Are You A Metrosexual: ESPN quiz

ESPN ^ | 09/22/2003 | Sports Nation

[Keyes2000mt]

Are you a man who enjoys shopping, snappy shoes and a crisply starched buttondown? Have you ever frosted your hair or bought a pair of low rise bootcuts? Do you prefer a good martini over a sudsy draft? Get with it hipsters, you may be a metrosexual.

Now, say it with us SportsNation, "ME-TRO-SEKS-YOU-UL."

[Savage Beast]

Oh I could blame it on my wife, I suppose, but I don't do that sort of thing. I take all the credit myself for all my failings and misfortunes.

However, she--fabulous creature that she is!--is highly creative, very artistic, full of helpful suggestions for me, always giving me some new thing--including and especially new ideas, scrupulous honesty, and loving criticism and appraisal--and I--lucky man that I am!--am the beneficiary of all this!

I learned long ago that one of the most fun things I can do is to let her take me to buy my clothes etc. I love the attention! (Talk about a turn on!) She has great ideas. It's like a continuous make-over--only it's my wife, who loves me!

I also like going with her when she shops for clothes. I love it when she comes out with one beautiful outfit after another for my approval or appraisal. But that doesn't work so well. I know nothing about women's fashions, and I wind up wasting her time.

Our home is filled with mirrors. It's very bright and beautiful. It's hard not to look in the mirror frequently.

I have no idea how many shoes I have. I stopped counting after loafers (I don't know how many), patent leather shoes for tux, work boots, running shoes, Birkenstocks, hiking boots (winter and summer), bedroom slippers, army boots, black shoes, brown shoes. Did I mention tennis shoes? Did I say sandals? I'd have to go look to see what else is in there...

I do not consider myself to be metrosexualized--this article or anything else notwithstanding. I hate categories, especially when applied to me! And furthermore, I serve as my own standard of masculinity. What someone else's definition means nothing to me--gold standard that I am!

[John O]

I have a real hard time believing so many of you have as few shoes as you say

It depends. Are they counting the old beat up ones in the back of the closet that just might have one more wearing in them to a social occasion I really don't want to go to but am being forced to attend? I figure I've got a couple pair of those. Not counting sneakers I have one pair of shoes. Change that, forgot my hiking boots. (Do baseball cleats count as sneakers? what about golf shoes?)

My wife on the other hand is an Imelda Marcos wannabe

[xsmommy]

hot dog, ain't you a dang prize? ; )

[Eala]

Unfair! My three pair of sneakers (ratty-yard-work, weekend wear, reserve pair bought in a 2-fer-1 special) already put me in range of the "correct" answer on shoes. Add my "chop wood" 30-year-old dog-chewed engineer boots and I'm there... and that's before you count the walkers I wear to work (changing to sandals once there), the no-metal-at-all slipons for passing through airline metal detectors, the kayak sandals, the dress shoes for church, the dress Highland ghillie brogues and the heavy-duty band parade shoes....

Other than that I would have had a perfect score of zero.

[LisaMalia]

Give me a good 'ole "0" anytime!!!!!!

[Fudd]

Savage Beast scored an 8, but forgot to deduct three points for his un-metro screen name.

5 correct: ESPN can't count.

[cyborg]

As if you have nothing else to do... was just curious as to how negative your score could get...

[PoisedWoman]

This is fun. I invaded the online men's locker room to vote and came up with a 9. I'm here to tell you that grrrrrrrrls are natural metrosexuals.

[fiscally_right]

I scored pretty high too :-/ I'm young though, I have to be hip!

[Savage Beast]

You bet!

[Moleman]

I scored three, guess I have potential. I do like martini's but not because Im metro, probably because im an old drunk. Also like mechanical watches such as Rolex.

[Choose Ye This Day]

I got a zero as well. Not too stylin'.

I thought the "how many shoes do you own" question also should have specifically excluded work boots.

Also, my wife cuts my hair for free, but she's my best buddy, so that counts.

[thoughtomator]

Apparently I'm a lost cause. But I do in fact believe eyebrows should be two separate entities. And I am currently reading All Quiet on the Western Front.

[NeoCaveman]

Fun test.

You answered 1 question correctly out of a possible 12 questions.

[BelieveNFreedom]

Hey, I protest getting a point for re-reading a classic. Raymond Chandler is classic, right?

[John Will]

Heh, 0 points oh Yeah.

[xp38]

No. Next time try Mickey Spillane.

[JSloth]

Big, fat "0"...I think that means I'm old and boring?

[zzen01]

I scored 0!

[TotusTuus]

But I do in fact believe eyebrows should be two separate entities.

Without a little clipping, for some of us they might become one.

In any event, I scored a 0.