Administration Shrugs Off Negative Jobs Report

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 6 July 2012 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

The Bureau of Labor Statistics reported that the official unemployment rate remained above 8% for the 41st straight month. The picture for Black unemployment was even more discouraging bumping up in June to over 14% for all ages and to over 39% for those aged 16-19.

The White House cautioned that voters should not place too much reliance on any one monthly report, but should look at the longer term trend. “A narrow focus on jobs misses the bigger picture,” Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers Alan Krueger said in a written statement. “Over the last three years more than 3 million workers have escaped the drudgery of wage slavery by joining the ranks of the compensated disabled. On top of this, another 4 million have simply dropped out of the workforce. These tremendous gains in the opportunity to enjoy more leisure time are not adequately accounted for in the official unemployment numbers.”

“Let's not lose sight of the fact that work is a disutility,” Krueger wrote. “People only do it because they feel they have to. I think we need to give the President some credit for helping a growing number of Americans to overcome this feeling. He's reduced some of the economic pressure by putting more people on food stamps than any other president. And his robust display of enjoyment of leisure activities like golf—where he has played more rounds than his four predecessors combined—has helped lower the social stigma of taking it easy.”

“The fact is, if the seven million who have left the workforce over the last three years were still under the delusion that they had to get jobs, the official unemployment rate would be over 11%,” Krueger observed. “So, by promoting leisure the President has actually lowered the official unemployment rate by 3% since 2009.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news posts you can find them at...

http://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/114542-2012-07-06-semi-news-a-satire-of-recent-news-july-8-2012.htm

[skinkinthegrass]

LOL.. great stuff. :-D

[skinkinthegrass]

"@ what point?"or for that matter; O'Bozo DeathCARE bill (Liberals owns it).. thxs, for the post.

[rockinqsranch]

ROFLMBO John. THAT’s right on the target of the Lib mindset. The creative dialogue....right on the mark. Good one. Mrs. RQSR, and myself laughing hard.

Thanks for the ping.

[rockinqsranch]

ROFLMBO John. THAT’s right on the target of the Lib mindset. The creative dialogue....right on the mark. Good one. Mrs. RQSR, and myself laughing hard.

Thanks for the ping.

[fatnotlazy]

John, this is awesome. Might be satire but these incompetents in Washington actually believe this.

Thanks yet again for the ping.

[markman46]

LOL another good one John

[doorgunner69]

You can almost imagine the “Carny” or other minion actually trying this one out on the stupid rubes to see if it works............

[GOPJ]

The suck-up press was shrugging off the report even as it was being released. I suspect they won’t do that when a Republican’s President.

[Seaplaner]

“The fact is, if the seven million who have left the workforce over the last three years were still under the delusion that they had to get jobs, the official unemployment rate would be over 11%,” Krueger observed. “So, by promoting leisure the President has actually lowered the official unemployment rate by 3% since 2009.”

After reading John's "semi" (cough, cough) satire, one suspects that the WH might ask Mister Krueger to go ahead and use the Semmens algorithm.

.

[gonzo]

"...“Let's not lose sight of the fact that work is a disutility..."

shit! Damn near got me, John ......................................... FRegards