T r u i s m s

Williamson Labs ^ | FR Post 1-24-05 | Various

[vannrox]

• The two most abundant things in the universe are Hydrogen and Stupidity. (not necessarily in that order)
• If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
• A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
• He who hesitates is probably right.
• For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
• The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
• No one is listening until you make a mistake.
• Finding a job is easy, if you already have one.
• Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
• To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is Research.
• To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.
• Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
• If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
• The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
• Two wrongs are only the beginning.
• You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. E
• xperience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
• The light at the end of the tunnel is probably the headlight of an approaching train.
• Computer Simulation: Garbage in, Gospel Out!

[vannrox]

LOL

[JimHorn]

If you don't know who you are, a casino is an expensive place to find out.

If you're at a card table, and within five minutes you haven't figured out who the rookie is, it's you.

[TheBigB]

He who laughs last was too dumb to understand the joke.

[GSlob]

Everything is possible [and easy, too] as long as there is somebody else to do it.

[MineralMan]

I've already seen these. Is this news?

[socal_parrot]

nyuck, nyuck, nyuck...

[norraad]

A good listener is the best talker.

[ShadowDancer]

If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

This has been around for eons and for good reason. 99.9% of the time, it is absolutely true.

[peacebaby]

How about these?

What goes around, comes around.

The higher you rise, the harder you fall.

[escapefromboston]

It's not a lie, if you believe it.

George Costanza.

[escapefromboston]

It's not a lie, if you believe it.

George Costanza.

[tx_eggman]

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible. ~George Burns

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. ~Alex Levine

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. ~Will Rogers

[Personal Responsibility]

- An optimist is someone who tells you to cheer up when things are going his way.
- You can't plan for the unexpected...by definition!

[atomicweeder]

Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement.

[peacebaby]

"You're entitled to your opinion, but not to the truth."

Who said this during the last campaign?

[peacebaby]

"Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement."

Boy, have i learned that lesson! Which brings up this one:

I have gained wisdom in the face of adversity.

[highnoon]

"In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language." -- Mark Twain

"Buy land. They've stopped making it." -- Mark Twain

"Sacred cows make the best hamburger." -- Mark Twain

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is still putting on its shoes." -- Mark Twain

"All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure." -- Mark Twain

[Big Horn]

A hard man is good to find.

[peacebaby]

Never trust a man who is breathing hard.

[theDentist]

Beware the articulate, for they are practiced liars.