Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

City Shuts Down Ill Woman’s Yard Sale [SATIRE]
A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^ | 20 August 2011 | John Semmens

Posted on 08/20/2011 8:09:35 PM PDT by John Semmens

A Salem, Oregon woman’s desperate efforts to raise funds to treat her bone cancer were stifled by City officials. Jan Cline had been holding weekly yard sales trading her possessions for the cash she needs to pay medical bills. City rules limit the number of yard sales per address to three per year.

Harden Callas, spokesman for the City’s Community Development Department urged people “to not lose sight of the bigger picture here. We know a lot of people are going to feel sympathetic toward Ms. Cline. But we can’t let her or anyone else put their own personal needs ahead of the community’s needs.”

“It’s a residential neighborhood,” Callas went on. “Allowing three yard sales a year is more than a generous concession to individual rights, if you ask me. It’s unfortunate that she sick, but if we bend the rules for her others will want exceptions too.”

Callas suggested that Cline “go on Medicaid. That way, she can keep all her stuff and let the government pay her medical bills.”

read more...

http://azconserv1.wordpress.com/2011/08/20/obama-compares-self-to-lincoln/


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Health/Medicine; Humor
KEYWORDS: bureaucracy; medicaid; regulations; satire
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-34 next last

1 posted on 08/20/2011 8:09:42 PM PDT by John Semmens
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
“Allowing three yard sales a year is more than a generous concession to individual rights, if you ask me.

Really? This is what individual rights have come to. Government "allowing" something is a "generous concession to individual rights."

2 posted on 08/20/2011 8:16:51 PM PDT by JimWayne
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Aw, she’s old and her best days are behind her. Cut her off and spend the money on someone whose life is worth living.


3 posted on 08/20/2011 8:18:31 PM PDT by ViLaLuz (2 Chronicles 7:14)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: ViLaLuz

Like a young illegal alien.


4 posted on 08/20/2011 8:19:12 PM PDT by ViLaLuz (2 Chronicles 7:14)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

I thought one couldn’t own anything like a home or vehicle in order to qualify for Medicaid.


5 posted on 08/20/2011 8:19:50 PM PDT by skr (May God confound the enemy)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Really hate when I forget to read the keywords.


6 posted on 08/20/2011 8:27:24 PM PDT by skr (May God confound the enemy)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

“Harden Callas, spokesman for the City’s Community Development Department urged people ‘to not lose sight of the bigger picture here. We know a lot of people are going to feel sympathetic toward Ms. Cline. But we can’t let her or anyone else put their own personal needs ahead of the community’s needs.’”

The “community” are the neighbors surrounding her, and have they decided she should not have more than three garage sales per year? Callas suggests Medicaid when in fact the program has a rather severe means test and would probably require her to use up a significant part of her resources before she qualified. Isn’t it just like a bureaucrat to suggest a government program when the best solution would be for the neighbors and the churches they attend to cooperate to help her.


7 posted on 08/20/2011 8:36:34 PM PDT by Retain Mike
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
Harden Callas, spokesman for the City’s Community Development Department urged people “to not lose sight of the bigger picture here. We know a lot of people are going to feel sympathetic toward Ms. Cline. But we can’t let her or anyone else put their own personal needs ahead of the community’s needs. It’s a residential neighborhood,” Callas went on. “Allowing three yard sales a year is more than a generous concession to individual rights, if you ask me."

Just think, the sum total of this woman's life is up to this immoral bureacratic monster who's greatest achievement was getting his driver's license, and who references such murderous power with the contemptuously insulting and dismissive sneer "if you ask me."

The "bigger picture," you bastard from hell, is the concept that the community exists to help individuals - not sacrifice them on the altar of collectivist obedience.

This creature is the nadir of human life. He is the end of human civilization - he is the depravity that, if it succeeds, will someday leave this earth a wasted ball of death. He is the horror of creation, the disgust of God, a traitor to all the freedoms ever held by humanity, and the absolute rape of every noble thing human beings have ever aspired to. His SOUL is sh!t.

8 posted on 08/20/2011 8:37:19 PM PDT by Talisker (History will show the Illuminati won the ultimate Darwin Award.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

John, the way things are going your satires read more like true stories every week.


9 posted on 08/20/2011 8:38:08 PM PDT by 43north (BHO: 50% black, 50% white, 100% RED)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: skr

Just wait a few years. Then this will read like a documentary of a recent incident. Several recent, local incidents, in fact.

The reason satire works is precisely because of its plausibility.


10 posted on 08/20/2011 8:38:34 PM PDT by coloradan (The US has become a banana republic, except without the bananas - or the republic.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: Talisker

satire....


11 posted on 08/20/2011 8:39:09 PM PDT by prov1813man (While the one you despise and ridicule works to protect you, those you embrace work to destroy you)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
Ahhhhhhhhh... you got me, John. You got me good.

And yet... what I wrote so closely matches the reality of the situation... I'm letting it stand - no retractions.

But just damn, you really got me.

12 posted on 08/20/2011 8:39:16 PM PDT by Talisker (History will show the Illuminati won the ultimate Darwin Award.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Good one again John. Right on the mark with the dialogue.


13 posted on 08/20/2011 8:39:59 PM PDT by rockinqsranch (Dems, Libs, Socialists, call 'em what you will, they ALL have fairies livin' in their trees.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
I hate these posts like yours that are semi true - semi made up BS just to pull viewers in on FR.

Go away.

14 posted on 08/20/2011 8:42:22 PM PDT by Last Dakotan
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
But we can’t let her or anyone else put their own personal needs ahead of the community’s needs.”

The needs of the collective outweight the rights of the individualin this case according to this bloviating jackass. What a good Marxist. What is the community/collective if it isn't made up of individuals? When government apparatchicks start talking about the "communitie's needs" I see a petty tyrant who doesn't have a clue as to what this country was founded for.

15 posted on 08/20/2011 8:45:24 PM PDT by from occupied ga (your own government is your most dangerous enemy)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

I live in salem,and the story is mostly true.the satire part is all the talk about medicaid.there really is a woman with cancer who is being told she cant have any more garage sales.But they are working on an exception, just for her.


16 posted on 08/20/2011 8:47:19 PM PDT by Nooseman (mutt)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
Only three yard sales per year?!

The lady should register one yard sale from January to April, one from May to August and the third one from September to December.

17 posted on 08/20/2011 8:54:32 PM PDT by mlocher (Is it time to cash in before I am taxed out?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
Harden Callas, spokesman for the City’s Community Development Department urged people “to not lose sight of the bigger picture here.

Does this idiot REALLY think the "bigger picture" in this case is making sure that people don't break this stupid ordinance? I do my best to see that this idiot is fired from his position because he is too stupid to do the job he was given.

18 posted on 08/20/2011 8:59:29 PM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (Islam is the religion of Satan and Mohammed was his minion.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: JimWayne

More than three yard sales a year and you are not having a yard sale, you are running a business from your home.

A yard sale is to clear out stuff and get cash, not take in new inventory each week to keep the sale going each week.


19 posted on 08/20/2011 9:01:09 PM PDT by gunsequalfreedom (Conservative is not a label of convenience. It is a guide to your actions.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: 43north; coloradan
43north:
"John, the way things are going your satires read more like true stories every week."

coloradan:
"Just wait a few years. Then this will read like a documentary of a recent incident."

The poster knows that the stories are true.

City shuts down yard sale for cancer victim
dailymail.co.uk ^ | 18th August 2011
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2765748/posts


20 posted on 08/20/2011 9:01:49 PM PDT by familyop (Behold the genius in contemporary political speech.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-34 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson