Posted on 07/29/2005 7:51:34 AM PDT by pissant
Keystone Light
You need 30 beers in one package but you only have $10. Also, for some reason you need to get drunk. There is a slight possibility that your taste buds were destroyed in some horrible accident during your days as a fire breather with a traveling freak show, enabling you to consume many Keystones without making a horrifed, disgusted face every time you swallow.
Bud Light
You need 30 beers in one package but you only have $10. Also, for some reason you need to get drunk. There is a slight possibility that your taste buds were destroyed in some horrible accident during your days as a fire breather with a traveling freak show, enabling you to consume many Keystones without making a horrifed, disgusted face every time you swallow.
Original Coors
You have never met me, because I don't know anyone who drinks this beer. I imagine, though, that you are some sort of mountain man with a scruffy beard who could use refreshment after spending weeks in the Rockies distancing himself from the trivialities of the modern world.
Corona Extra
You are married, live in the suburbs and are having friends over for a barbecue. There is also a chance that you really enjoy limes, but are having a difficult time working them into your diet. Small things amuse you and you enjoy watching the lime fizzle in the bottle after you stick your finger in and turn it upside down to achieve maximum limey pleasure.
Stag
Your stomach did something to make you angry and now you are returning the favor. You enjoy spending time on the toilet and will do it often for about three days if you drink a six pack of this beer-flavored laxative. Hunting is probably one of your hobbies and the red deer on the gold can is understandably difficult to pass up. Also, you may have lost a bet or are blind and could not tell which beer you were purchasing.
Guinness
You consider yourself something of a serious beer connoisseur. Undoubtedly you enjoy the occasional cup of coffee, as your choice of beer has a similar taste. When at a pub you like to partake in this brand because the foam on the top provides the opportunity for you to get a foam mustache and show your friends how funny you look. If you drink this beer regularly, you most likely claim some degree of Irish heritage. In all likelihood there was/is a "Guinness is Good For You" sign in your dorm/fraternity room/apartment.
Old Style (better known as Doggy Style)
You are at Wrigley Field watching the Cubs. There is no other excuse to drink this.
Michelob Ultra
You desire to be fit and attractive very much, but are unwilling to give up things—like beer drinking—that are necessary to achieve this goal. The word "carbs" was an important part of your vocabulary during the low carbs craze, but you are not really sure what the benefits of cutting carbs out of your diet might be. However, to be safe, you will drink a beer that claims to be low in carbs.
Killians is a good alternative if you enjoy fog-bound hangovers! And I know you do, Najida! :o)
You saunter into your local Irish pub thinking you're going to be cool and order a pinta good ol' Irish ale, clueless that its actually and American beer.
PBRs!! God's gift to the budget concious imbiber. It's made a huge resurgence in the NW lately!
I don't have hangovers, thankyouverymuch, Mr. Smartypants ;)
Is there any good Iraqi beer?
That's a Texas beer, isn't it? I thought everyone drank Lone Star & Pearl down there! ;o)
You and PapaT both have good taste. And you know having Pissant's blessing will make taste even better! ;o)
Labatts? Are you a Canuck like Argh??
That was about Killians, BTW.
I just like the way it tastes...
And it's what I steal from my brother's fridge, so it's free.
I take it you are female then!
It's just you! LOL
I recovered from my hangeover enough to get out to buy more beer! Cheers back at ya! ;o)
Duff? I prefer what Hank Hill drinks! ;o)
I like an icy cold Grolsch once in a while. The bottles are cool too!
Natural Light? My goodness, I'd completely forgotten about that. I think you can still buy a case for $7.99. LOL
Aw, Peggy, you forgot to pick up a case of Alamo when you were at the Mega-lo-mart.
And no taste buds, to boot! ;o)
How's my Bertha doin, BTW?
LOL. Make that "Ociffer". ;o)
I'm learning to avoid your wrath! ;o)
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