Uncle Obama's Health-O-Rama!

The People's Cube ^ | 10-30-2013 | Ivan Betinov

[servo1969]

YEEEEEEEE-HAWWWWWW!

PEEPUL, PEEPUL, PEEPUL!

I'm Crazy Ivan Betinov from THE STALIN STOREHOUSE, and I'm back with another deal

JUST FOR YOU!

That's right, friends and neighbors, THE STALIN STOREHOUSE, the same good folks that brought you GENUINE OBAMA BRAND SNAKE OIL back in 2009 at the low, low cost of only $787,000,000,000, are back with the next NEW DEAL to make it all better!

At THE STALIN STOREHOUSE we are keeping an eye out for YOU!
(With a little help from the boys at the NSA)

We've all heard rumors that everything might not be up to snuff in the online exchanges. While we at THE STALIN STOREHOUSE are as sure as Jay Carney that these rumors are only rumors, and Republican Rumors at that, we still want to do our part to usher in the finest Soviet Health Care available. That why we are proud to announce the Grand Opening of...

Uncle Obama's Health-O-Rama

Your one-stop shop for all your healthcare needs!

Now, we all know that our beloved President, fine man that he is, promised repeatedly "If you like your current health insurance, you can keep it. Period." And THAT IS ABSOLUTELY TRUE, FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS! Do not believe those dirty, dirty, liars at the Congressional Budget Office! Why, some members of Congress are REPUBLICANS, so you obviously can't trust the CBO!

So we know that if you do like your current health insurance, you can keep it. Period. But we here at THE STALIN STOREHOUSE ask

Why in the wide, wide world of sports would you want to?

Take a look at that old clunker of a policy you've been saddled with. Sure, it's CHEAP. But that's the problem! It ain't got no Bells! It ain't got no Whistles! Sure, you are a 26-year-old non-smoking vegan male who doesn't use drugs...

BUT WHAT IF YOU GET PREGNANT?

WHAT IF YOU TURN INTO A DRUG ADDICT?

WHAT IF YOU GO CRAZY AND START SUPPORTING TED Cruz ?

Where will you be then, friend? Well, that's where

Uncle Obama's Health-O-Rama

Can help

Come on down to

Uncle Obama's Health-O-Rama

at your local STALIN STOREHOUSE and check out these DEALS!

Tired of all the cool kids making fun of your wimpy $20 co-pay? Well, WE GOT POLICIES WITH $50 CO-PAYS! HECK, WE EVEN GOT SOME WITH $100 CO-PAYS! You'll be the envy of the collective with this cool new plan!

Feel like you AIN'T paying your fair share with a $1,000 deductible? OUR DEDUCTIBLES START AT $10,000! THAT'S RIGHT FRIENDS, A FULL $10,000 DEDUCTIBLE!

If you REALLY want to make Uncle Obama smile, ask about our "Stakhanovite Special":

+Full Dental Coverage

+Full Mental Coverage

+Full Drug Rehab Coverage

+Full Preganancy and Childbirth Coverage

+Full Prostate Coverage

+Full Ovarian Cancer Coverage

+Full Testicular Cancer Coverage

+Full Getting Trampled By a Wildebeest Coverage

+Full Meteor Strike Coverage

+Full Childcare Coverage

+Full Collision Coverage

PLUS FREE UNDERCOATING!

That's right Friends, it's one M--------- of a health plan!

Now some may say it's too expensive.

But I ask you friends, CAN YOU PUT A PRICE ON GOOD, QUALITY HEALTHCARE?

Neither can we, but we're pretty sure it's going to top a couple of trillion bucks.

Some misguided folks may even say they can't afford to buy it.

But I ask you friends, CAN YOU AFFORD NOT TO BUY IT?

So Come on Down and See Us at

Uncle Obama's Health-O-Rama

At your local STALIN STOREHOUSE

And Remember: Uncle Obama Says:

I Want YOU to Be a Government Dependent!

[servo1969]

Located directly across from JD's 24 hr. Drive-thru Pawn & Gun Auto Parts Pharmaceutical Adult Gift Bait and Tackle Discount Cigarette Outlet!

[TigersEye]

Do you have hot wings? I don’t see hot wings on the menu.

[A CA Guy]

I’m more sick about this than seeing the joke of it.

To me this is a major step toward the death of America as it was founded and meant to be.

[BobP]

RIP American Healthcare system.

They should have tried an free market attempt and kept government mostly on the sidelines.

No more Certificates of Need (CON) to compete in the marketplace. Total competition on every procedure and diagnostic test performed. End the excessive reimbursement rates that pad most bills submitted to patients' insurance companies.

No more $30,000 a week bills for a hospital room with equipment that's already bought and paid for and no $20 aspirins!

Politicians are creaming off the top - 30% typically on billings being paid to diagnostic centers, and that's only the tip of the iceberg.

For those lucky enough to have politically protected Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) centers, Computed Tomography (CT) Scanning centers, Dual-Energy X-Ray Absorptiometry (DEXA) centers, alcohol/drug addiction treatment centers, clinical blood testing centers and medical laboratory testing companies, everyday is Christmas.

Try to research this scam called a "State required Certificate of Need (CON)".

So politicians will never reform healthcare. There's to much profit in it the way it's run without free-market competition.

[Son House]

Vulnerability to confidence tricks
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confidence_trick

Confidence tricks exploit typical human characteristics such as greed, dishonesty, vanity, opportunism, lust, compassion, credulity, irresponsibility, desperation, and naïvety. As such, there is no consistent profile of a confidence trick victim;

the common factor is simply that the victim relies on the good faith of the con artist.

Victims of investment scams tend to show an incautious level of greed and gullibility, and many con artists target the elderly, but even alert and educated people may be taken in by other forms of confidence trick.

Accomplices, also known as shills, help manipulate the mark into accepting the perpetrator’s plan. In a traditional confidence trick, the mark is led to believe that he will be able to win money or some other prize by doing some task.

[lesliecortner]

I adore the People’s Cube~ thanks for posting!

[TigersEye]

Try to research this scam called a "State required Certificate of Need (CON)".

Thanks, I will. I had never heard of that. I hate insurance companies, especially for health insurance policies. I bought my own in the '80s and after the 2nd company did the same as the first (doubled my premiums after a couple of small claims) I dropped them and haven't had any insurance since. I blamed the gov then for protecting them.

The real problem all along was gov meddling. All companies should be allowed to compete in all states. A state gov problem not Fed but there it is. Tort reform is also needed.

But you are right, our health care system is about to die and so is our economy and that is going to be a direct result of 0bamaCare. I'm not sure it could recover even if it were all repealed today. Which isn't going to happen but that is the only rational thing to do.