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SI Swimsuit Issue Features First-Ever Baptist Model In Floor-Length Denim Skirt [ed] [satire]
Babylon Bee ^ | April 30, 2019 | Staff

Posted on 04/30/2019 1:36:50 PM PDT by C19fan

In a controversial move, Sports Illustrated has unveiled photos of its first ever Baptist swimsuit model, pictured in a floor-length denim skirt, modest collared blouse, and no makeup or jewelry whatsoever, other than her purity ring.

The "hot" photoshoot includes pictures of the woman lying on the beach, rolling around in the water, and reading Passion and Purity on the beach in sexy poses, all while completely covered up.

Christians quickly praised the decision.

"We are glad SI finally sees the value of modesty," one leading evangelical said. "A woman mostly covered from head to toe is a great precedent to set, and we hope more models going forward will be dressed this modestly."

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; islam; satire
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1 posted on 04/30/2019 1:36:50 PM PDT by C19fan
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To: C19fan

haha, perfect retort.


2 posted on 04/30/2019 1:37:58 PM PDT by bboop (does not suffer fools gladly)
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To: C19fan

Yeah, man. Smokin’


3 posted on 04/30/2019 1:39:12 PM PDT by Zuben Elgenubi (NOPe to GOPe)
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To: C19fan

They couldn’t do any better than a overweight Hipster?


4 posted on 04/30/2019 1:40:33 PM PDT by Zathras
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To: C19fan

She’s got that head bun like many of the young men around here


5 posted on 04/30/2019 1:40:41 PM PDT by Vaquero (Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.)
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To: C19fan

More Pentacostal than Baptist IMO


6 posted on 04/30/2019 1:40:58 PM PDT by Sybeck1 (Trump 2020)
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To: C19fan

7 posted on 04/30/2019 1:41:01 PM PDT by Yo-Yo ( is the /sarc tag really necessary?)
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To: C19fan

Don’t tell me SI put some stupid @#$$ing pictures of a covered muzzie in one of their magazines.


8 posted on 04/30/2019 1:41:02 PM PDT by dp0622 (The Left should know if.. Trump is kicked out of office, it is WAR)
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To: C19fan

Is she in a church basement with a pot luck? SCHWING!


9 posted on 04/30/2019 1:41:09 PM PDT by BBQToadRibs
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To: Yo-Yo

Not guilty!!!


10 posted on 04/30/2019 1:42:24 PM PDT by DannyTN
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To: C19fan

Isn’t that more of a classic Pentecostal female dress code? Hilarious regardless.


11 posted on 04/30/2019 1:42:29 PM PDT by Carpe Cerevisi
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To: dp0622

You did not hear SI has a Muslim Somalian “swimsuit model” in a burkini.


12 posted on 04/30/2019 1:42:43 PM PDT by C19fan
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To: dp0622

You missed that? They had a model in a burka-kini


13 posted on 04/30/2019 1:43:05 PM PDT by TheDandyMan
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To: Sybeck1

“More Pentacostal than Baptist”

Yep. Pentecostal. We Baptists do have some lookers.

Actually this girl is quite cute. She’s like you’d see in Scene One of a Hallmark movie. Then she lets her hair down, takes off her glasses, puts on some lipstick and becomes a knockout.


14 posted on 04/30/2019 1:44:52 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam
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To: C19fan

I just looked at images.

This country is in trouble.


15 posted on 04/30/2019 1:45:19 PM PDT by dp0622 (The Left should know if.. Trump is kicked out of office, it is WAR)
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To: dp0622

Only a matter of time until they features some tranny, with or without landing gear removed.


16 posted on 04/30/2019 1:46:33 PM PDT by doorgunner69
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To: C19fan

Perfect!


17 posted on 04/30/2019 1:48:36 PM PDT by Oldeconomybuyer (The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other people's money.)
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To: dp0622
Don’t tell me SI put some stupid @#$$ing pictures of a covered muzzie in one of their magazines.

Ok, I won't tell you.

18 posted on 04/30/2019 1:48:40 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: C19fan

19 posted on 04/30/2019 1:49:41 PM PDT by Oldeconomybuyer (The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other people's money.)
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To: dp0622
Don’t tell me SI put some stupid @#$$ing pictures of a covered muzzie in one of their magazines.

It was posted here on FR several times:

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/search?m=all;o=time;q=quick;s=burkini


20 posted on 04/30/2019 1:50:13 PM PDT by Yo-Yo ( is the /sarc tag really necessary?)
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