Posted on 02/26/2008 11:28:54 AM PST by Lucky9teen
The editors of Marie Claire advise against bad tips, blow-drying, and cleaning your gun. We'll take their word for it.
19. Reveal how much your car cost.
18. Clean your gun.
17. Polish high school trophies (which you still have displayed).
16. Refer to your mother as your best friend.
15. Rap.
14. Check out our assistant/roommate/the baby-sitter.
13. Question our footwear.
12. Blow-dry your hair.
11. Tip less than 20 percent.
10. Celebrity impressions.
09. Impressions of us.
08. Forget to carry cash.
07. Flip it, flop it, swing it around, tug on it, adjust it, scratch it, or do anything that will remind us that it's just a goofy appendage and not a mystical source of pleasure and satisfaction.
06. Wii.
05. Boot and rally.
04. Scream—at the dog, at the guy who just stole your parking spot, at Bill Belichick. Because, no matter how much Belichick deserves it (cheater!), when we hear you raise your voice, we have an idea of what we're in for.
03. Talk about former exploits. Ever.
02. Use the words bitch, slut, tramp, or whore, unless referring to another man.
01. Tell us you're going to kiss us. (Just get on with it!)
(Excerpt) Read more at men.msn.com ...
Save that for when your daughter's date comes to the house.
boot and rally:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=boot+and+rally
I had to look it up, I aint been hip since 1979
Maybe only bad impressions. A great celebrity impression is awesome and any chick who can't dig that isn't worth being around.
07. [D]o anything that will remind us that it's just a goofy appendage and not a mystical source of pleasure and satisfaction.
It is a goofy appendage and it's a mystical source of pleasure and satisfaction (and more)! Honestly, we guys can't figure out why girls don't play with their boobs more. It's like living in Lake Buena Vista, FL and never going to Disney World.
The smartest thing I learned is to call my wife's sister a bitch when my wife tells me that her sister has been a bitch to her.
23. Richard Simmons imitations.
Thanks for the link. I was wondering what I was missing.
FWIW- I haven’t been hip since 1978. Thats the year I got married. LOL
And just what is wrong with Number 18. My dad always cleaned his carry gun on Saturday evening as his 3 daughters dates would come to call. He would ask the young men what time he could expect his daughters home.
Now my daughters take their dates out to the range to show them just how accurate a markswoman they are. We are talking major respect in this house.
If it doesn’t have spit or fart in it, the list can’t be real.
23. Or show any independent thought, manliness, or even a hint that you are equal...
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