Obama came through on his campaign theme of 'equality' Monday by proclaiming June as "Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month". Obama lauded what he calls "the determination and dedication" of the LGBT movement. Posted on 06/05/2009 5:37:40 PM PDT by Starman417
Obama came through on his campaign theme of 'equality' Monday by proclaiming June as "Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month". Obama lauded what he calls "the determination and dedication" of the LGBT movement.
In the same spirit of equality, I'd like to propose July to be designated as Heterosexual Pride Month in hopes of drawing attention to and appreciation for traditional moral values and marriage as practiced by heterosexuals. Heterosexual Pride Month could be an occasion to focus on the joys of being heterosexual and monogamous. And the determined and dedicated Americans who are both.
Heterosexuals, whom I'll call 'happies', seldom have their voices heard or their sexual practices mentioned. Although a majority of Americans are happies, they are loath to flaunt their bedroom habits in public. Blame an ingrained sense of outdated modesty.
Most happies are advocates of traditional marriage and cling to the notion that sex should be a private affair. Some even believe that sex is a matter between a man and his wife and believe the government has no right to dictate or influence what they do in the privacy of their own bedrooms.
Some happies go even further and believe that God made Adam and Eve (not Adam and Steve) for a darn good reason. Most happies also believe that their sexual habits should not be thrust into the faces of those who feel differently. They call it, well, just good manners. Both of these views would be excellent topics for discussion during Heterosexual Pride Month.
Since the traditional family has long been considered a vital component of civil society, we could also use Heterosexual Pride Month to emphasize and explore the social compact that traditional marriage used to signify.
Now that Obama has brought tolerance back into vogue, I recommend using Heterosexual Pride Month as an occasion to voice the legitimate moral objections many Americans (57%) have to gay marriage and the plethora of sexual practices that Obama, in the name of equality, is demanding all Americans not only accept, but endorse.
(Excerpt) Read more at floppingaces.net ...
Cool, we could could have a Hetero Parade, of course, because it is necessary to have a parade dedicated to our sexual orientation. We could have hetero fashion, because our clothing should be dictated by our heterosexuality. Perhaps a special hanky for a front pocket, or a special piercing in a unique place to identify us solely by our sexual attraction.
What else? Hetero ghettos. Hetero businesses. And a hetero flag! To fly about city hall. We could have a day when children all over the nation are lectured (in great detail) about the joys and significance of hetero sexual practices.
We could have a hetero cultural center, because heaven knows that we fit into no other culture, only our sexual one. It could be covered with hetero art, and we could stack the shelves with hetero lit.
I would also like to propose we fund a chair for Heterosexual Studies at Harvard.
I think at least 98-99% of the year should be “Heterosexual Pride” time since we are 98-99% of the population. Perhaps even celebrate “Traditional Nuclear Family” and “Married Couples” and “Expectant Parents” periods within the 51 weeks that would be OUR time.
How about a “We don’t sleep with 100s of strangers we’ll never meet” week. And perhaps a “Thank God I know where my equipment was designed to go” month. Maybe even a “Grateful my Anus will never collapse or leak” week.
Oh man, would that screw them up. The Boston Globe editorial page (also known as 'the front page') would absolutely explode.
What the hell is gay pride? I don’t understand the concept of being proud of a sexual preference. Does Barney Frank feel pride the moment he gets down on all fours? Wow, that’s scary.
I think Barney certainly feels something when he’s down on all fours. Don’t know if I’d label it ‘pride’.
The only thing gays are proud of is their dicks.
It's in the demographics:
Of course, some of those views may be simply age-related rather than generational. But some of it, at least, is generational.
Got ya’ beat; I’m a lesbian trapped in a man’s body. ;_)
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