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Posted on 07/11/2026 4:02:54 AM PDT by DFG
SACRAMENTO, CA — Following reports that activists were pushing the introduction of Black English in California preschools, Governor Gavin Newsom proudly proclaimed: "We finna teach da' homies Black English, yo!"
The California governor confirmed that he has many black friends and, as such, wanted to make Black English a centerpiece to every child's educational experience. "Because we want every child to learn to communicate with our black brothers and sisters, ya dig?" he said.
California Department of Education officials were initially hesitant to add Black English to the preschool curriculum, but completely caved once Newsom showed how fluent he was in Ebonics.
"I grew up in a po' black neighborhood, an' I know exactly what it mean to be a slave, dat's why we all gotta speak jive," Newsom said. "I'm totally like y'all, man, fo' real. I ain't rich, I'm a erryday governor just tryna make ends meet."
At publishing time, California's ranking in English test scores dropped to the lowest in the nation, even lower than that of rural West Virginia.
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Almost got stung.
Sounds just like something that idiot would do to drag society down even further than it already is.
Woont dat be raciss?
Now he wants to make it harder for them to become employed.....ifn dey caint speaks da langige, how dey gonna does dere jobs?
I started to take this seriously — because it actually is believable. Then ... 🐝
You have to cup your hand a swing your arm for the jive effect as you use Black English ?.
If in a car use the Detriot lean when using it ?.
“”SACRAMENTO, CA — Following reports that activists were pushing the introduction of Black English in California preschools, Governor Gavin Newsom proudly proclaimed: “We finna teach da’ homies Black English, yo!”””
***
While satire, this is actually reality-based. Newscum will just naturally go along with this initiative, since he is a card-carrying leftist willing to do and say ANYthing that will get him elected. In ultra-woke California, this just might do the trick for him, despite the fact that blacks make up only around 6% of California’s population.
The irony is, of course, that the educational system in California would be much better served if they focused on teaching ENGLISH to students there, instead of other leftist-based idiocy. But then, that would be way too logical.... and therefore, non-leftist thinking. Nevermind.
“Leftist California group pushes to add ‘Black English’ to schools’ multilingual education program
Black Californians United for Early Care and Education (BlackECE) is a “collaborative partnership of organizations committed to advancing language justice for Black children in early childhood education.” Those groups include Californians Together, Catalyst California and Early Edge.”
https://www.yahoo.com/news/politics/articles/leftist-california-group-pushes-add-152445873.html
Shhhhhitt, yu mofo be talkin’ smack.
Paging Barbara Billingsley!
They got me! I immediately thought of the “Spanglish” movement years ago
Esperano?
Everyone will be amazed at the MSM-led rehabilitation of Newsom that is going to take place in 2027, after he leaves office. By the time the primaries start, he will be universally portrayed as a flag-wrapped superhero.
I’m half way through, and then I check. The Bee stung me again.
Daily Mail, July, 7th 2026:
Woke activists push for 'Black English' to be taught in Democrat state's preschools to combat 'harmful language hierarchies'
"Supporters say teaching the dialect, also known as African American English (AAE) or African American Vernacular English (AAVE), will help 'combat harmful language hierarchies.'"
https://www.dailymail.com/news/article-15959653/california-black-english-taught-preschool-ashley-williams.html
I'm sure employers will fall all over one another - well, those few that are left in California, when a resume comes in written in black English.
1) I am shocked that the Bee would satirize a serious educational action like this.
2) Oh No U Di'n't!!!
Shouldnt the language be Swahili ???
WHAT JOBS?????
NONE OF THEM WANT TO ACTUALLY WORK——
“Y’all fidna gestroy da Erf!”
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