Posted on 01/11/2007 11:52:39 AM PST by martin_fierro
Man electrocuted by do-it-yourself mole-killer
2 hours, 17 minutes ago
BERLIN (Reuters) - A German retiree who wired up a high-voltage cable to try to wipe out the moles digging up his garden killed himself instead, police said Thursday.
Uwe Werner, police spokesman in Stralsund north of Berlin, said the 63-year-old retired construction foreman was found dead in the garden of his weekend house in Zingst next to a 380-volt cable and metal spikes rammed into the ground.
"The moles survived," Werner said, noting the voltage was enough to run a cement mixer or heavy-duty power saw. "It was in any event an unorthodox method to try to get rid of moles."
To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote . . . I got to get into this dude's pelt and crawl around for a few days. Who's the mole's ally? His friends? The harmless squirrel and the friendly rabbit.
ping
Your mole-nippled shirtless guy could go on this thread!
His fears weren't well-grounded.
One Saturday I went out to a little weedpatch airport with some T-hangars along a wire border fence. There was a dead dog tangled in the fence. I followed an ancient cloth-insulated extension cord back to a utility building where it was plugged into an outlet. Meter was spinning like crazy. Very lucky for me that I didn't touch the dog or the fence. Somebody apparently had been doing a little off-hours aircraft maintenance, I guess.
Goongagaloonga.
That was the first joke my uncle ever told me...back in the early 50's.
I smell varmint poon-tang.
Hello? Anybody home? Hello, Mr. Mole! It's me, Mr. Squirrel. Just a harmless squirrel. Not a high voltage wire or anything. Nothing to be worried about. I'm just here to make your last hours on earth as peaceful as possible. Don't mind this. This is doctor's orders. You don't mind if I just pop in there for a few laughs? That's right. Or in the words of Jean-Paul Sartre: "Au revoir, mole." This is going to be sweet.
Those things are great, I want one!
You're lucky. The first joke my uncle ever "told" me, also in the early 50s, was the "pull my finger" joke.
I think they learn that joke the first day of "Uncle" school.
I do too, but I live in New England and have no problem with ground critters. :)
Anyone put him in for a Darwin Award yet?
It was believed that the incident was due to the victim using
an inaccurate Babelfish translation of an Internet remedy
recommending hundreds of voles and spiking the water supply...
Here's my contribution!
http://www.badgerbadgerbadger.com/
LOL
THANKS!!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.