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DUmmie FUnnies 09-15-06 ("Kerry: I'm prepared to kick Swift Boat's ass")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | September 15, 2006 | John Kerry, DUmmies, and PJ-Comix

Posted on 09/15/2006 5:54:30 PM PDT by PJ-Comix

When faced with the Swift Boat Vets commercials during his 2004 campaign, John Kerry basically assumed the fetal position and just hoped they would go away. Instead, that series of commercials turned out to be perhaps the most effective ads in political history. Kerry's strong lead early in August of that year quickly dissipated as a result of those commercials. However, Kerry how has had a change of heart. Now he is ANGRY and as indicated by this DUmmie THREAD, "Kerry: I'm prepared to kick Swift Boat's ass." Unfortunately for Kerry, even most of the DUmmies aren't buying into Kerry's false bravado. As even they have noticed, Kerry was MIA when it came to answering the Swift Boat Vets For Truth charges a couple of years ago. And now he wants a SECOND chance in which he promises to be aggressive? Sorry, Kerry. You had your chance and you blew it. However, it is amusing to watch both Kerry's and the DUmmie rage at the Swift Boat Vets in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, whose memory of those commercials has been seared, SEARED into his mind, is in the [brackets]:

Kerry: I'm prepared to kick Swift Boat's ass

[Kerry: I'm prepared to sign my Form 180...but not send it in.]

Sen. John Kerry (D-MA) doesn't believe that Hillary Clinton has the inside track on the 2008 Democratic presidential nomination and says he would vigorously defend himself against new attacks by the Swift Boat team, according to an interview with The Examiner.

[Hillary's nomination has already been arranged by Karl Rove, Kerry. Live with it.]

"I’m prepared to kick their ass from one end of America to the other," said Kerry, in a strong hint that he intends to run for president once again.

[Kerry is preparing to attack them with a whiffle ball.]

In response to wide talk of Sen. Clinton (D-NY) being the favorite for the Democrats in 2008, Kerry says, "I don’t buy it. ... I don’t care what the dominant, conventional wisdom is today; it will not be the dominant, conventional wisdom in a year."

[When Kerry finally realizes that the 2008 nomination WON'T be his, the implosion will be incredible to behold.]

RAWSTORY

I like his attitude. I hope he backs it up with action.

[You mean like that thumb stuck in his mouth action of 2004 when the Swift Boat Vets confronted him in the commercials?]

where the hell was he when he ran last time and won??? He walked away and let bush have the presidency.I was sick and depressed for months.I campaigned for him and John Edwards and when he walked away with out a fight I was devastated!!!!!

[Have a hit from Susan Estrich's 2004 champagne victory bottle.]

Exactly. Should we believe him, this time around?

[Lucy requests that you kick her football just one more time.]

I gave more money thn all my previous donations together, campaigned for him in 2 states.It was his to lose and he lost it. We can blame other people but if he had put up a good fight he would have won. Not Him! Not Hilary! Someone without baggage that wants to put up a fight (Clark? Feingold?)

[(Kucinich? Sharpton?)]

How I wish he'd been prepared to kick "Swiftboat" ass in 2004.... How different life now might be. Go Clark, Edwards, Warner, Richardson, Gore, and anyone else who might chose to run and the FIGHT when they are F*CKED. Too bad John learned his lesson a few years too late.

[FIGHT when they are F*CKED? Great upbeat campaign slogan there.]

Trust me on this, you're not wrong.....Kerry won't get a second chance to f*ck up. Democrats want to win and he really doesn't have what it takes. I think John Kerry makes a pretty decent senator from Massachusetts (other than his pro-war votes) but thats pretty much stretching his limits to the max. He's not presidential material. He let bottom feeding scum suckers (ie the "swiftboaters") derail him in 2004 with little or no protest. Then he let Ohio be stolen with no protest. This is not the person I want representing my party in 2008. It's time to fight back and Kerry apparently doesn't know how.

[Oh pretty please! Give me a second chance to mess up again!]

He folded quicker than Superman on laundry day. It boggles the mind people still support him and want him to run again. What the proverb about doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome?

[Dan Rather could probably come up with a fake folksy Texas proverb. He will fax it to you from a Kinko's complete with proportional spacing and superscript.]

I'm pretty certain it was Albert Einstein.... "Insanity: the belief that one can get different results by doing the same thing."

[Like kicking Lucy's football over and over and over again.]

JOHN KERRY IS A SHILL. Kerry's job was to lose the election. That's why he never defended himself against the bullshit Swiftboat rubbish. That's why he conceded election night. That's why he never fought to ensure there was a clean vote. Bush is Skull and Bones. Kerry is Skull and Bones. Research the group. That is their one and only loyalty. Not to any party or, heaven forbid, the people of the United States.

[Kerry was Karl Rove's sleeper agent. When shown the Red Queen, he folded up and went into the fetal position.]

What I find frustrating is that the conspiracy theorists who propose wacky theories like this do a lot of damage to legitimate causes, like voting fraud.

[Or maybe they think your wacky election fraud conspiracy theory is harming their legitimate cause, like the Skull & Bones theory.]

So what do you make of his concession on election night? I mean, if he genuinely wanted a fair count, why give up at the start?

[Because that way he could get back to the Davos ski slopes that much quicker.]

He didn't concede on election night! It the following day, and the facts about his actions thereafter are posted.

[True. Kerry wanted to get a good night's sleep so he could be nice and fresh when he conceded.]

Poor John. He brings to mind the good ol school daze... going home after being picked on and thinking up the perfect come-back a day or 2 later.

[In John's case, a year or 2 later.]

Sorry, but John Kerry has been tagged as a Flip-Flopper and I think rightly so. It's a little too late to fire back at the Swift Boaters now.

[John Kerry flipped before he flopped.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2008election; antiveteran; asskicking; brownshirtsforkerry; dummies; election2008; howtostealanelection; johnkerry; kerry2008; swiftboats
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To: PJ-Comix
Cool, Can I get an autographed edition when it comes out?


21 posted on 09/15/2006 6:14:39 PM PDT by darkwing104 (Let's get dangerous)
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To: PJ-Comix
TT!

L

22 posted on 09/15/2006 6:15:53 PM PDT by Lurker (islam is not a religion. It's the new face of Fascism in our time and we ignore it at our peril.)
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To: Chickenhawk Warmonger

Sorry. I just checked on Publish America. No go for me that's for sure. 'Nuff said.


23 posted on 09/15/2006 6:18:02 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: darkwing104

Sure. No problem. BTW, are there by any chance any Regnery VPs on my VAST PING list?


24 posted on 09/15/2006 6:19:16 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

"Je m'appelle Monsiuer Douche Bag"
25 posted on 09/15/2006 6:20:57 PM PDT by NewLand (Always Remember September 11, 2001)
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To: PJ-Comix
John Kerry makes a pretty decent senator (not!) from Massachusetts (other than his pro-war votes) but thats pretty much stretching his limits to the max.

It's time to fight back and Kerry apparently doesn't know how.

Sorry, but John Kerry has been tagged as a Flip-Flopper and I think rightly so.


DUmmies are the slowest, dumbest most naive beings on the planet. Hey DUmmies the rest of US figured all of this out over 3 years ago!
26 posted on 09/15/2006 6:22:34 PM PDT by socialismisinsidious ( The socialist income tax system turns US citizens into beggars or quitters!)
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To: PJ-Comix
"This sounds extreme but I would even be willing to undergo carnal relations with Playboy Playmate, Petra Verkaik, if that is what it takes to get the book published."

How about if it has to be with THIS guy?

Be honest now...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

27 posted on 09/15/2006 6:24:25 PM PDT by decal (See gas prices drop! See Dems howl! Howl, Dems, howl! Howl,howl,howl!)
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To: PJ-Comix
"I like his attitude. I hope he backs it up with action.

[You mean like that thumb stuck in his mouth action of 2004 when the Swift Boat Vets confronted him in the commercials?]


Uh, Peej? That wasn't his mouth it was stuck in...
28 posted on 09/15/2006 6:26:22 PM PDT by decal (See gas prices drop! See Dems howl! Howl, Dems, howl! Howl,howl,howl!)
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To: NewLand

ROFL!


29 posted on 09/15/2006 6:27:24 PM PDT by darkangel82 (Higher visibility leads to greater zottability.)
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To: PJ-Comix

He'll do it like this,
He'll do it like that,
He'll do it with a wiffle ball bat!


30 posted on 09/15/2006 6:27:37 PM PDT by Panzerlied ("We shall never surrender!")
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To: decal

I'm thinking. I'm thinking. I'm THAT desperate right now. It's KILLING me to KNOW that a DUFU book would be a hit seller but I have to first convince a publishing company to publish it. Maybe I should do some sample chapters and post to the web?


31 posted on 09/15/2006 6:27:45 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: decal

Wow, thats from AustinExperience.com? Ya know, I think I'll pass on venturing to that part of Texas, thanks.


32 posted on 09/15/2006 6:36:19 PM PDT by GOP_Raider (Would you like to join the OFFICIAL Oakland Raiders ping list? Sure you would, send me freepmail.)
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To: GOP_Raider
That is "Leslie" - the local village idiot; hangs out at 6th and Congress.

Came in second in a mayoral race a few years back, which is all you need to know about Austin...
33 posted on 09/15/2006 6:38:59 PM PDT by decal (See gas prices drop! See Dems howl! Howl, Dems, howl! Howl,howl,howl!)
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To: PJ-Comix; LonePalm

Seems like a good time to revive the Wreck of the John F'n Kerry.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1110369/posts


34 posted on 09/15/2006 6:39:56 PM PDT by cripplecreek (If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?)
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To: PJ-Comix
"Unfortunately for Kerry, even most of the DUmmies aren't buying into Kerry's false bravado."

Hmm, someone else has suddenly fallen out of DU's good graces - trying to remember...

Oh, YEAH!

Oh, Mr Pi-i-i-i-i-i-tt! sounds like the Senator's looking for someone to run his campaign committee!
35 posted on 09/15/2006 6:44:10 PM PDT by decal (See gas prices drop! See Dems howl! Howl, Dems, howl! Howl,howl,howl!)
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To: PJ-Comix
Great one, PJ.

The reason you can't publish that book, is because no one takes you seriously. But if they took you seriously, you wouldn't be funny anymore.

Life jus' tain't fair.
36 posted on 09/15/2006 6:49:13 PM PDT by F.J. Mitchell (The devil himself is less of a demon, than the devout and peace loving Islamofaciest who serve him.)
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To: PJ-Comix
"I’m prepared to kick their ass from one end of America to the other,"

What Kerry is really doing, referring to the DU crowd:

"I’m prepared to kiss their ass from one end of America to the other,"

37 posted on 09/15/2006 6:51:57 PM PDT by mikrofon (Perhaps a Swift kiss in the *ss)
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To: F.J. Mitchell

Hello? Has Regnery come thru with a book offer yet? No? Okay, back into hibernation.


38 posted on 09/15/2006 6:57:49 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
where the hell was he when he ran last time and won???

Only a moonbat could lose by over, what was it, 4 million votes; and still call it a win.

39 posted on 09/15/2006 7:10:24 PM PDT by beckysueb (KOmmies are really nothing but DUmmies with better PR.)
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To: PJ-Comix
That's why he conceded election night.

Maybe he conceded because he lost and he knew it. It used to be the right thing to do before Albore tried to steal the election and almost suceeded.

40 posted on 09/15/2006 7:16:28 PM PDT by beckysueb (KOmmies are really nothing but DUmmies with better PR.)
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