Posted on 06/25/2025 8:46:33 AM PDT by DFG
NEW YORK — The Hamas terrorist organization has claimed responsibility for the results of last night's mayoral primary in New York City.
"Our glorious freedom fighters have delivered an attack on New York City that the Great Satan will not soon forget," stated Hamas spokesman Abu Obaida. "We take responsibility for the heroic operation that has begun the city's deliverance to Allah. The intifada has been globalized."
Hamas went on to state that last night's primary was the first wave of assaults directed at destroying American cities and paving the way for attacks on the Jewish community. "We shall make New York City crumble," said Obaida, waving his AK-47. "Hamas will unleash government-controlled grocery stores, free injection sites, and many other powerful assaults. No one will be able to withstand us, Allah be praised!"
At publishing time, Hamas had also claimed responsibility for the Tucker Carlson podcast.
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Thank you very much and God bless you.
Somehow this time I ain’t laughing and I usually like dark humour.
A lot of truth to this one.
LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!
He’ll move Hamas to NYC
Gotta give the Bee credit, quite a good satire topic.
I totally believed this.
Diversity is our strength.
Well done NYC! You elected a terrorist supporter. Never underestimate the STUPIDITY of NYC voters.
Right. I see no humor. When the Bee does ones about child molesters, rapists or the Holocaust I don’t laugh.
Hamas and others are trying to subvert the West including taking over cities such as New York. The candidate refused three times to condemn the Holocaust. He appeals to Communist and Socialist New Yorkers and to ones across the country.
A case of “It Can’t Happen Here” coming to New York.
All the FReepers who attacked me for blaming THE VOTERS in NY and CA and other places for allowing the enemies to take power and just going along with everyday life, may reconsider.
“Diversity is our strength.”
Diversity is our doom.
Fixed it.
(Yeah, I know its the Bee)
Supposedly a joke, but the only counter-factual detail is the official announcement by Hamas.
Mamdani and his Uganda/India/Muslim, suddenly turned Columbia/Hollywood elite American leftist family, scream “MI6/CIA/Davos/NGO cut-out.”
This guy looks like Obama deep-state hologram 2.0.
I’m not laughing at this. Mom and Dad lost a few people on 9/11. I guess Never Forgot, has been forgotten!!
On point. Not all satire is written to evoke a humorous response. Sometimes it is written like a punch to the gut to wake people up. Unfortunately, most New Yorkers drank the kool aid (obviously) and are unable (or unwilling) to respond.
Great piece
Hope it's not too late. If MandamnMe wins, “There's a problem, Houston”.
True.
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