Posted on 10/18/2006 8:43:28 AM PDT by Millee
An Austrian roofer who slipped on the job ended up nailing himself to the roof - through his wedding tackle.
According to Ananova, 59-year-old August Voegl of Jennersdorf "shot the four-inch nail into his left testicle with the compressed air nail gun" and was thereafter "unable to extract it or pull himself away from the roof".
It was left to emergency medics to separate Voegl from the building and, after being whisked to hospital by air ambulance, he's reportedly "recovering well" following surgery. ®
I guess he hit it the wrong way?!
I imagine things weren't so bad 'til his buddies tried to rescue him with the claw hammer.
His buddies are probably in the fetal position rolling around on the ground.
Hmmm. Note to self. If I ever nail my balls to the roof, don't light up a cigarette. Things COULD actually get worse.
You get First Prize for that one, Hispana.
I first thought it was "Australian".
Poor guy will wish he had died from it, because his friends will never EVER let him forget this!
Was alcohol involved?
I put a staple through the web of my hand (twixt thumb and forefinger). Didn't hurt much that day but the next day was a different story.
wedding tackle?
Well, at least he didn't fall off the roof!
"Franks and Beans! Franks and Beans! ..."
Austria, huh? Wonder if the guy learned to yodel?
Me, too. Just sounds like something from 'down under'...
Crikey!!
Pray for W and Our Troops
It took a lot of balls for you to post that.
There's a vas deferens between good taste and bad taste. You've managed to straddle that line well.
Discretion is what separates the children from the groin ups.
Exactly. Ureter mature enough or you're nut.
From the "Unusual Case" column of _Aspects of Human Sexuality_, July 1991, by William A Morton, Jr, MD. Reprinted without permission.
"Scrotum Self-Repair"
One morning I was called to the emergency room by the head ER nurse. She directed me to a patient who had refused to describe his problem other than to say that he "needed a doctor who took care of men's problems."
The patient, about 40, was pale, febrile, and obviously uncomfortable, and had little to say as he gingerly opened his trousers to expose a bit of angry red and black-and-blue scrotal skin.
After I asked the nurse to leave us, the patient permitted me to remove his trousers, shorts, and two or three yards of foul-smelling stained gauze wrapped about his scrotum, which was swollen to twice the size of a grapefruit and extremely tender. A jagged zig-zag laceration, oozing pus and blood, extended down the left scrotum.
Amid the matted hair, edematous skin, and various exudates, I saw some half-buried dark linear objects and asked the patient what they were. Several days earlier, he replied, he had injured himself in the machine shop where he worked, and had closed the laceration himself with a heavy-duty stapling gun. The dark objects were one-inch staples of the type used in putting up wallboard.
We X-rayed the patient's scrotum to locate the staples; admitted him to the hospital; and gave him tetanus antitoxin, broad- spectrum antibacterial therapy, and hexachlorophene sitz baths prior to surgery the next morning. The procedure consisted of exploration and debridement of the left side of the scrotal pouch. Eight rusty staples were retrieved, and the skin edges were trimmed and freshened. The left testis had been avulsed and was missing. The stump of the spermatic cord was recovered at the inguinal canal, debrided, and the vessels ligated properly, though not much of a hematom was present. Through-and- through Penrose drains were sutured loosely in site, and the skin was loosely closed.
Convalescence was uneventful, and before his release from the hospital less than a week later, the patient confided the rest of his story to me. An unmarried loner, he usually didn't leave the machine shop at lunchtime with his co-workers. Finding himself alone, he had begun the regular practice of masturbating by holding his penis against the canvas drive-belt of a large floor-based piece of running machinery. One day, as he approached orgasm, he lost his concentration and leaned too close to the belt. When his scrotum suddenly became caught between the pulley-wheel and the drive-belt, he was thrown into the air and landed a few feet away. Unaware that he had lost his left testis, and perhaps too stunned to feel much pain, he stapled the wound closed and resumed work.
I can only assume he abandoned this method of self-gratification.
I hope that people who are neuter this post understand this is the kind of thing that separates the wieners from the losers.
"This is the kind of thing that separates losers from their wieners."
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