Posted on 06/12/2021 12:12:51 PM PDT by DFG
AUSTIN, TX—Texas Governor Greg Abbott signed an executive order today donating the city of Austin and all its citizens to California. A move long in the making, the order gives all million citizens back to California, since most of them came from there anyway.
"I hereby declare Austin and all the hippy yuppie Democrats in this God-forsaken town are now citizens of California," Abbott said at the signing to loud cheering and applause. "Good riddance, and may God have mercy on your souls. Texas don't want you, and I sure as heck don't want you."
"This is long overdue." Many onlookers shot pistols into the air and shotgunned cans of Shiner Bock at the announcement. They all then went to Whataburger to celebrate.
Abbott is moving the capital of Texas out of Austin as part of the executive action and is considering nearby towns like Flying Mosquito, Texas, and Sweltering Plains, Texas, as the new capital.
Governor Newsom of California happily accepted the gift, as he has been needing more people to make up for all those who fled during his short time in office.
New York Times needs to fact check this one.
Oh, I wish!
These deals don’t happen in a vacuum. What does Texas have to take in return, San Francisco?!!?
Rats, it’s only the Bee
3rd world Portland is a sister city to Austin. In fact that is where Portland got its motto, Keep Portland Crappy.
You don’t get this game! It’s Orange County.
Right? I have a liberal brother. He lived in Austin. Not liberal enough so he moved to Portland.
I’m sure the rural portions of Northern California would love to be part of Texas.
These deals don't happen in a vacuum. What does Texas have to take in return, San Francisco?!!?
Gilroy
“These deals don’t happen in a vacuum. What does Texas have to take in return, San Francisco?!!?”
Yosemite…surrounded by a wall to keep the libs away.
I was so excited until I learned the article was a Babylon Bee article and my excitement turned into heartbreak.
“We’ll take the n****rs and the Chinks, but we DON’T want the Californians”
Lol! Blazing Saddles.
LOL!
That’s freaking He Larry Us...
Hey, I live in Gilroy
Closest thing to being in America without moving to San Juan Bautista and not putting up with heat and humidity
This one was NOT the Bee
Even Thanksgiving is canceled!
New Jersey school district yanks ALL holiday names off the calendar to avoid ‘hurt feelings’ as students can now get ready to gather with the family to celebrate ... ‘Day Off’
Daily Mail ^ | 11 June 2021 | MATT MCNULTY
https://freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/3967095/posts
Gov. Abbott is said to have autographed some pillars of salt on their way out of town.
God bless Texas!
DANG!
>>There was no proof he had ever been there before or even knew it was a gay club.
I beg to differ. There were customers who had recognized him from previous visits.
And the killer’s wife knew about his plot. Why she wasn’t sent to life in prison for her role I will never know.
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