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Mexico Wants to Protect Drug Cartels [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 23 Feb 2025 | John Semmens

Posted on 02/25/2025 9:20:53 AM PST by John Semmens

Mexico's President Claudia Sheinbaum has taken the first steps to amend her country's constitution. "Initially I thought the idea of cooperating with the United States in its quest to reduce the quantity of drugs being smuggled over the border would improve our relationship with our neighbor to the north," she said. "But after considering all of the aspects of what this might mean, I'm not so sure it's a good idea."

"For one thing, exporting drugs to the US boosts our economy," she pointed out. "Is President Trump going to compensate us for the loss of this revenue if we help put the cartels out of business like he wants? I doubt it. He only cares about his country and its prosperity. He wants to put tariffs on the cars we export to the US. This also hurts our economy. He wants to send Mexican immigrants back here instead of welcoming and taking care of them like President Biden did. He calls the people who work for the cartels 'murderous thugs.' But they only murder people who threaten their business interests."

"Here is the constitution revision that I propose," she said. "Any members of any of our cartels that are caught in the United States can be prosecuted under the laws of the United States. Members of any cartel that reside in Mexico will enjoy the full protection of our laws. Any US troops or law-enforcement officers who are caught in Mexico harassing any Mexican cartel member will enjoy the full penalties available under our laws--including no bail imprisonment until we can get around to holding a trial for them."


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: cashflow; exports; postandrun; satire; selfpromotion; sovereignty

1 posted on 02/25/2025 9:20:53 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Their economy will not be boosted by a SEAL team excursion.


2 posted on 02/25/2025 9:34:30 AM PST by exnavy (See article IV section 4 of our constitution.)
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To: John Semmens

Without money taken and stolen from the U.S. Taxpayers, Mexico would be at the bottom of the list of third world crap holes.


3 posted on 02/25/2025 9:40:47 AM PST by FlingWingFlyer (The U.S. Government was not created to be a jobs program. )
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To: exnavy

We are gonna have to go in full bore.

Limited actions no matter how covert are not going to hack it.

Much as I hate to say it.

This could end up being much like Vietnam.


4 posted on 02/25/2025 10:15:31 AM PST by crz
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