Scientists can't get sloth to move

AP ^ | 01/24/07

[presidio9]

Scientists in the eastern German city of Jena said Wednesday they have finally given up after three years of failed attempts to entice a sloth into budging as part of an experiment in animal movement.

The sloth, named Mats, was remanded to a zoo after consistently refusing to climb up and then back down a pole, as part of an experiment conducted by scientists at the University of Jena's Institute of Systematic Zoology and Evolutionary Biology.

Neither pounds of cucumbers nor plates of homemade spaghetti were appetizing enough to make Mats move.

"Mats obviously wanted absolutely nothing to do with furthering science," said Axel Burchardt, a university spokesman.

Mats' new home is the zoo in the northwestern city of Duisburg where, according to all reports, he is very comfortable.

[Sloth]

Well, I don't like cucumbers, and their spaghetti sucks. I'm might be more tempted if they put out some roast with mashed potatoes & gravy.

[Slings and Arrows]

It's a Sloth. What, they didn't read its resume?

[Still Thinking]

Or a nice ribeye.

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

Exactly. If it was inclined to move they would have called it a jack rabbit.

[LibKill]

That's why they call it a sloth. (Snicker)

[highimpact]

I wonder if it has anything to do with the size of his testicles? I'm sure somebody will put in a grant request to study the correlation between a sloth's testicle size and his willingness to climb a pole to eat a plate of spaghetti. This could be real "breakthrough" science, on the same level as Jonus Salk's polio vaccine.

[Sloth]

I wonder if it has anything to do with the size of his testicles?

Hey, let's not get personal here!

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

Maybe a pretty girl sloth would do the trick.

:)

[sully777]

My apologies to The Pointer Sisters:


"She likes a sloth with a slow paw
She likes to mate with a ton o moss"

[SlidingW]

What of "sloth" do they not get?

[Slings and Arrows]

Hmmm...so there is ONE thing that'll get a sloth moving. ;^)

[Slings and Arrows]

Cute little guy. Looks kind of like a goblin from Labyrinth.

[presidio9]

More than one, actually

[NCC-1701]

Whenever I'm unfortunate to get stuck behind an extra slow driver, I call them a slowth. They drive like a sloth moves, which is extremely slow. Hence, slowth.

[Slings and Arrows]

Ouch!

[sully777]

That was a challenge? The sloth slowly looked at the bird then died.

[presidio9]

The sloth slowly looked at the bird then died.

By sloth standards, it happened in the blink of an eye.

[Irish_Thatcherite]

Scientists can't get sloth to move

Scientists lead donkey to water, can't get him to drink.