The Advice Goddess

Westword.com ^ | Amy Alkon

[Millee]

I'm 40, the cute girl from upstairs is 23. When she stopped by to commiserate about loud neighbors, we had a beer, went dancing, and then had sex. Afterward, she seemed weird and left abruptly. I wrote her a note, "Sorry if I made you uncomfortable, but I love you and look forward to seeing you again." She hasn't looked at me since. Where did I go wrong? -- Mr. Neighbor

Grateful as you may be to a girl for having sex with you, it's never a good idea to let on. You could've had a future with her -- the kind 40-year-old guys without handfuls of bling typically have with 23-year-old girls: jump-starting their cars, lugging their couches up four flights of stairs, and maybe catching a little action when there are no hot young guys to be found. You blew it, though, with "I'm a lonely sack of emptiness!" -- which is how "I love you" translates after one beer, one dance, and one roll in the sack. (You say "I love you"; she says "It seemed like a good idea at the time.")

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

How would you have handled it?

Being the stud that you are, pissant.

[HitmanLV]

Subtle difference.

Huge difference.

[PaulaB]

ahhh I see..I remembered I knew you from somewhere!!!

[HitmanLV]

What's heavy about it? That wasn't my intent, sorry if it came across as that way.

Just a pet peeve of mine. "Winners never quit?" Winners quit all the time. I never understood that mindset, that's all. :-)

[Dashing Dasher]

though me and Mr. Jeeves have considered co-hosting a $ 1,000-a-head weekeend seminar here in Las Vegas to turn Freeper 'nice guys' into more macho, decisive, and uncompromising types. Attraction from women naturally follows. :-)

Then why aren't you married?
Or, do you just use women as playthings?

Signed,

Just curious...

[HitmanLV]

Could be!

[Dashing Dasher]

I love that song!

I have to actually TRY not to move my head like those loser freaks in the movie.

LOL!!!

[peacebaby]

it's "Mr. Jeeves and I"

dude.

[Dashing Dasher]

Not to us.

[HitmanLV]

Then why aren't you married? Or, do you just use women as playthings?

That's a fair question.

I'm not married because I don't want to be and haven't met a woman I want to share my life with. And no, I don't use women as playthings. That's a false choice - it's not one or the other, it's silly to think of things that way.

[SoothingDave]

Hey, I can still use "forty" in the first syllable, so there!

"Forty" is two syllables. :-)

SD

[peacebaby]

I have nooooooo idea what you're talking about, HitmanNY.

But I can assure you quitters ARE NOT winners. Goes against life, kiddo.

Peace. :~)

[Dashing Dasher]

I've read your Psycho-Babble and figured those were your choices.

And you say women play games?

I laugh at your absurdity.

[HitmanLV]

Oh well, people don't pay me $5k a day to notice little stuff like that. You're right, though, thanks!

By the way, how much are you paid to notice little stuff like that? Hahahaah!!! :-)

[pissant]

If I were the 23 YO chick: Move far, far away

If I were the 40 YO guy: Become buddhist monk in Myanmar

If I were the Advice columnist: Call him an idiot

[peacebaby]

"Hey, I can still use "forty" in the first syllable, so there!

"Forty" is two syllables. :-):

Yeah, but when you pull Maximus' finger, it comes out as ONE LONG SYLLABLE!

[PaulaB]

I love it too ;) LOL

What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me, no more
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me, no more
What is love
Yeah

[SoothingDave]

I'm 40, the cute girl from upstairs is 23. When she stopped by to commiserate about loud neighbors, we had a beer, went dancing, and then had sex. Afterward, she seemed weird and left abruptly. I wrote her a note, "Sorry if I made you uncomfortable, but I love you and look forward to seeing you again." She hasn't looked at me since. Where did I go wrong? -- Mr. Neighbor

How is it that no one has raised the possibility that the sex was horrendously awful, and that's why she fled?

SD

[Maximus of Texas]

Let's stop this before it turns into another beaten down thread, similar to the one that took place last week when HitmanNY and Mr. Jeezes posted similar remarks. Ladies, you're not going to change his mind and he's not going to change yours.

[PaulaB]

LOL