**** Official Friday Silliness Thread ****

FR | 10/28/2005 | TheUsualSuspects

[BJClinton]

Funny thing happened on the way to the office...okay, not really funny, but upon entering my office I was smacked in the face with the overwhelming smell of propane (insert Hank Hill joke). Our office shares the same building with a restaraunt (source of the propane leak) and a veteranarian's office, so I've spent the last few hours evacuating cats, dogs and some kinda lizard from the vet and trying to convince English-challenged kitchen staff to evacuate. But that's over, I'm back at home and it's time for a beer. Oh, and the OFST ping list is on a 'puter surrounded by explosive gas so if y'all could ping some of the usual suspects...

[Maximus of Texas]

Oh, yes, several times. One thing I always do over at my mom's is go into her shower and wrap the bar of soap with toliet paper. That way she gets in and grabs it with a wet hand and then has to deal with wet toilet paper. I've also been known to do this at homes of friends, family and people I barely know.

Good times. Good times

(and no, I can't take credit for that piece but I have the same sense of humor)

[teenyelliott]

Abby Normal

[PaulaB]

LOL yep...

was jamming to that earlier and thus

the creation


I feel a hot wind on my shoulder
And the touch of a world that is older
Turn the switch and check the number
Leave it on when in bed I slumber

[w_over_w]

Got brains?

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

Hey, how are you. Long time no see. (you know what I mean)

[PaulaB]

ew

[EX52D]

Thanks for the tip, I'm going to pull that one on my husband tonight.

[najida]

LOL!

I really don't want to be, honest. Nothing happening is a good thing, and something I'm trying to cultivate.

[Dashing Dasher]

My first Rottweiler's name was Abby Normal.

;-)

(Dad used to call her @#$@HEAD - but he told me it was a sign of affection)

[dorathexplorer]

Ok, that link didn't work...don't know what happened



But here's 20 Ways To Confuse Trick-Or-Treaters:

---

Give away something other than candy. (Toothpicks, golf balls, bags of sand, etc.)

Wait behind the door until some people come. When they get near the door, jump out, wearing a costume, and holding a bag, and yell, "Trick or Treat!" Look at them, scratch your head, and act confused.

Fill a briefcase with marbles and crackers. Write on it, "Top Secret" in big letters. When trick-or-treaters come, look around suspiciously, say, "It's about time you got here," give them the briefcase, and quickly shut the door.

Get about 30 people to wait in your living room. When trick-or-treaters come to the door, say, "Come in." When they do, have everyone yell, "Surprise!!!" Act like it's a surprise party.

Get everyone who comes to the door to come in and see if they can figure out what's wrong with your dishwasher. Insist that it makes an unnatural "whirring" sound.

After you give them candy, hand the trick-or-treaters a bill.

Open the door dressed as a giant fish. Immediately collapse, and don't move or say anything until the trick-or-treaters go away.

When you answer the door, hold up one candybar, throw it out into the street, and yell, "Crawl for it!"

When you answer the door, look at the trick-or-treaters, act shocked and scared, and start screaming your head off. Slam the door and runaround the house, screaming until they go away.

Insist that the trick-or-treaters each do ten push-ups before you give them any candy.

Hand out menus to the trick-or-treaters and let them order their candy. Keep asking if anyone wants to see the wine list.

Get a catapult. Sit on your porch and catapult pumpkins at anyone who comes within 50 yards of your house.

When people come to the door, jump out a nearby window, crashing through the glass, and run as far away from your house as you can.

Answer the door dressed as a pilgrim. Stare at the trick-or-treaters for a moment, pretend to be confused, and start flipping through a calendar.

Instead of candy, give away colored eggs. If anyone protests, explain that the eggs are the only thing you had left over from Easter.

Answer the door dressed as a dentist. Angrily give the trick-or-treaters a two-hour lecture on tooth decay.

Answer the door with a mouthful of M & M's and several half-eaten candy bars in your hands. Act surprised, and close the door. Open it again in a few seconds, and insist that you don't have any candy.

Hand out cigarettes and bottles of asprin.

Put a crown on a pumpkin and put the pumpkin on a throne on your porch. Insist that all of the trick-or-treaters bow before the pumpkin.

Dress up like a bunny rabbit. Yell and curse from the moment you open the door, and angrily throw the candy at the trick-or-treaters. Slam the door when you're finished.

[Maximus of Texas]

Leaf blower come with that radio?

[Darksheare]

You too?

You Are Creepy

Serial killers would run away from you in a flash.

How Scary Are You?

[Dashing Dasher]

Who got the ZOT?

Where are all the posts?

I can't leave you people alone for ten minutes!!!!

[HeadOn]

May you have an "uneventful" weekend...

[teenyelliott]

Man, I wish I had some friends. I'd do that to em.

[Maximus of Texas]

Another thing I do at Christmas at the homes of friends, family and folks I barely know ("FFFBK") is hang weird stuff on their Christmas tree. It may be something from their book shelf, something I didn't to care to eat or something I pulled out of my bellybutton.

The joy of the season is going home LMAO knowing they won't discover it until they undecorate the tree.


So, who is inviting me over this year?

[Dashing Dasher]

Not yet - did you?

[PaulaB]

We've all been good... except for Max..as usual

[Dashing Dasher]

You are a delightfully odd little man.

[Maximus of Texas]

Hey, there is always the "folks I barely know" category. Those are the most fun because they'll never suspect you.