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Second-Grader Suspended For Misgendering An M&M
Babylon Bee ^ | 01/18/2023 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 01/18/2023 3:43:17 PM PST by DFG

ST PAUL, MN — Local second grader Tim Bumbly has been suspended from Rosa Parks 1619 Obama Elementary for repeatedly misgendering one of the M&M's candies he received in his lunch.

"After multiple warnings, Timmy continued to refer to his green and purple M&M's as 'they' and 'them', when Mars, Inc. has already confirmed they are strong, independent women," said Tim's teacher Franz Zenber (she/her). "For the safety of our student body, we had to remove him from the school as soon as possible. Misgendering kills."

The school board and superintendent backed the decision, confirming the student will be suspended for a period of two weeks and will be allowed to return to classes pending a lengthy round of inclusivity training and testing.

Several parents, however, are outraged by the school's decision. "We understand Timmy's offense was despicable. Misgendering kills, after all. But we feel this punishment is too severe," said one parent in the pick-up line outside the school. The parent has since been reported to the DOJ.

At publishing time, Timmy was allowed to return to school early on good behavior after joining the GSA club in his school.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 1619; babylonbee; mars; misgender; mm

1 posted on 01/18/2023 3:43:17 PM PST by DFG
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To: DFG

M&M’s should melt in your mouth, not in the glands.


2 posted on 01/18/2023 4:04:55 PM PST by Tell It Right (1st Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: DFG
This is what our "educators" are wasting our children's time with. The whole system needs to be shot and buried, never to return.

School Choice -- period.

I know this is a problem; but, no one ever mentions the "teaching colleges" in Universities. What are they "teaching" if this is the low quality of teacher that they are producing.

3 posted on 01/18/2023 4:06:43 PM PST by LibertarianLiz
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To: LibertarianLiz

You know this is satire, right?


4 posted on 01/18/2023 4:08:42 PM PST by Mr. Lucky (It's worth noting that this debate about ttyl)
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To: DFG

5 posted on 01/18/2023 4:16:39 PM PST by Delta 21 (MAGA Republican is my pronoun.)
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To: Mr. Lucky

I totally agree with her!


6 posted on 01/18/2023 4:17:58 PM PST by Delta 21 (MAGA Republican is my pronoun.)
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To: DFG

Almost had me... 😂


7 posted on 01/18/2023 4:19:59 PM PST by Magnum44 (...against all enemies, foreign and domestic... )
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To: DFG

The bee shows the insanity that reigns in schools.


8 posted on 01/18/2023 4:33:47 PM PST by I want the USA back (News media are pond scum. My pronouns: Haha, heehee, hoho. )
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To: DFG

They are gay and lesbian...

You take one out and it might read M&M (Man & Man)

You take another one out and it might read W&W (Woman & Woman)


9 posted on 01/18/2023 4:48:52 PM PST by JBW1949 (I'm really PC.....Patriotically Correct)
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To: DFG
When I read...and wince....I check for Stingers.

The BEE is soooo good....

10 posted on 01/18/2023 5:08:42 PM PST by Sacajaweau ( )
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To: JBW1949

You just turn the first one upside down. No wonder we’re confused.


11 posted on 01/18/2023 5:10:05 PM PST by Sacajaweau ( )
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To: Sacajaweau

But I have never seen a M&W (Man & Woman)....*sigh*


12 posted on 01/18/2023 5:17:59 PM PST by JBW1949 (I'm really PC.....Patriotically Correct)
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To: DFG

Just wait til you see what they do to those little hearts on Valentine’s Day!


13 posted on 01/18/2023 5:28:52 PM PST by bigbob (p)
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To: DFG
Rosa Parks 1619 Obama Elementary

Sorry, Bee, if you had picked any one of those I would have continued my headline inspired rage for a couple more paragraphs. All three moved it from satire to farce.

14 posted on 01/18/2023 6:06:58 PM PST by KarlInOhio (Soon the January 6 protesters will be held (without trial or bail) longer than Jefferson Davis was.)
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To: Mr. Lucky
Oh, for heaven's sake! I really should know, by now, to check the source.

In my defense, reality and satire are now very difficult to separate in our current society.

15 posted on 01/19/2023 8:32:58 AM PST by LibertarianLiz
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To: LibertarianLiz

If it makes a little bit of sense, it’s probably satire. If it makes no sense at all, it’s probably real.


16 posted on 01/19/2023 9:23:36 AM PST by Mr. Lucky (It's worth noting that this debate about ttyl)
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