Posted on 07/14/2021 11:53:00 AM PDT by DFG
LOS ANGELES, CA—LAX air traffic controllers are scrambling to make room on the runway for an unexpected arrival: a charter plane full of Texas Democrats. According to sources, Governor Abbott bribed the charter plane pilot tasked with taking the Democrats back to Texas, and convinced the pilots to reroute to California, where they'll probably feel more at home.
Abbott's approval rating skyrocketed after employing the "4D chess" move, which got rid of Texas Democrats for good and allowed Republicans to continue running the state unimpeded in one fell swoop.
"Well, y'all, looks like we ain't in Texas anymore," said one representative as she stepped off the private jet and cracked open another Miller Lite. "Way fewer mosquitos, for one thing. And what's that smell?" The smell was, in fact, some feces she had stepped in, a welcome present from a homeless man living on the tarmac.
Governor Newsom welcomed them to the state, gave each of them a $600 welfare check, and asked them to "please not leave me like everyone else." He is reportedly hopeful that they will help campaign for his reelection during the recall coming up this fall.
At publishing time, the Democrat representatives were trying to rent a U-Haul to move back to Texas but they were all sold out.
Leave them all in DC.
Revoke their passports to reenter the Republic of Texas.
“what’s that smell?” The smell was, in fact, some feces she had stepped in, a welcome present from a homeless man living on the tarmac”
Hilarious
I would love to enjoy a bottle wine some evening with the Bee writers!
designate them as illegal aliens and put ‘em in cages
The “Harvard” grad metrosexual Dem Texas Lawmaker wimp that Pete Hegseth interviews last night at 7pm was hilarious. What a pajama boy, probably drunk after a sip of that Miller Lite Beer.
Make them quarantine 30 days at the state capitol. /s
Since they weren’t wearing their masks, force them to quarantine for 14 days before coming back to Texas.
That would raise the IQ in both states.
LOL I read the headline twice and was about to click on the link to read the “article” before I noticed it was from the Babylon Bee.
I had the hook in my mouth and was about to swallow it!
Take them to Cuba and let them see what the result of the logic is.
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