Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Bill Authorizing Federal Concentration Camps Introduced
A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^ | 30 Jan 2009 | John Semmens

Posted on 02/01/2009 7:34:11 PM PST by John Semmens

Representative Alcee Hastings (D-Fla) has introduced legislation (H. R. 645) authorizing the establishment of “national emergency centers” on military installations throughout the nation. The facilities would be intended to “house individuals and families when the president declares it a matter of national security requiring it.”

Hastings dismissed fears that these centers would be abused to stifle opposition to the government. “The decision on when or who will be housed in these facilities will not be made by a miscreant president like Bush or Nixon,” Hastings reassured his critics. “I have the utmost confidence in President Obama’s humanitarian instincts. If someone like Rush Limbaugh ends up in one of the centers, it will only be because the well-being of the country requires it.”

The congressman stressed that the “centers” would be nothing like those run by Hitler or Stalin. “Inhabitants won’t be shot, gassed, or starved,” Hastings promised. “The crematoriums will only be used for those dying from natural causes or accidental deaths. A better model would be the camps used to intern Japanese-Americans during World War II.”

The bill includes funding of only $180 million per year. “It’s not like we have to accommodate millions, at least I hope we don’t,” Hastings said. “Timely and targeted use may stem the need for expansive accommodations.”

In related news, the Clark County School District of Las Vegas has modified the pledge of allegiance recited by its school children. Instead of the flag, the president is the new focus of the oath. “Pledging to a flag doesn’t make any sense,” according to Superintendent Julius Schreck. “The flag is an inanimate object. The president is the animate, active representation of the nation’s will. If we teach our children and, indeed, their parents, as well, to get behind him there is no limit to what we can accomplish.”

read more...

http://www.azconservative.org/Semmens1.htm


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: democrats; hr645; internment; obama; satire
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-45 next last

1 posted on 02/01/2009 7:34:12 PM PST by John Semmens
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
> If someone like Rush Limbaugh ends up in one of the centers, it will only be because the well-being of the country requires it.

Did he really say that???? If he did, I guarantee it will be the most regrettable statement of what's left of his political career.

2 posted on 02/01/2009 7:35:59 PM PST by NewJerseyJoe (Rat mantra: "Facts are meaningless! You can use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: NewJerseyJoe

satire


3 posted on 02/01/2009 7:39:28 PM PST by i_dont_chat (Our black President is quite blackmailable.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: NewJerseyJoe

Not unexpected from a criminal.


4 posted on 02/01/2009 7:40:01 PM PST by golfisnr1 (Democrats are like roaches - hard to get rid of.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: NewJerseyJoe

keyword

satire


5 posted on 02/01/2009 7:40:02 PM PST by porter_knorr
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Another good one John.


6 posted on 02/01/2009 7:40:30 PM PST by rockinqsranch (Dems, Libs, Socialists, Call 'em what you will, they ALL have Fairies livin' in their Trees.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: golfisnr1

Ooops.


7 posted on 02/01/2009 7:40:33 PM PST by golfisnr1 (Democrats are like roaches - hard to get rid of.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

I always need to remember to check the source out. Sometimes the articles posted just make me worry more till I start reading down and find out it’s satire.


8 posted on 02/01/2009 7:41:24 PM PST by Toki ("Palin Pingers" Freepmail Liberity Rocks or me to get on the list today!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: i_dont_chat

satire

so far.


9 posted on 02/01/2009 7:43:06 PM PST by Da Coyote
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Satire? Or prophecy?


10 posted on 02/01/2009 7:44:55 PM PST by MichiganConservative (You are a slave. The government is your owner and master. For many slaves, it is also their god.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: NewJerseyJoe
Did he really say that???? If he did, I guarantee it will be the most regrettable statement of what's left of his political career.

While these camps are apparently real, or will be soon enough if Hastings has his way, this particular article is satire.

11 posted on 02/01/2009 7:45:56 PM PST by Titus Quinctius Cincinnatus (Nihil utile nisi quod honestum - Marcus Tullius Cicero)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Another good one.


12 posted on 02/01/2009 7:47:19 PM PST by HollyB
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Are you so sure that’s satire?


13 posted on 02/01/2009 7:47:31 PM PST by wastedyears (April 21st, 2009 - International Iron Maiden Day)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: golfisnr1

Don’t worry, these articles got me a couple of times too.


14 posted on 02/01/2009 7:50:39 PM PST by HollyB
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]

To: NewJerseyJoe

“...most regrettable statement of what’s left of his political career.”

All the idiots who voted for him are probably in agreement with the building of detention camps. Now the question is if the inmates will have to do forced labor and if there will be gas chambers. Isn’t it change what these idiots voted for?


15 posted on 02/01/2009 7:50:42 PM PST by 353FMG (The name is Beam, James Beam.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: i_dont_chat
Not so fast...there is no satire here.

http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h111-645

16 posted on 02/01/2009 7:51:29 PM PST by JrsyJack (Oh dem golden slippers!!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
1st Session

H. R. 645

To direct the Secretary of Homeland Security to establish national emergency centers on military installations.

IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES

January 22, 2009

Mr. HASTINGS of Florida introduced the following bill; which was referred to the Committee on Transportation and Infrastructure, and in addition to the Committee on Armed Services, for a period to be subsequently determined by the Speaker, in each case for consideration of such provisions as fall within the jurisdiction of the committee concerned

A BILL

To direct the Secretary of Homeland Security to establish national emergency centers on military installations.

Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America in Congress assembled,

SECTION 1. SHORT TITLE.

This Act may be cited as the ‘National Emergency Centers Establishment Act’.

SEC. 2. ESTABLISHMENT OF NATIONAL EMERGENCY CENTERS.

(a) In General- In accordance with the requirements of this Act, the Secretary of Homeland Security shall establish not fewer than 6 national emergency centers on military installations.

(b) Purpose of National Emergency Centers- The purpose of a national emergency center shall be to use existing infrastructure--

(1) to provide temporary housing, medical, and humanitarian assistance to individuals and families dislocated due to an emergency or major disaster;

(2) to provide centralized locations for the purposes of training and ensuring the coordination of Federal, State, and local first responders;

(3) to provide centralized locations to improve the coordination of preparedness, response, and recovery efforts of government, private, and not-for-profit entities and faith-based organizations; and

(4) to meet other appropriate needs, as determined by the Secretary of Homeland Security.

...


17 posted on 02/01/2009 7:54:09 PM PST by dayglored (Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: JrsyJack

Achtung! Alle Juden!.....


18 posted on 02/01/2009 7:54:34 PM PST by stboz
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
Isn't this what the moonbats feared Bush would do? How are they going to take this? Will they even notice?
19 posted on 02/01/2009 7:55:28 PM PST by Ditter
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: JrsyJack; i_dont_chat
> Not so fast...there is no satire here. http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h111-645

The bill by that name/number is real, but the satire is the twist...

20 posted on 02/01/2009 7:55:40 PM PST by dayglored (Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-45 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson