ZOT! - show me the jobs

[chris_mueller]

I keep hearing from different people that the economy is getting better but everywhere I go, I cant find any jobs! I been unemployed for about seven months. I was fired from mcdonalds because I couldnt cook very good or fast enough. Ive tried getting jobs in different places. I tried applying for work as a janitor, a waiter, a secretary, a housecleaner, a bricklayer, a carpenter ETC. I cant get anywhere and I dunno why? Where are the jobs? How can I get a job fast? I have a highschool diploma and three years of college. I could really use some help.

[Do not dub me shapka broham]

Believe it or not, there is a television network that's actually planning on making a situation comedy based upon Spaceballs.

[jriemer]

Believe it or not, there is a television network that's actually planning on making a situation comedy based upon Spaceballs.

OH NO!

[Do not dub me shapka broham]

My sentiments, exactly!

:0)

-good times, G.J.P.(Jr.)

[Darksheare]

LOL!

[Mad Dawgg]

"I was fired from mcdonalds because I couldnt cook very good or fast enough. Ive tried getting jobs in different places. I tried applying for work as a janitor, a waiter, a secretary, a housecleaner, a bricklayer, a carpenter ETC. I cant get anywhere and I dunno why? Where are the jobs? How can I get a job fast?"

Formula to increase employment chances =

+

H2O

+

[airborne]

Three years of college and you got fired at McDonalds?

Your parents must be so proud!

I suggest a job in the medical field. You could be a lab rat!

[beckysueb]

I have a highschool diploma and three years of college.

Yeah, right.

[A CA Guy]

I replied in earnest around #28.

[Lijahsbubbe]

Q: How do you make a Teutonic smiley?

[KoRn]

"It's not a Zot till the giant nuke is dropped."

/tips hat

[Do not dub me shapka broham]

I know.

It seemed like pretty sound advice.

I'm not sure if he followed it, though.

[Nataku X]

Admins, there is a new champion for the lamest thread ever. I just dropped $10 for FR.

[Do not dub me shapka broham]

A motley crew of men assemble to execute Lamarr's deadly plan. In a slow pan from right to left across the men, they range from normal cowpokes, to rough-looking backwoodsmen, Nazi stormtroopers, gang members, Hell's Angels, Mexican bandits, Arab terrorists on camels, and white-sheeted Ku Klux Klansmen (with a "Have a Nice Day" smiley face on the back). The men must register to be issued a badge for the assault scheduled for the next day at noon. Hedley reviews the qualifications of one of the applicants:

Lamarr: Qualifications? Applicant: Rape, murder, arson, and rape. Lamarr: You said rape twice. Applicant: (gleefully) I like rape. Lamarr: Charming. Sign right here.

A gum-chewer (Don Megowan) in the line, who has all the proper qualifications ("arson, armed robbery, mayhem") is shot point-blank by Hedley for not sharing. The Waco Kid witnesses the cold-blooded killing: "Boy, is he strict." To get closer to the line and see what's happening, the Waco Kid yells out to the two KKK members in the line: "Hey, boys! Look what I've got here." To entice them to leave the line (so the duo can steal their white robes and hoods), he holds up Bart as bait from behind a large rock, as Bart calls out with a mock-dumb (racially-stereotyped) taunt:

Hey! Where are the white women at?

The two white-sheeted members are quickly subdued off-screen behind the boulder. In a line stolen (and improperly quoted) from the classic film The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948), a Mexican bandit in line rejects his badge during registration: "Badges? We don't need no stinkin' badges!" [The original lines were: "Badges? We ain't got no badges! We don't need no badges. I don't have to show you any stinkin' badges!"]

[NicknamedBob]

"I have a highschool diploma and three years of college." ... Yeah, right.

Hi, Beckysueb! Congratulations on your recent one-year anniversary.

Extrapolating from the available data, it seems to take about a year to grow a thicker skin...

[airborne]

BLAZING SADDLES!

A classic!

[Do not dub me shapka broham]

No question about it.

One of Brooks's finest works.

[airborne]

Number one in my book! But then that's the kind of humor I like.

[airborne]

Young Frankenstein is second.

[Do not dub me shapka broham]

I don't have any particular order of rank, but here are some of my favorites:

1. Blazing Saddles

2. Young Frankenstein

3. Robin Hood, Men In Tights

4. Life Stinks

5. History of the World...

6. The Producers

I'll think of some more, when I'm not quite as tired.

:)

[airborne]

Spaceballs!