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Dems Edge Closer to Civil War [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 26 October 2025 | John Semmens

Posted on 10/25/2025 1:24:39 AM PDT by John Semmens

In California, US Rep. Robert Garcia announced that "the House Democrats on the Oversight Committee are establishing a 'Master ICE Tracker' that will help our Antifa street fighters locate where immigrants are being arrested and allow them to intervene and prevent the deportation of the folks invited into our country by former President Biden." Apple and Facebook have removed similar ICE trackers from their platforms lest they be held liable for damages in any violent confrontations enabled by their ICE trackers.

Garcia explained his strategy, saying "with the government shutdown there is no money to pay the ICE agents that are harassing our Party's voters. It's one thing to face down a crowd that is ramming your vehicles, throwing stuff, cursing and spitting on you when you are being paid. When paychecks aren't coming the risk of bodily injury or death could reach intolerable levels and provoke the ICE officers go on strike."

Former House Speaker Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) and Rep. Kevin Mullin (D-Calif) warned that "ICE officers who carry out raids in our sanctuary state will be arrested and tried under California's sanctuary laws. Trump will be unable to pardon them for violating these state laws. The convicted ICE officers will rot in state prisons for 'just following orders' to enforce Trump's fascist policies."

US Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche responded with a letter warning them to "stand down or face prosecution. We urge you and other California officials to publicly abandon this criminal conspiracy, to stop threatening law enforcement, and to prioritize the safety of your citizens. No one threatens our agents. No one will stop us from Making America Safe Again."

In Illinois, State Representative Margaret Croke sent out an email listing detailed descriptions of vehicles belonging to ICE agents operating in Chicago neighborhoods. This includes make, model, color, and partial license plate info for cars believed to belong to ICE agents working in the area. Former Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot says she "is heading up a similar effort to identify federal immigration agents so it will be easier for residents to know who and where their enemies are and attack them."

In Washington, DC, Senate Minority Leader Charles Schumer (D-NY) gloated over his Party's recent success in "repelling the Republicans' attempt to get funding to pay essential government employees during the shutdown. The attempt to pay the so-called essential workers is a ploy to deny paying the non-essential workers. These folks are a core constituency of the Democratic Party. Ninety percent of them vote Democrat. We consider keeping them on the federal payroll essential. As long as we Democrats hang together the Republicans will run out of options and have to give in to our demands."

In Louisiana, James Carville, the brains behind former President Bill Clinton's 1992 winning campaign slogan "it's the economy, stupid," told Al Hunt on his "Politics War Room" podcast that he "fantasizes about having Trump's collaborators having their heads shaved. Being put in orange pajamas, and marched down Pennsylvania Avenue while people are invited to spit on them. That's what they did to the Nazi collaborators in France after World War II. Later some of them went to prison and were hanged. Others were permanently barred from ever serving in government again. That's what Democrats should do to Republicans after we win the 2028 presidential election."

In related news, an anonymous person has given the Department of War $130 million to help pay for some military salaries during the government shutdown. Schumer scoffed at the donation calling it "far short of what is needed to fully compensate the troops. It shows that we have Trump by the short hairs. When Democrats retake the majority in Congress in the 2026 elections we will find out who made this donation along with any others who may dare to emulate him and punish all of them just like we punished the January 6 insurrectionists."


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: antifa; california; carville; ice; illinois; immigrants; pelosi; satire; schumer

1 posted on 10/25/2025 1:24:39 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: 1of10; #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 21twelve; 1raider1; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 3D-JOY; 43north; ...

ping


2 posted on 10/25/2025 1:27:14 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

A civil war is inevitable. The Left is losing and they won’t go quietly. They seek bloodshed.


3 posted on 10/25/2025 1:58:22 AM PDT by Gnome1949
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To: John Semmens

Cool! Our side has 14 trillion bullets. Their side doesn’t know which bathroom to use.


4 posted on 10/25/2025 2:08:25 AM PDT by know.your.why
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To: John Semmens

Thanks, but it gets more and more confusing. The Democrats are so weird that even BabyloonBee gets closer and closer to what’s really going on. Scary!


5 posted on 10/25/2025 2:22:59 AM PDT by ScaniaBoy (Part of the Right Wing Research & Attack Machine)
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To: John Semmens

I personally dont buy this all out civil war BS. I do see random psychos acting out from dem sponsored rhetoric...but an all out civil war? Aint gonna happen. WTF the dems going to go to war over? They already got their asses kicked in 1869 all because they wanted free labor from black slaves. They got nothing now and their party is in shambles. They cant win diddly by force. Nada! Only way they get to achieve any sort of relevance is to listen to the American citizen..but that goes against their MO. Effem.


6 posted on 10/25/2025 2:23:21 AM PDT by know.your.why
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To: John Semmens

Anyone know what this is about?

Masked men with cameras provoking people in Spanaway
https://youtu.be/b9cmuIc3_Z0


7 posted on 10/25/2025 2:56:56 AM PDT by ansel12 ((NATO warrior under Reagan, and RA under Nixon, bemoaning the pro-Russians from Vietnam to Ukraine.))
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To: John Semmens

Trump better stop acting like he has all the time in the world to punish the left. Take the gloves off NOW and start treating them like the threat that they really are. If/when the left takes back power they don’t just threaten, they act. They will arrest republicans. They will put republicans in jail. Does Trump think they won’t go after him again cause he sure is acting that way.


8 posted on 10/25/2025 3:05:53 AM PDT by hillarys cankles
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To: know.your.why

I see only one side using violence and getting away with it.


9 posted on 10/25/2025 3:07:27 AM PDT by hillarys cankles
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To: Gnome1949

I’ll gladly shed some leftist communist blood and that of any of their supporters if called upon to do so. If that’s what it takes to save our country.


10 posted on 10/25/2025 3:18:38 AM PDT by TermLimits4All ("If you stand for nothing, you'll fall for anything.")
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To: hillarys cankles
...only one side using violence...

This "side" that you speak of are relatively small groups of mob-mentality degenerates. Democrat district judges. They are a tiny minority compared to the overwhelming majority of conservative US citizens. There are no states that have a majority population that is going to agree to secede and form their own militarized army and go to war with the Union and have a civil war. What is most likely to happen is the Democrat party will finally admit that it is fundamentally dysfunctional and then they will "restructure" into a different party that more agrees with common sense ideology like closed borders and voter ID etc. They will do this or die. The woke movement is essentially dead already. Huge democrat cities like Chicago, LA, Portland are socially collapsing into crime ridden drug-apocalypses that cannot survive much longer. The Dem party is finished unless they completely change. IMHO.
11 posted on 10/25/2025 4:02:27 AM PDT by know.your.why
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To: know.your.why

democrats will go after the most vulnerable first, your children in schools,your loved ones in hospitals and nursing homes. Soft targets and grocery stores. Snipers on roads and drive by shootings. Busses, trains, and cargo vehicles. A typical Chicago weekend. democrats will make Hamas proud. I’m not kidding. When hell is unleashed, Quiet, live and leave me and my family alone men and women will forget their humanity and vengeance will be a way of life. I’ve seen footage of Ukrainian soldiers using sledge hammers on captured Russian soldiers, and Patriots don’t fight for themselves, they fight to protect their family and vengeance for the loved ones they have lost. There will be no mercy. Ever.


12 posted on 10/25/2025 4:40:19 AM PDT by Ponyexpress9790 (Every one that votes democrat is your enemy, there is no co-existing with traitors and terrorists. )
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To: ScaniaBoy

Satire is practically impossible these days, BEE did a great video on this


13 posted on 10/25/2025 5:34:34 AM PDT by blitz128
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To: John Semmens

Are the semi satire sites to be taken seriously?


14 posted on 10/25/2025 6:49:10 AM PDT by roving
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To: John Semmens

It’s too bad that secession is not an option for Kommiefornia.


15 posted on 10/25/2025 7:20:54 AM PDT by smokingfrog ( sleep with one eye open (<o> --- )
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To: Gnome1949

See my tagline.

L


16 posted on 10/25/2025 7:29:33 AM PDT by Lurker ( Peaceful coexistence with the Left is not possible. Stop pretending that it is.)
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To: John Semmens
This article is about attacking ICE. The reason Demonrats desperately need illegal aliens is because they murder their progeny. They are losing population and apportionment. They are losing power and opportunities for grift and graft. Cheating in elections is getting harder.

Just imagine if Christian/Consercative women didn't birth control-abortiface their own children at a slightly slower pace?

We'd have turned America around three generations ago!

17 posted on 10/25/2025 8:17:38 AM PDT by Theophilus (covfefe)
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To: John Semmens

FUNNY:

CALIF WANTS TO”TRACK ICE”-—

BUT THEY LET ILLEGAL “TRUCKERS” ALL OVER THE ROADS.


18 posted on 10/25/2025 10:32:13 AM PDT by ridesthemiles (not giving up on TRUMP---EVER)
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To: roving

They are basically factual, but slightly modified for clarity.


19 posted on 10/25/2025 11:03:46 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: Gnome1949

This reminds me of the Kent State shootings, on May 4, 1970. The National Guard had been chased by a mob. The guard was armed with M1-Garands. The guard had retreated as they did not want a confrontation that required shooting the mob. When cornered the order was given to shoot. They had no choice. The Garands did their job. This shooting became a propaganda success in extreme for the left’s anti Vietnam War faction.

Today I think the left wants a repeat performance for propaganda purposes. The death of a few leftists mean nothing to their leadership. The leadership is truly trying to make this happen. The mob thinks of law enforcement as Nazi Brownshirts and SS thus killing them is a noble act. As Stalin said, “Useful idiots.”


20 posted on 10/25/2025 11:09:20 AM PDT by cpdiii (cane cutter, deckhand, oilfield roughneck, drilling fluid tech, geologist, pilot, pharmacist, MAGA)
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