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What’s in your man drawer?
The Sun ^ | 20 May 2008 | MICHAEL McINTYRE

Posted on 05/20/2008 8:40:41 PM PDT by Daffynition

BRITISH men, having given over our houses to our wives, girlfriends and womenfolk, are defined by our one last place to survive . . . the man drawer.

I think it’s a little sexist to say women run the home.

It’s not that they take it over, it’s just that men don’t require very much. We require one drawer – this is a man drawer.

The man drawer is for general domestic maintenance and things we feel we may need in the future.

Lightbulbs. Should a bulb within the home blow, the man will search his man drawer.

Other things that may go in include batteries.

Batteries of undetermined life will be littered throughout. I don’t know how old batteries get there but they find their way in nonetheless.

We will also have instructions. They immediately go into the man drawer despite the fact we may no longer have the appliance to which they relate.

The problem with instructions in the man drawer is that they end up wedging the man drawer shut.

Sometimes you can’t open your man drawer – so you have this drawer responsible for maintenance and you can’t even get in it.

And often the tool you need to open your man drawer is in the drawer – even more frustrating as you tug at it.

Other things include foreign currency. Men feel that having earned money, we cannot throw it away.

So we hold on to it. The problem with foreign coins is you pretty much know you’ll never need access to them again.

I don’t know whether it influences your decision as to where to holiday – “I think we should go back to Spain because I have pesetas and I could buy you a newspaper in the airport on the way home.”

But now the euro has come so all the foreign currency we have is useless.

But still we hold on to it in case certain countries decide to relinquish the euro and we will go: “Fabulous. We should immediately go to Corfu and buy milk.”

The next thing we have is a variety of keys, including ones from places where we used to live. We don’t even know what they open any more.

It could be the key to an old shed or a locker but something about the key is just too mysterious and magical to throw away.

Alongside those keys are radiator keys. These are used to bleed radiators – a job only men can do because if you get it wrong you will be scalded in the face so we won’t let women do that.

Another huge section is Allen keys. Allen Key is a man, I believe, of Swedish origin – someone who developed the Allen key.

Outside of radiator keys, keys to your old home and Allen keys would be long keys used to secure the tops and bottoms of drawers.

I don’t even know what they are called but we have them in the man drawer alongside string.

String is there for suicide. Every man needs to know he can end it at any given time.

Takeaway menus are very important. Should we need takeaway food, the man has it covered.

I know in my house the kitchen is my wife’s but when we need to order cuisine in I will fetch menus from my man drawer.

These consist of an Indian menu and a Chinese menu whereupon, despite the huge choice, we always order exactly the same thing.

Every time we go through the process of taking out the menu and reading it only to confirm we want the same thing we have ordered throughout our eight-year relationship.

One last man drawer essential.

We hold on to mobile phones and chargers – man drawers are like mini mobile phone museums.

Many even have mobiles from the Eighties.


TOPICS: Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: banglist; drawer; man; mandrawer
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To: Stoat

I doubt they’d let it stay up there...Might offend someone.


41 posted on 05/20/2008 10:42:18 PM PDT by LongElegantLegs (Kill them with kindness, then taser them for fun.)
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To: Lokibob
Every man knows that the manufacturers put extra parts in the box in case you lose some of them. Every woman knows that the extra parts are left over because you are inept, and did not assemble it correctly.

Ya made me laugh with that one! Men DO understand women better than they think they do! LOL

42 posted on 05/20/2008 10:43:32 PM PDT by CAluvdubya (A good man has come home to San Diego! Thank you Congressman Hunter)
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To: Daffynition

Why only one? I have six


43 posted on 05/20/2008 10:46:34 PM PDT by wastedyears (Freedom is the right of all sentient beings. - Optimus Prime)
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To: Grizzled Bear

If she says it’s time for the guitars and amps to go, I think it’s time for the woman to go...


44 posted on 05/20/2008 10:47:11 PM PDT by wastedyears (Freedom is the right of all sentient beings. - Optimus Prime)
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To: LongElegantLegs
I doubt they’d let it stay up there...Might offend someone.

You're probably quite right.  The censors at The Sun are quite vigilant...I've had several of my own posts removed from there; or they don't even make it to the page to begin with.

The Daily Mail is even worse in that regard...I've NEVER had a post printed there.  Of course they were politically incorrect (why post otherwise?) but nothing offensive at all..

45 posted on 05/20/2008 10:52:47 PM PDT by Stoat (Rice / Coulter 2012: Smart Ladies for a Strong America)
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To: Daffynition

Man-drawer shman-drawer! A man needs a garage or a workshop with an honest to God roll away toolbox.


46 posted on 05/20/2008 10:58:07 PM PDT by MarineBrat (My wife and I took an AIDS vaccination that the Church offers.)
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To: Daffynition

my man


47 posted on 05/21/2008 12:26:01 AM PDT by purpleraine
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To: Daffynition

Truly a slow news day.


48 posted on 05/21/2008 12:38:18 AM PDT by paristwelve (.......the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them)
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To: Grizzled Bear
This is totally manly me in my manly untouchable perch:


49 posted on 05/21/2008 1:56:17 AM PDT by dr_lew
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To: Daffynition

Except for the radiator key the author has my my man drawer nailed. Actually I have more than one drawer.


50 posted on 05/21/2008 2:28:43 AM PDT by BluH2o
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To: Daffynition

.357 mag - 3 speed loaders and a bible.


51 posted on 05/21/2008 3:06:55 AM PDT by RSmithOpt (Liberalism: Highway to Hell)
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To: Daffynition

JB Weld, Duct tape, tie wraps, and RTV.


52 posted on 05/21/2008 3:41:42 AM PDT by CalvaryJohn (What is keeping that damned asteroid?)
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To: Daffynition

JB Weld, duct tape, tie wraps, and RTV.


53 posted on 05/21/2008 3:45:10 AM PDT by CalvaryJohn (What is keeping that damned asteroid?)
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To: Daffynition
My customized Springfield 1911 resides in my nightstand drawer when I'm in bed and on my hip when I'm not.

Custom Springfield Champion. Built by the late Joe Bonar

54 posted on 05/21/2008 6:04:25 AM PDT by P8riot (I carry a gun because I can't carry a cop.)
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To: Daffynition

Whew! At first I thought this thread would be about mens’ underwear....


55 posted on 05/21/2008 6:18:53 AM PDT by Ford4000
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To: Daffynition

I keep a mantool in my drawers. This article must be referring to a Metrosexual Drawer ‘cause real men don’t have menus from Indian or Chinese take-outs.

Besides, it takes nothing short of a two-car garage to keep all our crap for building stuff.


56 posted on 05/21/2008 6:31:18 AM PDT by Hatteras
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To: dayglored
I thought my husband was the only one that kept the old mobile phones!!LOL
The only reason he doesn't still have his BAG PHONE is that he gave it to his brother (presumably to put in HIS man-drawer)
57 posted on 05/21/2008 7:08:41 AM PDT by the lastbestlady (I now believe that we have two lives; the life we learn with and the life we live with after that.)
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To: wastedyears; Grizzled Bear
> If she says it’s time for the guitars and amps to go, I think it’s time for the woman to go...

AMEN! Some things are sacred...

58 posted on 05/21/2008 7:13:36 AM PDT by dayglored (Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!)
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To: Travis McGee
I've got me a whole man-cave. $:-)
59 posted on 05/21/2008 7:23:21 AM PDT by Joe Brower (Sheep have three speeds: "graze", "stampede" and "cower".)
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To: Daffynition

If you can fit everything ‘manly’ in your life in one drawer then you are a sad pathetic excuse for a male. I can’t even fit all my handguns in one drawer. Or the knives. And certainly not the tools or electronics.


60 posted on 05/21/2008 7:40:20 AM PDT by TalonDJ
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