Posted on 04/15/2005 8:30:45 AM PDT by pissant
1. Ask her to dance.
2. On windy days, brush wayward strands of hair from her eyes and mouth.
3. When she’s coming down the street, across the room, or up the stairs to meet you, walk towards her as soon as you see her.
4. Kiss her between her shoulder blades when she turns her back to you to go to sleep.
5. Put your arm around her when you introduce her to your friends and family.
6. Grasp her hand when a scantily dressed, beautiful woman walks by.
7. Call her when you’re feeling sad.
8. Kiss her eyelids.
9. Ask to see a picture of her when she was a child.
10. Wash her from head to toe in the shower.
11. If she’s crying on the phone, go over to her place. Immediately.
12. TOO NAUGHTY (ed)
13. Occasionally call her by her first and middle names.
14. Buy her your favourite rock album of all time on vinyl.
15. Order coffee for her, remembering exactly how she likes it.
16. Undress her and put her to bed when she falls asleep in the car.
17. Mention your upcoming anniversary before she does.
18. Send her something in the mail. Anything.
19. When she’s feeling insecure, stare into her eyes and tell her there is no-one in the world who could be as right for you as she is.
20. Call her just before you get on the plane.
21. Pick her clothes up off the floor.
22. Try desperately to make her laugh when she’s feeling down.
23. Take her to see your favourite sport live. Pay more attention to her than to the game.
24. Touch her arm when you leave the table to go to the bathroom. Touch her again when you come back.
25. Shave just before you see her. She’ll notice.
26. Hug her when she gets jealous. Hug her hard.
27. Worship her breasts.
28. Give her jewellery.
29. Hand her two towels when she gets out of the shower. (The second one is for her hair.)
30. Ask her specific questions about her work.
31. Keep her favourite cereal on hand.
32. In the middle of a conversation, tell her you love her.
33. Send her very expensive flowers when you screw up.
34. Take her to a cabin with a fireplace. Build her a fire.
35. TOO SAUCY (ed)
36. Read her a story when it’s her turn to drive during a long road trip.
37. Offer to fix something at her place that you realise is broken.
38. Notice when she’s wearing something new.
39. Make love to her standing up, against a wall.
40. Kiss her hand in front of your most die-hard bachelor buddies.
41. If she’s too stressed to want sex... a. Run a bath for her. b. Give her a full-body massage. c. Ask if she wants to wrestle.
cute one...you need to post that to the silliness thread.
I aint no gold digger ho!
HAHAHAHAHA!!
I think I hurt myself! :) That is a good one, though, :)
*wink*
Relax. Making a little funny. Don't take it personally.
Let me give you a piece of advice. Pay attention, now. Listen closely.
Make matress-squeaky-noises with each and every single woman you can.
That's because, 1) you can't regret not following up if you followed up, and 2) Someday you will get old and you won't have the opportunities like you used to.
....perhaps I used the wrong word when I said stare, what I meant was, gawk, drool or swoon.
Any man has enough time without his wife to do that, save it for then.
....Else wise 90% of the time, the party, dinner, dance or date will turn sour.
I didn't take it the wrong way...I'm fine. :+}
what's also missing is: Honey, hold these two wires, will ya?
I fell for that one twice!
I miss you PING
Once I taught my son that trick, my wife would never fall for it. [sigh]
It is truly AMAZING Wilt Chamberlain supposedly had slept with 2000 Women! I did not know there were so many women in the world that had a thing for
*BIG FOOT*
During the second week of my freshman year in college, I came to the horrifying realization that, at a university with 26,000 undergraduates, there was no way I was going to be able to even pursue (let alone achieve) carnal relations with all the ladies who would be leaving school at the end of the year, never to return.
My horror at this realization was partly mitigated by the subsequent understanding that a new crop of underclassmen (and, presumably, underclasswomen) would be arriving the following fall...
(Though I didn't realize it at the time, I had already met my Titania67. We dated exclusively all through college, and married shortly thereafter...so go figure.)
I thought it was 20,000.
I see some influence of the early David Letterman in there. LOL
Your husband is a very canny man.
When I tell "Queeny" that "the peasants around here are revolting!" she simply smiles and says, "I know you are honey, but I love you anyway..."
( Wizard of Id joke )
That's sweet.
Although I looked at the link. Dang, man, I was embarrassed to read it!
What about getting her a kitten? That'd get me every time.
Or play with her hair? Or schedule a massage for you both, and go together?
Or buy her a paint sprayer? Or a new tree? (sometimes practical can be very attractive.)
Or how bout getting her name tattooed across your neck? (haha, before anyone freaks out, that's a joke)
your 2nd item works for me.... ;o)
20,000 Women! What did he do get into all the 3rd world countries too!
17. Mention your upcoming anniversary before she does.
33. Send her very expensive flowers when you screw up.
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