The Joy of Unstable Co-Workers.....(vanity)

PA Times | 9/23/05 | Dr. Pissant

[pissant]

Most of us have held several different jobs over the years. Some good, some bad, and some in between. It seems no matter where we are employed, there is always a few "unusual" people that we are forced to work with. The office gossip, the Casanova, the nose picker, etc. etc.

To help honor these less than stable individuals, I think it is worthwhile to commit their stories to the FR archives for posterity's sake!

I'll start

[pissant]

1. When I worked at a large unnamed Aerospace company in the Seattle area, I had to work with a mechanical engineer that can only be described as "the world's most sensitive man". As most of you know by now, I'm far from shy and reserved, and when it comes to relations with my co-workers, I like frank and forthright dialogue. But this guy Robin (name explains alot..lol) could not handle even the mildest criticism. If he selected a pump motor that was a voltage unavailable in the area, and I told him he's have to pick another, he'd get pouty and defensive. He was single (but not an ugly guy) and one day I made a joke about him striking out with the ladies. He did not talk to me for a month.

2. When I worked as a bartender, a new, cute waitress, Julie, was hired (we only hired cuties). My pal John immediately started the pursuit and ended up dating her within a few weeks. I had a girlfriend at the time, so I didn't bother with her. Shortly after, I noticed a strange pattern of Julie's behavior. She would one day be hostile and curt with me, then the next time I saw her she would purposely rub her breasts against me or outrageosly flirt when we were working together. Though still dating my buddy, she started leaving me notes and voicemails. She had overheard me telling another waitress that I liked short hair on women. A week later, she shows up at work with a sexy short cut. Needless to say, she made things pretty darn uncomfortable for John and I!

[cripplecreek]

When I was a paint room foreman a few years back we hired a new material handler. I knew we were in for a treat when he stuck his hand out for a shake and said "Hi I'm Derrick, I was diagnosed as an undifferentiated Schizophrenic."

[pissant]

I hope you are joking!!

[cripplecreek]

Nope not kidding, Derrick was nuts. Fun to work around but we couldn't play metallica music when he was around.

[PaulaB]

Millee and I were just talking about this last week. **LOL**

At my last job I was the boss over someone that had HIV
I feel that I am a very compassionate person but this guy was
off his rocker. He hated everyone. He stunk so bad due
to I guess he sweated the cocktail he had to constantly take. It was awful!!!

Let me think of more ......

[LongElegantLegs]

...she would purposely rub her breasts against me or outrageously flirt when we were working together.

Aw, Pissant, you missed a golden opportunity...You should have sued for sexual harassment.

[pissant]

I'd have played only classical music and painted the walls pink for him...

[pissant]

*shudder* A bitter, dying guy can't be much fun!

[pissant]

I took the opportunity, unfortunately. But it wasn't the lawsuit opportunity. ;o)

[Millee]

I was working at a bank once {{shudder}} where on the first day of starting, our new bank president announced that since she didn't know any of us there was no way she could trust us & she wanted us all to take a lie detector test to determine whether we'd ever stolen money from the bank. Such a peach. (Well I grabbed my Pravada bag, jumped into my Ferrari and told HER where she could stuff it!) Harumph!

[lady lawyer]

Under the Americans with Disabilities Act, the more dysfunctional you are, the more job security you have.

[PaulaB]

Believe it or not
he told me one day that he and his "partner" had a coffin in their house and that it was totally cool
also since the partner worked at a museum he would bring home bones...

I think he was the devil!!!

[pissant]

LOL. Good move!

[Fierce Allegiance]

You should have sued for sexual harassment.

Pissant is probably thinking "Harassment nothing to me. It was the parts she was rubbing that I liked best."

[PaulaB]

**LOL**
Thats my Millee..
drunk on planes and catching rubber away
from a bank with a great purse and a smile

[Millee]

Thanks dearie! (Don't forget the granny panties too!) ;-)

[pissant]

Especially if it's a gov't job!!!

[pissant]

And an idiot, apparently! No wonder he was aids infested.

[cripplecreek]

I wasn't about to waste Derricks illness like that. Besides he sang x rated opera for us all the time and was good at it. He was a total WWF fan and built like a wrestler. He had a full beard and a long pony tail.

Once a week the foremen and management would hold meetings in a office with large windows overlooking the shop floor. During one of those meetings I happened to look up and see Derrick at the far end of the shop doing a strip tease next to his fork lift for me.

[pissant]

After she got her haircut, I tried to figure a way to have her and not lose my buddy or my girlfriend. Ah, to be twentysomething again. LOL