Posted on 06/17/2021 3:17:00 PM PDT by DFG
Reports from across the nation indicated that teenage boys are suddenly much less interested in sneaking to the mailbox and taking out the mailers and fliers from Victoria's Secret in the mail before their parents get to them.
The change seemed to have something to do with the lingerie and women's clothing company announcing the cancellation of its supermodels, the "Angels", who are being replaced with feminist icons such as Megan Rapinoe.
"Yeah, you know what? Mom can keep this one," said one disappointed boy, Oliver Hampton, putting the catalog back in the mailbox after seeing Rapinoe on the cover. He then went and did something more productive and less sinful with his time, pwning his friends in Fortnite.
Christians across the nation, though, are hailing the move as a big win for purity, since fewer men will be tempted to look at the scantily clad women. "Most men won't even have to avert their eyes when walking by the stores anymore," said one pastor. "Frankly, this is the biggest win for the abstinence movement since Star Wars came out."
At publishing time, Victoria's Secret had tried to win back its key teenage boy demographic by unveiling a new model: Amy Schumer.
Victoria’s Secret secret is spreading fast ,LOL
Now Hustler, that was for the really depraved among us!
Might as well go with old National Geographic now.
When I was about 8 years old, I’d settle for the SEARS catalog.
I used to like the cartoon in playboy with the two guys hanging in a dungeon.
I went National Geographic banana titties...
This is Kurt Schictler-worthy, and why the Bee deserves the Mark Twain award.
IMO, it's WAY TOO EASY to get to and that's plain sicko. Even a simple Google search can lead an underage kid to that stuff.
They can get all the porn they want free online.
“Nation’s Teenage Boys Suddenly Much Less Interested In Finding Victoria’s Secret Catalog In The Mail..”
One less left handed magazine!
What about pancake ones? Mom says it’s okay to look at if she has a plate in her bottom lip, ROFL!
I was just thinking of those.
Meh, they’re okay.
Pacific Islanders were the best of the NatGeo boob.
Don’t forget the Sears catalog...
My fave SI cover of all time when they didn't put fatties and trannies on the swimsuit issue.
Victoria’s Secret only comes in Big , Bigger and Massive now
Porn everywhere on line. Victoria S is old hat.
I always thought those Forum stories were fake, until one day when I was posting on Free Republic and got some Freepmail...
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