowed to celebrate Halloween if they're going to get all tooth doctory on us. Do not bring your work home with you, folks! We all have a personal responsibility to brush, and maybe some of us will forget, but your complimentary bristles on a stick (instead of a Snickers) will not help us remember. It will make us despise you and your trade.

Raisins

Little boxes of stuck-together shriveled globs are not what little kids schlep around the neighborhood for all night. When they say trick-or-treat, they want candy that will rot their teeth, not wrinkled grapes.  (Using an empty box as a kazoo-like instrument, though, is kinda fun.)

Candy Corn

The most polarizing candy of all. The fruitcake of Halloween; it just never goes away. If you love them, fine. But don't subject the rest of us haters to the sickeningly sweet triangle that tastes like neither candy nor corn.

Smarties and Necco Wafers

These chalky candies are supposedly "fruit-flavored," but no fruit I know tastes like dust -- and makes everything eaten after taste like dust, too.

Dum Dum Lollipops

Usually, foods on a stick are yummy (corn dogs, ice pops), but Dum Dums just can't be included on that list. Not even if they were breaded and deep-fried and served at a fair.

Apples

Long before "poisoned candy" scares, evil people were handing out apples instead of candy on Halloween. This disappointing "treat" is the main reason to avoid unwrapped food while trick-or-treating.

Tootsie Rolls

It looks like chocolate and sort of smells like chocolate, but the mini brown tubes are not real chocolate. They taste like watered-down chocolate, and have a chewy texture that will strip the fillings right off your molars.

Miscellaneous, Wrapped Hard Candies

Halloween is supposed to be a holiday for young people, not senior citizens who suck on hard candies all day. Something about the strawberry-shaped strawberries, gold-wrapped butterscotch, and peppermint feels past the expiration date. (These usually get set aside for Granny.)

Laffy Taffy

I do not laffy when I get these. I sobby. I get depressedy. Because it gets all stucky to my teethy and doesn't even taste that goody.

Anything Fun-Sized

Who started calling it this? Since when is one bite fun?! Give us the rich houses with the sprawling driveways and full-sized candy bars any day. Portion control doesn't need to start this young.



TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: candy; halloween; ofst; silliness
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To: Cyber Liberty
That can be a crown-grabber....

From experience,no doubt. :)

81 posted on 10/24/2008 9:58:56 AM PDT by TexasCajun
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To: TexasCajun

Most of Day 1 is spent trying to get the wrapper off the darned thing.


82 posted on 10/24/2008 10:02:09 AM PDT by CougarGA7 (Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.)
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To: Lucky9teen
PhotobucketPhotobucket
83 posted on 10/24/2008 10:04:53 AM PDT by dragonblustar (Once abolish the God, and the government becomes the God - G. K. Chesterton)
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To: Darksheare

Don’t know. I’m pretty worried about him!


84 posted on 10/24/2008 10:06:01 AM PDT by MeekMom (http://tinyurl.com/4ssjvn)
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To: Lucky9teen

85 posted on 10/24/2008 10:06:23 AM PDT by JRios1968 (Sarah Palin smash Hulk!)
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To: B-Chan

Best halloween costume you Ever had:

I was in a college/career Sunday school class in Covina, CA in the early 80s and my younger sister, myself and another girlfriend of ours decided to dress up together as the 3 musketeers. Only we didn’t just start on Halloween, we decided 2 months earlier that we would make our costumes (mostly me), had the plume hats, the tunics and flaired shirts, the long gloves (made them with leather attachments, same as the boot extensions), and got plastic swords, etc. Then, we would go out every Saturday night (because it was just before Sunday morning church) and leave 1 rose and a note from “the musketeers” on 4 or 5 cars or doorsteps of Sunday school friends that were regulars. Well, by the time Halloween came around we had “struck” just about everyone in the class(being around 60-75 people), including ourselves, so the buzz was about who the Musketeers would be. So, on Halloween night at our church party, we 3 show up late (on purpose) and we were nearly mauled upon entering the house! Needless to say we won “Most Creative Costumes” and THAT was the best time we ever had for Halloween! I only wish I had photos of us in those costumes...


86 posted on 10/24/2008 10:06:51 AM PDT by princess leah
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To: rfreedom4u
Yes, lets redistribute, especially if there's some of this in there...

87 posted on 10/24/2008 10:08:58 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.)
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To: girlscout
Yeh, I got a lot of these too (and so did my kids last year, even)...

88 posted on 10/24/2008 10:11:00 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.)
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To: synbad600

89 posted on 10/24/2008 10:14:52 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.)
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To: CSM
Here's something really silly


90 posted on 10/24/2008 10:16:10 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.)
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To: Arrowhead1952

Aha, I removed the space between img src. Thanks for your help.


91 posted on 10/24/2008 10:17:34 AM PDT by CSM (I see this election as a referendum on the stupidity of the American people" (Henkster))
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To: MeekMom

No. Tomkow6 is MIA! :(


92 posted on 10/24/2008 10:18:04 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.)
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To: girlscout
Here's my all occasion card I'm sending this year....

Photobucket

93 posted on 10/24/2008 10:19:32 AM PDT by Snurple (VEGETARIAN, OLD INDIAN WORD FOR BAD HUNTER.)
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To: synbad600

94 posted on 10/24/2008 10:26:33 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.)
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To: Lucky9teen

One Question IQ Test

Here’s a one-question IQ Test to help you decide how you should
spend the rest of your day......

There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush.

By imitating the action of brushing one’s teeth, he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.

Now, if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses,
how should he express himself?

Think about it first before scrolling down for the answer...

He opens his mouth and says. ‘I would like to buy a pair of Sunglasses.’ If you got this wrong, please turn off your computer and call it a day.

I’ve got mine shutting down right now.


95 posted on 10/24/2008 10:39:25 AM PDT by DieNarrin
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To: princess leah
Speaking of creative costumes...

StickMen Costumes (on AFV)

This is my brother...

96 posted on 10/24/2008 10:42:14 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.)
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To: Lucky9teen; MeekMom; tomkow6

I just emailed Tom and let him know he had made the wanted list.


97 posted on 10/24/2008 10:51:24 AM PDT by acad1228 (McCain/Palin!!!!)
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To: girlscout
Did you ever get any of these in your trick or treat bag?

I did, back when I was young and stupid and ran around the neighborhood with one of those 1/2 pint milk cartons collecting for UNICEF.

I'm so ashamed. Please don't ban me.

98 posted on 10/24/2008 10:52:43 AM PDT by upchuck (Law of Logical Argument: Anything's possible if you don't know what you're talking about. => nObama))
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To: Lucky9teen
I just discovered the pleasures of "flavored" candy corn! In particular, the "caramel apple" flavored candy corn!

Mark

99 posted on 10/24/2008 10:53:14 AM PDT by MarkL (Al Gore: The Greenhouse Gasbag! (heard on Bob Brinker's Money Talk))
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To: princess leah

We had a young marrieds SS class fall festival dress up party and my wife and I dressed up as Hershey Candy Kisses. I had the gold foil and my wife had the silver foil.

Some “got it” and others had to have it explained to them.


100 posted on 10/24/2008 10:58:35 AM PDT by copaliscrossing (If stupidity were barrels of oil, we should start drilling the liberals heads right now!!!)
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