Giant Swiss Army Knife offers 85 tools

engadget.com ^ | Aug 24, 2006 | conrad quilty-harper

[weegee]

Wenger, the manufacturer of the classic Swiss Army Knife, has revealed a 9-inch long, 2-pound "knife" which carries 85 instruments, or: almost every tool that has ever been on a Swiss Army Knife, ever. The list includes seven different knives, a golf shoe spike wrench, a bike chain rivet setter, and a laser pointer with a 300ft range (but where's the freakin' USB flash drive?). Presumably this is so seasoned golfers can tune their bicycle's rivets before heading off on a deer hunt / cycling trip armed with blinding lasers and an entire collection of 3-inch knives. An equivalent "indoor" do-it-all gadget would feature Apple's entire iPod line-up, a SCSI to Parallel adapter and the collective consciousness of the Engadget staff in BBS form, contained in the form factor of a combination Bluetooth headset / wristwatch.

[Thanks, William S]

[Always Right]

Dumb idea. The whole idea of the Swiss Army knife is to have many tools in a convenient package. That does not fill that bill. No one would want to carry that. A nice $1200 novelty item I suppose.

[ConservativeMind]

It looks nine inches long and 20 inches wide.

Kind of hard to use, I would imagine.

[PDR]

and people wonder why switzerland has maintained is independence and neutrality for so many hundreds of years -- its because of cutting edge defensive weapons like this one -- no one can mount an effective defense against the spork.

[Sax]

Try using one of the middle implements!

[Sax]

Stay tuned for Swiss Army House - a corkscrew in every room.

[weegee]

TSA would probably still miss it in a sizeable percentage of security checks.

[Jack_1]

It is messing a satellite radio receiver or iPod.

[Cagey]

It just seems so much more complicated than the French Army Knife.

[cuz_it_aint_their_money]

Try using one of the middle implements!

Actually, I would think it would be easier to use one of the middle implements than one on either end.

[llevrok]

Stay tuned for Swiss Army House - a corkscrew in every room.

Stay tuned for the Liberal Army House - a screw loose in every room.

[SampleMan]

Appears to be the result of a defense department contract. "Utility knife to cover all eventualities."

[angkor]

"Stay tuned for Swiss Army House - a corkscrew in every room."

Sure, along with the Eddie Bean Down-Filled Canoe Hat.

(both from a long-forgotten National Lampoon parody of outdoor catalogs)

[RubyCosmos]

It just seems so much more complicated than the French Army Knife.

That's canned condensed brilliance.

[RubyCosmos]

If it covers all eventualities, then it should have something that will take care of the eventuality of it not having what you need.

[Doomonyou]

Dumb idea. The whole idea of the Swiss Army knife is to have many tools in a convenient package. That does not fill that bill. No one would want to carry that.

All true, but I still want one!

[Doomonyou]

Another view.

[marmar]

One leather man and one regular Swiss Army knife works for me......

[Spktyr]

It's the Swiss Army Brick!

[Tijeras_Slim]

And the dang thing still won't make bushels of julianne fires.