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End of Oil & Gas Within Reach [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 11 September 2022 | John Semmens

Posted on 09/10/2022 10:17:07 AM PDT by John Semmens

This week, Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen predicted that “the Inflation Reduction Act will put us on our way toward a future where we totally depend on the wind, the sun and other clean sources of energy. We will free ourselves from our dependence on fossil fuels.”

Department of Energy Secretary Jennifer Granholm echoed Yellen’s remarks and cited “the tremendous progress being made in California under Governor Gavin Newsom’s leadership. He’s got his state on track to outlaw gasoline-powered cars by 2035. He’s pushing to wean the state off coal- and gas-fueled electricity generation and going all wind and solar. I wouldn’t be surprised if this visionary man becomes our next president.”

Granholm brushed off California’s energy difficulties, calling them “growing pains.” These pains include electric rates that have risen three times faster than in the rest of the nation and frequent blackouts. In just the last week, California owners of electric vehicles (EVs) were admonished to not recharge them during periods of peak-electricity demand (typically weekdays 5 pm to 9 pm).

“As we have said many times before, transitioning to a greener economy will require sacrifices,” Granholm said. “Higher energy prices will encourage more conservation. If it costs more to keep the lights on we can counter this by returning to a more natural lifestyle of rising at sunrise and going to sleep at sundown. In addition, a parked EV is more environmentally friendly than a moving EV.”

Meanwhile, the Swiss government has decreed that homeowners who set their thermostats higher than 66° during the winter will be fined up to $3,000 per violation and/or imprisoned for up to three years. Granholm called these penalties “harsh, but potentially effective. My Department will be monitoring events in Switzerland to determine whether any similar steps ought to be taken here.”

Further, the Biden Administration has drawn down our strategic petroleum reserves to their lowest level in 40 years—an action that Granholm insisted “is an essential ‘bridge-burning’ step to help speed our transition to a greener America. The sooner sources of petroleum are eliminated, the sooner people will have to adapt to a new way of life. The longer the ‘crutch’ of hopping into your gas-guzzling car and tooling off to wherever you want to go, the harder it will be to achieve the green dream.”

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://libertyusa21.wordpress.com/semi-news-semi-satire/


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: california; granholm; greendream; newsom; satire; switzerland; thermostats; yellen
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1 posted on 09/10/2022 10:17:07 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
End of Oil & Gas THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT Within Reach

Just a few decades away in my estimation.

2 posted on 09/10/2022 10:19:37 AM PDT by Jim W N (MAGA by restoring the Gospel of the Grace of Christ (Jude 3) and our Free Constitutional Republic!)
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To: John Semmens

The real Amish will make a fortune teaching the entire country how to survive


3 posted on 09/10/2022 10:24:28 AM PDT by Rural_Michigan
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To: John Semmens

Where’s the satire? This looks like straight reporting to me.


4 posted on 09/10/2022 10:26:41 AM PDT by Lazamataz (The firearms I own today, are the firearms I will die with. How I die will be up to them.)
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To: John Semmens

Partial list of EV parts made from oil:

Paint
Dashboard computer display panel
Window insulation
Fender wells
Tires, 36 of them every 300k miles.
Wiring insulation
Headliners
Seat covers
Carpet
door panels
dashboards
Bumpers
Headlight/taillight covers


5 posted on 09/10/2022 10:31:49 AM PDT by SaxxonWoods (The only way to secure your own future is to create it yourself.)
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To: Rural_Michigan
Ancestor of mine. He had a dairy cow and used the buggy to deliver milk.


6 posted on 09/10/2022 10:35:06 AM PDT by Pollard (Worm Free PureBlood)
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To: John Semmens
She cannot not know that "the end of oil and gas" is a black-and-white recipe for national disaster.

How does she live with herself, telling such a lie?

7 posted on 09/10/2022 10:37:43 AM PDT by Chad C. Mulligan
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To: John Semmens

The best thing that the world can do is to practice conservation. It is a finite resource. We burn it faster than it is behind created.


8 posted on 09/10/2022 10:46:38 AM PDT by crusty old prospector
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To: SaxxonWoods

FReeper Liz posted this yesterday for a few more allegedly useful items from the well:

“A partial list of products made from Petroleum (144 of 6000 items)

This list came from a print publication in 1974. In fact, since 1974 there have been hundreds of additional items replaced with plastic duplicates, medical syringes for example. So should you wish to find the complete list of products made from petroleum you will most likely have to compose it yourself.

One 42-gallon barrel of oil creates 19.4 gallons of gasoline. The rest (over half) is used to make things like:

Solvents Diesel fuel Motor Oil Bearing Grease
Ink Floor Wax Ballpoint Pens Football Cleats
Upholstery Sweaters Boats Insecticides
Bicycle Tires Sports Car Bodies Nail Polish Fishing lures
Dresses Tires Golf Bags Perfumes
Cassettes Dishwasher parts Tool Boxes Shoe Polish
Motorcycle Helmet Caulking Petroleum Jelly Transparent Tape
CD Player Faucet Washers Antiseptics Clothesline
Curtains Food Preservatives Basketballs Soap
Vitamin Capsules Antihistamines Purses Shoes
Dashboards Cortisone Deodorant Shoelace Aglets
Putty Dyes Panty Hose Refrigerant
Percolators Life Jackets Rubbing Alcohol Linings
Skis TV Cabinets Shag Rugs Electrician’s Tape
Tool Racks Car Battery Cases Epoxy Paint
Mops Slacks Insect Repellent Oil Filters
Umbrellas Yarn Fertilizers Hair Coloring
Roofing Toilet Seats Fishing Rods Lipstick
Denture Adhesive Linoleum Ice Cube Trays Synthetic Rubber
Speakers Plastic Wood Electric Blankets Glycerin
Tennis Rackets Rubber Cement Fishing Boots Dice
Nylon Rope Candles Trash Bags House Paint
Water Pipes Hand Lotion Roller Skates Surf Boards
Shampoo Wheels Paint Rollers Shower Curtains
Guitar Strings Luggage Aspirin Safety Glasses
Antifreeze Football Helmets Awnings Eyeglasses
Clothes Toothbrushes Ice Chests Footballs
Combs CD’s & DVD’s Paint Brushes Detergents
Vaporizers Balloons Sun Glasses Tents
Heart Valves Crayons Parachutes Telephones
Enamel Pillows Dishes Cameras
Anesthetics Artificial Turf Artificial limbs Bandages
Dentures Model Cars Folding Doors Hair Curlers
Cold cream Movie film Contact lenses Drinking Cups
Fan Belts Car Enamel Shaving Cream Ammonia
Refrigerators Golf Balls Toothpaste Gasoline”


9 posted on 09/10/2022 10:48:44 AM PDT by rktman (Destroy America from within? Check! WTH? Enlisted USN 1967 to end up with this? 😕)
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To: All

A buck or two along the way would help the freepathon.

https://freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/4092307/posts


10 posted on 09/10/2022 10:49:08 AM PDT by deport
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To: crusty old prospector
It is a finite resource. We burn it faster than it is behind created.

Leftist doctrine of fear used to enslave the world.

The truth is God made this world RICH with resources meant to sustain man for eternity.

It's the truth of Biblical faith vs. the lies of the satanic Left.

11 posted on 09/10/2022 10:52:21 AM PDT by Jim W N (MAGA by restoring the Gospel of the Grace of Christ (Jude 3) and our Free Constitutional Republic!)
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To: rktman

Thanks, I saved that one earlier!


12 posted on 09/10/2022 11:04:50 AM PDT by SaxxonWoods (The only way to secure your own future is to create it yourself.)
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To: SaxxonWoods

Okay. I’m sure there is an updated list but haven’t gone hunting for it yet.


13 posted on 09/10/2022 11:06:00 AM PDT by rktman (Destroy America from within? Check! WTH? Enlisted USN 1967 to end up with this? 😕)
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To: Jim W N

I thought she said RID ourselves of fossil fuels. Can they come any dumber than this person who is one of our RULERS?


14 posted on 09/10/2022 11:06:06 AM PDT by Greenidgypsy (Keep on Trumpin….)
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To: John Semmens

Hallelujah! We are almost there! No more oil and gas and coal etc.! and concomitant great reduction in population through therapeutic starvation and subsistence economy for those who remain but the elite who think they can remain elite in a world without other people.


15 posted on 09/10/2022 11:10:58 AM PDT by arthurus (covfefe )
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To: SaxxonWoods

And packaging


16 posted on 09/10/2022 11:12:27 AM PDT by arthurus (covfefe m)
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To: Lazamataz

The combination of Yellen, Granholm, & Newsom could spell doom for us before lack of earth’s natural resources ever does.


17 posted on 09/10/2022 11:12:37 AM PDT by oldtech
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To: rktman

Anything plastic.


18 posted on 09/10/2022 11:13:32 AM PDT by arthurus (covfefe n)
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To: John Semmens

If only we could generate fossil fuels from sunshine and wind.


19 posted on 09/10/2022 12:25:02 PM PDT by 353FMG
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To: Jim W N

Then go out and find some yourself.


20 posted on 09/10/2022 12:47:34 PM PDT by crusty old prospector
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