Cool, we could could have a Hetero Parade, of course, because it is necessary to have a parade dedicated to our sexual orientation. We could have hetero fashion, because our clothing should be dictated by our heterosexuality. Perhaps a special hanky for a front pocket, or a special piercing in a unique place to identify us solely by our sexual attraction.
What else? Hetero ghettos. Hetero businesses. And a hetero flag! To fly about city hall. We could have a day when children all over the nation are lectured (in great detail) about the joys and significance of hetero sexual practices.
We could have a hetero cultural center, because heaven knows that we fit into no other culture, only our sexual one. It could be covered with hetero art, and we could stack the shelves with hetero lit.
I would also like to propose we fund a chair for Heterosexual Studies at Harvard.
Oh man, would that screw them up. The Boston Globe editorial page (also known as 'the front page') would absolutely explode.