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Scientists: masturbation not as good as sex
The Register (Geeks ,,, Who Else?) ^ | Thursday 23rd February 2006 | Chris Williams

Posted on 02/24/2006 4:03:14 AM PST by texas booster

*** And you thought you just weren't doing it right ***

A swift one off the wrist - easy, convenient, refreshing - but just not the same as the real thing, perhaps.

Reporting in the journal Biological Psychology, researchers have now found a basis in physiology for the niggling dissatisfaction.

Levels of the hormone prolactin are lower after masturbation than intercourse. Prolactin makes us feel satisfied by counteracting the arousal messenger dopamine.

The levels of prolactin in the blood of subjects who committed an act of self-pollution after watching grumble flicks were just one fifth of those who had had actual sex in the lab. Still, either way, nice work if you can get it.

The scientists say the difference also explains why men may need a "recovery period" after forming The Beast with Two Backs, but can happily nip to the loo for five minutes, make the bald man cry, then get straight back to work.®


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: captainobvious; dirty; duh; filth; filthy; masturbation; perversion; perverted; selfpollution; sick
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To: texas booster

What'e it gonna be big boy?

21 posted on 02/24/2006 4:15:44 AM PST by AndrewB
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To: texas booster

Woody Allen:

"Masturbation is having sex with someone you love."


22 posted on 02/24/2006 4:16:43 AM PST by beaver fever
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To: Larry Lucido
I wonder if online submission is allowed?
Nocturnal submission is the norm...
23 posted on 02/24/2006 4:17:45 AM PST by AndrewB
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To: beaver fever

"make the bald man cry" ??

that's a new one, and highly disturbing, too


24 posted on 02/24/2006 4:19:11 AM PST by babble-on
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To: texas booster
"One great thing about masturbation: you certainly don't have to look your best!"

-- The Boys in the Band, Matt Crowley; 1970

25 posted on 02/24/2006 4:19:11 AM PST by KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle ("It'sTime for Republicans to Start Toeing the Conservative Line, NOT the Other Way Around!")
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To: Paulus

Talk to the hand.


26 posted on 02/24/2006 4:21:27 AM PST by ZeitgeistSurfer (Visit the Iran Crater in 2008)
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To: AndrewB

Yeechh!

Killed that wet dream!


27 posted on 02/24/2006 4:21:57 AM PST by texas booster (Join FreeRepublic's Folding@Home team (Team # 36120))
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To: texas booster

Rosey Palm or Helen Thomas. No contest. These guys need to study further, and list some exceptions!

LLS


28 posted on 02/24/2006 4:23:10 AM PST by LibLieSlayer (Preserve America... kill terrorists... destroy dims!)
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To: Neville72; Dashing Dasher

well duh!


29 posted on 02/24/2006 4:23:20 AM PST by Perdogg ("Facts are stupid things" - Pres. Ronald W. Reagan)
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To: ZeitgeistSurfer
Talk to the hand.

LOL!!!

Now this reply deserves a reward!

Or a kleenex ...

30 posted on 02/24/2006 4:23:20 AM PST by texas booster (Join FreeRepublic's Folding@Home team (Team # 36120))
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To: texas booster

I'm having trouble seeing the monitor clearly and all the palm hair is getting tangled in the keyb.$&*! OUCH. (:^D)


31 posted on 02/24/2006 4:24:46 AM PST by WideGlide (That light at the end of the tunnel might be a muzzle flash.)
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To: R. Scott
I wonder how much this cost to learn.

They probably paid college students to participate in this study.

At my age I would have volunteered, if I could remember how.

32 posted on 02/24/2006 4:27:53 AM PST by texas booster (Join FreeRepublic's Folding@Home team (Team # 36120))
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To: AndrewB

stop posting photographs of Jimmy Carter !



... sick allready ...


33 posted on 02/24/2006 4:27:55 AM PST by globalheater (There is no instance of a country having benefited from prolonged warfare - Sun Tzu)
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To: DainBramage
Its already against the law to choke chickens.

And PETA will picket if it finds out about any monkey spanking going on.

34 posted on 02/24/2006 4:29:10 AM PST by DumpsterDiver
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To: WideGlide

Do women go blind and grow hairy palms, or just men?

Inquiring minds want to know.


35 posted on 02/24/2006 4:29:11 AM PST by texas booster (Join FreeRepublic's Folding@Home team (Team # 36120))
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To: texas booster
Do women go blind and grow hairy palms, or just men?

Just updated ... women get dates, not hairy palms ...

36 posted on 02/24/2006 4:31:12 AM PST by texas booster (Join FreeRepublic's Folding@Home team (Team # 36120))
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To: peyton randolph
And all they got was this lousy t shirt


37 posted on 02/24/2006 4:32:49 AM PST by Kozak (Anti Shahada: " There is no God named Allah, and Muhammed is his False Prophet")
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To: texas booster
Do women go blind and grow hairy palms, or just men? Inquiring minds want to know.

If you don't know the answer to your question you must be doing it wrong. (:^D)

38 posted on 02/24/2006 4:33:51 AM PST by WideGlide (That light at the end of the tunnel might be a muzzle flash.)
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To: AndrewB

The gallows if you don't mind


39 posted on 02/24/2006 4:34:01 AM PST by Cheapskate (America , -- -- -- -- Yeah!)
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To: texas booster

of course not, it will also make you go blind!


40 posted on 02/24/2006 4:40:00 AM PST by nascar242005 (..)
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