VIDEO: Graham Platner Problems Overshadowed by Democrat Squat Cobbler Scandal

Rumble ^ | July 7, 2026 | DUmmie FUnnies

[PJ-Comix]

VIDEO

Good news for Graham Platner! All the outrage over his many scandals is about to be forgotten. Why? Because a new scandal has emerged from a Democrat politician in New Mexico, Daniel Wormald, who apparently is a candidate for mayor of Albuquerque that is so horrific and disgusting that folks will soon forget about the Platner scandals which pale in comparison. As a result, Platner should definitely stick it out as a candidate for the U.S. Senate from Maine at least until July 13 (5:01 PM EDT to be exact).

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TOPICS: Humor; Politics; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: bleachboy; danielwormald; grahamplatner; portaplatner; rokhanna

[PJ-Comix]

Nothing is lower than being a Squat Cobbler fetishist. It is so horrific that it completely wipes away all outrage over the Graham Platner scandals (hopefully at least until July 13).

[PJ-Comix]

PING!

[Steely Tom]

Could be a path forward for the Cracker.

[Leaning Right]

This reminds me of the time I needed to hire a key employee for my business. Only three people applied: a tranny, a squat cobbler, and a tattooed Nazi.

My way forward was clear. Sell the business and go fishing.

[frank ballenger]

Photo....

Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day.

Teach a man to fish and he’ll sit in his boat all day drinking.

[No name given]

Preferably to prison where Graham belongs.

[rktman]

These days, nothing is “off the table” with democommies.

[Tell It Right]

Squat Cobbler fetishist

Is this something I don't want to research?

[PJ-Comix]

Is this something I don't want to research?

Better Call Saul and ask him.

[Responsibility2nd]

https://share.google/BpQB3NaW6rgDkLZGv

Squat Cobbler

[Nateman]

It is a made up fetish from the Breaking Bad series.

[E. Pluribus Unum]

Squat Cobbler is a fictional fetish term invented for the TV series Better Call Saul, specifically in the Season 2 episode "Cobbler." It describes a sexual act where a fully clothed or costumed man sits in a pie and wiggles around, often for the purpose of creating fetish videos

Video Transcript Summary

This is a satirical, over-the-top rant claiming that Graham Plattner’s scandals will be completely forgotten due to an even more shocking and disgusting scandal involving Democrat Daniel Wormald (a New Mexico politician, possibly running for mayor of Albuquerque).Core claim:A newly surfaced video shows Wormald engaging in an extremely revolting fetish called “squat cobbler” (also referred to as “Hoboken squat cobbler”). The speaker describes it as so horrifying and gross that it will eclipse any outrage over Plattner, effectively giving Plattner a free pass to continue his Senate run in Maine.Tone and content:

• The speaker pretends to be disgusted while dramatically building up the scandal.
• They “show” the video by reading a absurd, deliberately gross and comedic monologue of someone fetishistically interacting with a fresh pie (smelling it, examining it, then having an accident involving “filling”/“berries” all over the room).
• After the gross-out segment, the speaker mocks critics (especially liberals/Democrats) for sudden moral outrage, tells them to “shut the fuck up,” and says it’s an internal Democrat issue.
• Ends with sarcastic advice to Plattner to “stick it out” until at least July 13th, plus plugs for “Better Call Saul” and “Dummy Funnies.”

Overall: It’s crude political humor/satire using exaggeration and shock value to mock scandal fatigue, selective outrage, and partisan hypocrisy. The “squat cobbler” video is played for maximum gross-out comedy effect.

[Blurb2350]

I researched it for you. “Let us explain it for you. In the second episode of the second season of AMC’s Better Call Saul viewers learned a new phrase: Squat Cobbler. What? You mean you don’t know what that is? You don’t know the definition? As Bob Odenkirk’s character Saul Goodman (AKA Jimmy McGill) explains: It’s when a man sits in pie. He sits in a pie. Then he wiggles around.”

[PJ-Comix]

WOW! You must be really “FUN” at parties.

[PJ-Comix]

IT'S WORKING!!! Graham Platner is sticking it out. Apparently he realizes the New Mexico Squat Cobbler scandal is so horrific that his own scandals pale in comparison.

NYP: Graham Platner is refusing to drop out of the Senate race unless he gets to name successor

A source familiar with the campaign discussions said Platner, his campaign and political strategist Morris Katz are deliberating about the Maine Democrat dropping out but only if his…— Politics & Poll Tracker 📡 (@PollTracker2024) July 7, 2026

[E. Pluribus Unum]

WOW! You must be really “FUN” at parties.

Nobody knows WTF you're talking about. You are a legend in your own mind.

PS: Stupid ≠ Funny

[Tell It Right]

Got it. A food fetish.

Not that anyone criticizing him has utilized chocolate syrup or whipped cream or anything... LOL

[PJ-Comix]

You are a legend in your own mind.

Ooof! The originality of that slight has totally devastated me. I shall laminate it and keep it in my wallet for all eternity as a rebuke to all that I am.

[Pontiac]

It once was fictional.

By now it has its own websites with 30,000 followers and at least 1 FBI agent watching the site.

[Fledermaus]

I guess it’s better than Jason Biggs in American Pie!