Posted on 05/16/2006 8:51:14 AM PDT by pulaskibush
The Mexican people aren't the only ones who realize that the "country" known as Mexico is no longer a civilized nation. Thousands of animals are leaving the 3rd world cesspool that should be an oil rich world superpower.
El Cujo, a miniature Chihuahua who recently crossed the border complained about Mexico's poor health conditions. "I may eat crap, nibble my butt, and look like a rat with acromegaly, but I don't want to live in a country that has to send ambulances to another country for emergency healthcare. El Cujo also knows that US doctors don’t extort families of foreigners who require medical care unlike Mexico and any animal knows about Mexico’s “water” issue. El Cujo is a security dog for the former rap artist Eminem.
Taurus Gutierrez, a former Mexican fighting bull who now works in an Arkansas Rodeo, stated that the cops are just car thieves in uniform, the army are a bunch human/drug traffickers in uniform, and all three ruling branches of the government are just puppets of those rich enough to bribe them. In short, the entire Mexican government system is BS. "I got better odds in a Tyson's slaughterhouse than in some war-zone like Nuevo Laredo or Juarez."
Perhaps the most famous animal angry at the laziness of Mexico is the golden eagle (Aquila chrysaetos) on the Mexican Flag. The Golden has filed sued in the International Court demanding that his image be removed from the mexican flag.
http://www.enchantedlearning.com/school/Mexico/Flagprintout.shtml and http://www.inside-mexico.com/flag.htm
“I will not be the mascot of a bunch of lazy faggots who can’t even run a land that has an abundant of resources and has been protected from war for decades. My cousin, the bald eagle, is the mascot of the most powerful country in the world. His country has liberated millions from nazism, communism, islamo-fascism, slavery, starvation, disease, and poverty. His country has a good economy despite giving billions to other countries, corporate scandals, and terrorist attacks. I get the always poor country that hasn’t fought for anything since they beat the French! I could beat the French by myself! At least the other Central American countries went through wars and still managed to send some troops to Iraq! What has this so-called nation of mexico ever done?”
The Golden Eagle is suing for defamation of character, slander, emotional damage, and trademark rights. He is being represented by Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law. Some details about Mexico's "accomplishments" are below.
http://www.signonsandiego.com/uniontrib/20040912/news_mz1e12dresse.html
http://www.strategypage.com/fyeo/qndguide/default.asp?target=mexico
http://www.state.gov/g/drl/rls/hrrpt/2004/41767.htm
New technology was used to conduct these interviews. The technology to communicate with animals is a classified CIA project created by an agent named Plame to use animals to spy on terrorist. The program is to be kept Top Secret by order of Sen. Patrick Leahy, and is going to be implemented sometime next year.
Even the chupacabras have thrown in the towel. They are headed north.
Is that "Beware the Chupacabras" or "Don't run over the Chupacabras"?
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