Al Gore poetry prize: the winner

Telegraph Blogs (U.K.) ^ | January 10, 2010 | James Delingpole

[Schnucki]

Today, finally, belatedly, I am proud to announce the winner of the Inaugural Al Gore Poetry Prize. It will probably be the first and last, because it was such a total bugger collating all the entries using the Wordpress software. Still, no reflection on your entries. You rose to the occasion magnificently.

There were so many fine entries I don’t know where to begin. But here are a few of my favourites:

Rastech’s nursery rhyme

Baa Baa climate science,
Have you any wood?
Yes sir, yes sir,
Tree rings good,
Data for the master, whose models are insane,
and lots of lovely money for the crooks down the lane.

Sebber’s Haiku

Fox’s Glacier Mints
Don’t contain real glaciers
Tossers

Another haiku from Mark Adams

Fake data buries
Science settled like the snow
Outside my window

Quite a few tributes to Al Gore, including this one from Mark E

The earth’s core’s degrees are in millions
The emails all ten years old
My fortune is counted in billions
And it’s your short and curlies I hold

and this very dark one from Legion

In His Mansion he sits
with the Building full lit
and lights cut the Dark of the Grounds
not a care in His head
for the People He’s Bled
for the Screams of the Dead make no sound.

Sheumais’s stirring battle hymn, especially…

Will truth win, well time will show,
but Delingpole’s army will take the blows
and fight until we can fight no more
the evil empire of Al Gore.

Sheumais appears to have had a Condor moment with this offering and forgotten to write the final

[RightOnline]

Hilarious. I love it. Seeing Gore’s ox being gored; such a joy.

[steelyourfaith]

 

Beam me to Planet Gore !

[libertarian27]

Those are Great!

[poetknowit]

To think
this nit-wit
was once one
heart-beat away
or, twenty
hanging chads
removed from
RULER OF THE
INDUSTRIAL WORLD
is more than
frightening -

[BruCru]

ping

[The Comedian]

There was an elite dunce from Tennessee

Who cashed in 'til leaks set fake data free

He made up a threat

"Men make Earth sweat"

So said he who sits down to Vee pee

Frowning takes 68 muscles.
Smiling takes 6.
Pulling this trigger takes 2.
I'm lazy.