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A Self Defense Test (Complete and utter Vanity post)
unknown ^ | unknown | Unknown

Posted on 06/21/2006 1:30:19 PM PDT by Fighting Irish

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock Cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have only three seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

________________________________________________________

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be intent just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.

________________________________________________________

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

________________________________________________________

Texas Republican's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds of reloading). BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click...

Daughter: Nice grouping,Daddy! Were those Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?

Son: Git-r-Dun, Pop! Can I shoot the next one?

Wife: You are NOT taking that to the Taxidermist!


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: notnews; therethatsbetter; wrongforum

1 posted on 06/21/2006 1:30:23 PM PDT by Fighting Irish
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To: Fighting Irish

Funny and true!


2 posted on 06/21/2006 1:33:35 PM PDT by American Quilter (Equal laws protecting equal rights...the best guarantee of loyalty and love of country. -- Madison)
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To: Fighting Irish

.....i thought it was cute....


3 posted on 06/21/2006 1:33:49 PM PDT by Fighting Irish (Ever find yourself posting messages just to show off your taglines?)
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To: Fighting Irish

Gun Control is being able to place all shots on target.


4 posted on 06/21/2006 1:34:09 PM PDT by Deaf Smith (**Tagline is need-to-know only.)
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To: Fighting Irish

This has been posted a few times before. I have only one question for the Texan. Why did he not load the magazines fully?


5 posted on 06/21/2006 1:34:22 PM PDT by ASA Vet (The North Koreans are not testing weapons, they are testing us.)
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To: Fighting Irish
Democrat's Answer:

How much carbon is emmitted from the barrel of this gun?

Will the noise disturb the local wildlife?

What if he is not intending to harm me, but some Iraqi? Or Republican?

6 posted on 06/21/2006 1:35:27 PM PDT by Onelifetogive (Freerepublic - The website where "Freepers" is not in the spell checker dictionary...)
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To: ASA Vet
Why did he not load the magazines fully?

Or at least counting his shots.......

7 posted on 06/21/2006 1:36:21 PM PDT by Fighting Irish (Ever find yourself posting messages just to show off your taglines?)
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To: Fighting Irish
US Army Infantryman's answer.

Bang. Bang.

"Now while you lay there screaming from those rounds in your kneecaps Mr Terrorist, I am going to introduce you to my friend here, Mr. Softball bat. However, before we do that, here is a nice bag of Pork Rinds you are going to feed eat. Allah u abkbar Mother#$%

8 posted on 06/21/2006 1:37:19 PM PDT by MNJohnnie (The US Military. We kill foreigners so you don't have too.)
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To: ASA Vet

BUMP!


9 posted on 06/21/2006 1:37:59 PM PDT by Publius6961 (Multiculturalism is the white flag of a dying country)
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To: MNJohnnie

Pork Rinds you are going to feed eat. Allah u abkbar Mother#$%






I like that


10 posted on 06/21/2006 1:38:45 PM PDT by Fighting Irish (Ever find yourself posting messages just to show off your taglines?)
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To: Fighting Irish
GEORGIA REPUBLICAN'S ANSWER:

*Thud* (drops glock)
*rustle - SHANK* (whips out alternative Class III weapon)
BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA (clack-sssshick) (reload) BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA-BUDDA

Never leave home without it.

11 posted on 06/21/2006 1:39:33 PM PDT by Lazamataz (First we beat the Soviet Union. Then we became them.)
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To: Fighting Irish

It's missing the "uunnggghhh...." at the end of the Democrat's response. Actually, I think it'd be somewhere in the middle - that's way too much to think about in 3 seconds!


12 posted on 06/21/2006 1:40:09 PM PDT by Kaylee Frye
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To: Lazamataz

No worries, dropping a Glock is safe.


13 posted on 06/21/2006 1:42:14 PM PDT by ASA Vet (The North Koreans are not testing weapons, they are testing us.)
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To: Fighting Irish

High Sierra Backpacker's response...

*BIG BANG*

...but only one...

14 posted on 06/21/2006 1:45:05 PM PDT by MarineBrat (Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.)
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To: Lazamataz
Former SF Sniper's answer:

BANG

One shot, one kill. Now stop wasting ammo;-)

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

15 posted on 06/21/2006 2:16:16 PM PDT by Sarajevo (Life is a sexually transmitted disease. -R. D. Laing)
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To: Sarajevo
Former SF Sniper's answer: BANG One shot, one kill. Now stop wasting ammo;-)

If there were a post of the day, You win!

16 posted on 06/21/2006 6:53:07 PM PDT by MNJohnnie (The US Military. We kill foreigners so you don't have too.)
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To: Fighting Irish
Son: Git-r-Dun, Pop! Can I shoot the next one?

Wife: You are NOT taking that to the Taxidermist!

I had seen the other part. These last two are a great addition. Thanks for the laugh today!

17 posted on 06/21/2006 6:55:07 PM PDT by MNJohnnie (The US Military. We kill foreigners so you don't have too.)
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