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Porn Industry to Seek Bailout Money
A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^
| 10 Jan 2009
| John Semmens
Posted on 01/10/2009 5:11:58 PM PST by John Semmens
Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis and Hustler magazine publisher Larry Flynt say they have sent letters to Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and Representative Henry Waxman (D-Calif.) asking for $5 billion.
“People don’t understand the importance of our industry in these hard economic times,” Francis said. “Men who’ve lost their jobs will have time on their hands. We can help occupy that time. Instead of roaming the streets looking for trouble, they can be safely diverted. Besides, Larry has some confidential information that many in Congress might find especially persuasive.”
(Excerpt) Read more at azconservative.org ...
TOPICS: Business/Economy; Humor; Society; TV/Movies
KEYWORDS: boobs; nudity; satire; sex
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To: 14erClimb; #1CTYankee; 2ndDivisionVet; 3D-JOY; A message; abigailsmybaby; acapesket; afnamvet; ...
To: John Semmens
3
posted on
01/10/2009 5:13:00 PM PST
by
i_dont_chat
(Our black President is quite blackmailable.)
To: John Semmens; NeoCaveman; SoothingDave; CholeraJoe; xsmommy
4
posted on
01/10/2009 5:15:16 PM PST
by
tioga
(Let us unite in prayer for our country.)
To: John Semmens
Too bad this one isn’t satire...
5
posted on
01/10/2009 5:18:03 PM PST
by
xcamel
(The urge to save humanity is always a false front for the urge to rule it. - H. L. Mencken)
To: John Semmens
The relief package is going to be delivered in a plain brown wrapper!
6
posted on
01/10/2009 5:22:42 PM PST
by
LottieDah
(If only those who speak so eloquently on the rights of animals would do so on behalf of the unborn.)
To: John Semmens
How do you say stimulate the economy?
Very good John.
.....Bob
7
posted on
01/10/2009 5:28:54 PM PST
by
Lokibob
(When handed lemons...Refuse to sign for them. Life's lemons can't be delivered without a signature.)
To: John Semmens
Well, if it was ‘Boys Gone Wild’, Barney Frank would be all over it.
8
posted on
01/10/2009 5:29:20 PM PST
by
tbpiper
(Al Gore is to Global Warming what Berney Madoff is to Finance .)
To: John Semmens
“...Larry has some confidential information that many in Congress might find especially persuasive.”
hehe. Truth there.
9
posted on
01/10/2009 5:30:14 PM PST
by
dynachrome
(Barack Hussein Obama yunikku khinaaziir)
To: John Semmens
Besides, Larry has some confidential information that many in Congress might find especially persuasive.” Guess we'll know who they are when they push for this bailout. LOL!
10
posted on
01/10/2009 6:17:56 PM PST
by
NRA2BFree
(We've got more snow since Albore invented global warming than we've had for the last two decades.)
To: John Semmens
11
posted on
01/10/2009 6:36:41 PM PST
by
melt
(Someday they'll wish their Jihad... Jihadn't.)
To: John Semmens
Thanks for the ping John. Read them all. Excellent satire as usual. We chuckled at the truths in them all.
12
posted on
01/10/2009 7:02:28 PM PST
by
rockinqsranch
(Dems, Libs, Socialists, Call 'em what you will, they ALL have Fairies livin' in their Trees.)
To: John Semmens
Satire for sure :-) -— The day the porn mob runs out of money, man will have been extinct for some time :-)
13
posted on
01/10/2009 7:36:30 PM PST
by
EagleUSA
To: John Semmens
Very good, John, thanks for the ping. :)
14
posted on
01/10/2009 8:06:58 PM PST
by
jazusamo
(But there really is no free lunch, except in the world of political rhetoric,.: Thomas Sowell)
To: John Semmens
John...you're killing me. 'CNN spokesperson, Bea Smurch...'
May I suggest her PMSNBC counterpart...Ima Browne-Nozar?
;) PaMom
15
posted on
01/10/2009 9:06:10 PM PST
by
PennsylvaniaMom
(PA is a banana republic without the great weather to actually grow bananas.)
To: John Semmens
John, must be getting tougher and tougher to do parody with real life as competition...
16
posted on
01/10/2009 9:43:00 PM PST
by
aquila48
To: John Semmens
In related news, it has been disclosed that Barack’s 71-year-old mother-in-law, Marian Robinson, will be residing with him and his family in the White House. “I’m going to keep an eye on him and try to make sure he doesn’t go smoking crack or hang out with hoodlums like he did in Chicago,” Robinson declared. “After all, he is president now and a lot more people will be out to make him look bad and bring him down.”Ohhh. That's gonna leave a mark. HeHe.
17
posted on
01/10/2009 9:55:13 PM PST
by
uptoolate
(Shhh. If you listen real hard, God is speaking to America.)
To: John Semmens
” hard economic times”
Or flaccid.
“Massa’s boast wasn’t true to the facts, though. The 282-mile distance between the congressman’s district and Washington exceeds the 200-mile range of the car and there are no refueling locations along the way. The trip was managed by abandoning the first car in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania and continuing in a second identical car. Both fuel-cell cars ultimately had to be towed back to their points of origin.”
:D
18
posted on
01/10/2009 11:16:56 PM PST
by
Impy
(RED=COMMUNIST, NOT REPUBLICAN)
To: fieldmarshaldj; AuH2ORepublican; Clintonfatigued
Don’t forgot this is truth mixed satire but it mentions goofball Eric Massa who needs to be a one-termer. I think the 29th held and was the only NYseat to support McStain despite Kuhl losing.
He really did take a fuel-cell prototype car to DC and needed to switch cars cause it couldn’t get all the way there. Obviously GM owns his ass.
19
posted on
01/10/2009 11:24:14 PM PST
by
Impy
(RED=COMMUNIST, NOT REPUBLICAN)
To: John Semmens
20
posted on
01/11/2009 5:33:37 AM PST
by
WayneS
(Respect the 2nd Amendment; Repeal the 16th)
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