Posted on 03/11/2005 6:46:21 AM PST by pissant
A German who persuaded doctors to give him a second penis has lost his wife after he showed her the result.
Biker Michael Gruber, 40, lost his original penis in a motorbike accident and doctors built him a second one using a mixture of skin, bone and other tissues from his own body.
The penis worked so well that he was even able to father a child with his wife Bianca, 25, and their son Etienne was born last year.
But Gruber was still not happy and asked doctors to repeat the operation and build him a better organ, to which they agreed.
However, before removing the first penis doctors said they needed to make sure the new tissue transplant was a success, and had to leave the first penis in place.
Dr Markus Kuentscher, a plastic surgeon at Berlin's Accident Hospital, said: "We left the old one attached until the new one is properly supplied with blood."
But when Gruber showed his wife his double penis, she went home, packed her bags and left.
From his hospital bed he said: "I've got two penises but no wife, but I am hoping when I get rid of one of the penises I will get her back."
His testicles are intact and will be connected to what is actually his third penis when doctors are happy the operation was a success.
His story was this week featured on a German TV documentary called The Last Penis Operation.
ROFL
Let me guess ...
He named the first one Jose, and the second one Hose B.
I guess getting a second you know what is cheaper than paying a divorce lawyer.
This could end up being some new kind of fad.
Nice to see the Germans are in the foreskin,... I mean forefront of medicine like that.
Remember the old expression "happy as a pup with two peeters"??
Guess it's not all it's cracked up to be, after all.
The value of TRUE communication:
Gruber: Nice work, doctor. Not bad for a first effort.
Dr Kuentscher: Why, thank you very much. We DO try.
Gruber: Yeah, well, here's the thing.......it does the job, but I want one that is bigger, better, stronger. You know....one that doesn't look like a bad science fair project.
Dr Kuentscher: Do ya now.....
Gruber: Well, yeah....I mean, you gave me a pretty good one; now I want another that will strike awe in all who see me naked.
Dr Kuentscher: So you......umm.........want a second one.
Gruber: Yeah, if that's not too greedy....or asking too much of you.
Dr Kuentscher: sigh.......................ok son; it's your body.......you sure you want this???
Gruber: OH yes.
Dr Kuentscher: Not sure what or who you could please outside of Hollywood or certain parts of West Virginia, but.........well.............ok, son. Just remember; two isn't always better than one.......
Gruber: Huh?? ummm.........whatever..........
So much for "In sickness and in health".
Why do people even take vows anymore?
How did you miss this, for your Salacious Ping List???
Gives a whole new meaning to double-dipping
I have been scarce. And therefor so has been the Salacious Ping List. If anyone wants to take it over, they can FReepmail me.
Salacious Posting List Pings!!! Of course this seems more like a "just damn" ping to me.
New required reading in first grade:
"Heather's Dad Has Two Penises"
I wouldn't mind having two penises, as long as I could plug one onto the end of the other, like Lego blocks.
(Not that I would need that...)
Lego blocks, sounds more like an erector set....
Ya'll are gonna love this one!
I'm sure most women would agree that one prick around the house is plenty
Good God almighty. I don't think I'd know what to do with two at - oh, I am NOT going to say it.
[rimshot!]
You sound like my wife!
Actually I probably got that sort of comment from my wife. It's best to say them yourself first, lessens the sting when you hear it in your own voice.
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