DUmmie FUnnies 07-17-06 ("new du group- former gifted children?")

DUmmie FUnnies ^ | July 17, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

[PJ-Comix]

I remember a high school class where we were asked to write an essay about whether we were a conformist or a non-conformist. Of course, everyone wrote that they were non-conformist except for ME. I figured that if you are a TRUE non-conformist you would go against the crowd and actually proclaim yourself a conformist PLUS I also figured out that we have to act as conformists in at least 95% of what we do in order to function in society. For example, speaking a common language, abiding by traffic regulations to avoid accidents, getting vaccinated, etc.. Of course, my essay stood out from the rest of the other essays of the "non-conformists" proclaiming themselves to be non-conformists. Likewise we now have the DUmmies proudly asserting that they were all young geniuses in this THREAD titled, "new du group- former gifted children?" Yes, DUmmies, you are all just too good to be true...in your own minds. So let us now watch the DUmmies engage in an orgy of self-congratulation in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who learned to speak by the age of nine, is in the [brackets]:

new du group- former gifted children?

[new du group- current braggarts?]

i know there are lots and lots folks at du who are what the pinheads call gifted and talented. at the risk of sounding like a braggart, i am, at the age of 51, finally realizing that my membership in this group has kinda screwed up my life. living among "normal" people (no offense intended) can be extremely difficult. most of us wish we were just normal folks. most of us deny our gifts, and consequently make a lot of bad decisions in life. gifted and successful go together a lot less frequently than most folks would think. gifted and miserable, or troubled, probably outweighs that by a lot. i think it would be great if there was a du group where we could hang out with our peers. anybody?

[strange how this "gifted" dummie never learned learned the rules of capitalization.]

Agreed. The world rewards superficially affable mediocrities -- the more well-connected, the better, of course -- over those who see and speak clearly...and it infuriates me. Always has, always will.

[We're just too good to be true.]

I can remember being told I was "gifted". I can remember being told that teh sky was teh limit. It was all a lie because society today no longer rewards the genius (I say that without any trace of snobbery, it's simply a description), it no longer rewards the free-thinker or teh maverick, it rewards the mediocre, the safe and dependable. You have to put up with being resented your whole life, called an "elitist" because you don't think the world should be run by mediocrities dumber than a box of rocks and as a child, you get physically attacked too.

[I can't help it...I'm a friggin' GENIUS!]

Often, we have problems with personal relationships as well. We often end up with minor mental illnesses (depression most often) too. Theories vary as to why but the most common one is that our minds are set up for analytical thought and therefore, we have problems with the irrationality of emotion (my own theory is that this is why so many of us end up in computing or hard sciences. If something goes wrong, it's not because teh PC doesn't like you or resents your intellect or is having a bad day, it's because you got something wrong and you can go through and fix it).

[MINOR mental illnesses?]

There was a time, when my own depression was at it's worst (I was unmedicated at the time which didn't help) when I wept and wailed and would have given absolutely anything to be "normal". To be happy with the small life of the masses, to believe what I was told, to not see the complexity of everything.

["Please make me stupid like the normal people!"]

I too was a "gifted" kid, and the hardest part for me is that real life has matched up to the endless possibilities I was told would be open to me because of my intellect. I think it is very common for people who work with gifted children to present this idea that gifted kids are guaranteed success, and it can be kind of a rude awakening to discover that being gifted doesn't give a person any more opportunities than anyone else. Sometimes being gifted can even be a disadvantage because, as you said, society rewards the mediocre. Being very intelligent just makes a person appear strange or like an outcast or misfit.

[Nice try. You are a misfit and an outcast so you blame it on the fact that you THINK you are a genius.]

In many ways I see gifted education as a form of special education, because gifted kids aren't able to fit in with mainstream kids in many cases and they need different education taught at a different pace. There have honestly been many times I wished that I were just average, and I didn't wish for my kids to be gifted. It seems like life looks a lot easier when you don't have the inclination to analyze or question everything.

[This looks like a common theme in DUmmieland. A bunch of socially maladjusted misfits who blame their creepiness on the fact that they THINK they are geniuses.]

When you clear away all the BS, American culture is very anti-intellectual, and very punishing of people who are different. Sports is an acceptable means of standing out —- it’s terrific if you are a star at basketball or football —- but gods forbid you should mention excelling in calculus or English class.

[Then the jocks promise not to beat you up if you let them cheat off you in class.]

You are absolutely right about how American society not only doesn't value intellectual ability, but it distrusts it and discourages it. There is a strong and growing anti-intellectual attitude in this country. Just look at the 2004 elections and why people said they voted for Bush - they would prefer a guy they'd like to have a beer with than someone they considered "too smart" like Kerry.

[Too bad for your theory that Bush scored HIGHER than Kerry in a military INTELLIGENCE test required for officers.]

My beautimous and bright daughter, "Kaghime", was in G&T classes from 1st - 3rd grades. It was quite the experience and thankfully, at the time, there were progressive thinking folks in the schools of Colorado (mid-80's). Unfortunately the program was axed when she hit mid-3rd. However, she continues to be very gifted and talented, IMNSHO.

[You're such a genius for naming you beautimous daughter, "Kaghime."]

i went to lutheran schools my whole life- and there was no effort made to seek out nor accomodate "gifted" students- after all, god loves everyone equally, right...? had i been in public schools, i would most likely have been skipped ahead- instead i was pretty much told to "hold back" to be fair to the other kids.

[A DUmmie blames the Lutherans for being a misfit.]

I am now a classic underacheiver who has struggeled with depression and substance abuse issues for most of my adult life. I do ok - have a decent job, etc. but I deeply unsatisfied with my life. I feel like I think everything through too much and come up with the notion that most of what goes on in daily life is just pointless. I think part of that is depression, but I believe my thinking is what gets me depressed in the first place.

[Thinking about what a nerd you are is what gets you depressed in the first place.]

It would be interesting to read this group though I am not quite sure what kinds of people you would get.

[I'll let the next DUmmie who wins a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity answer that question...]

Lots of smug superiority, methinks. So it WOULD be interesting to read.

[And FUnnie!]

lots of jealous, insecure, mean spirited onlookers i suppose. just like life.

[lots of entertained onlookers.]

i was also a very gifted child. i would like to be part of this group

[if you are a dummie with warm blood flowing through your veins and have a false sense of smug superiority hiding the fact that you are an awkward maladjusted creep, you qualify as a former gifted kid despite the fact that you can't capitalize.]

Being in the "Gifted Program" in grade school only got me shunned, beat up and recess deprived by the same type of people who are running our country now. Being in that same program in Jr. High made me an outcast and a nerd. By the time I was in high school, I had given up on academics and just did enough to get by. I was grateful to get to college and realize that everyone was "gifted" in one way or another. I am not so sure that being branded as "Gifted" when you are nine years old does one any good.

[WAAAAHHHH!!! George Bush beat me up for being "gifted!"]

I was in a g/t program in grade school. One of my grade school teachers gave my parents advise AGAINST me joining this program but we went ahead with it. I had to change schools, make new friends - mainly new friends who were a lot more 'book smart' than I was. It did nothing for my self esteem. In fact, I think it destroyed my self confidence. The expectations were high. I could never live up to them. I could talk an owl out of tree when it came to current events and politics at a very young age. I had zero interest in learning anything about science or math. Even those branded as gifted have different gifts. I felt like a failure. I never measured up. It took me years to get over this...I don't know if I really ever have.

[You are correct. You never did get over the fact that you are a socially maladjusted NERD.]

I know as a child I imagined myself as being an alien from an advanced society who was implanted in my human mother.

[An alien from the Planet Cretin.]

In the first grade, in 1949, I had a teacher who was outraged that I could read; that I "read ahead" in Dick and Jane and finished in ten minutes what she had planned for a whole week's reading aloud experience. Her response was to isolate and humiliate me in front of the whole class.

[She must have been an EVIL Republican.]

When I was four years old I marched into the local library and asked the Librarian to give me the hardest book you could ever read, because I was smart and could read Anything.. and I was dead serious, I'd been reading at High School level or higher at age 4.. She gave me Kant, philosophy.. smart lady.. but I realized that while I could read the WORDS that the concepts were meaningless to me as a child, so I put the book back on the shelf and vowed to have many life experiences so that everything in that philosophy book would ring true when I was older, and I knew I'd have to be much older to completely comprehend Kant and others (my younger brother's middle name is Durant, after Will Durant, my father's favorite philosopher)..

[Too bad the librarian didn't give you a book by Whittaker Chambers.]

had four scholastic scholarships and a 136 IQ and lost it all first semester in college to go completely wild. and i still once in a while fight the resentment that my parents or anybody did not step in to see what the hell was going on with me.

[A DUmmie is angry at OTHERS for not keeping him from acting like a jerk.]

Yeah I could use a group like this. Giftedness f*cked me over bigtime.It lead to alot of the abuse I went through growing up.It is so very hard to relate to people when they do not understand. It sure had a way of alienating me from day 1. I could use a group like this,alot.Please DU add it,and I'll join it!

[Please DU, add a group of fellow misfits who also conveniently blame their failures and social awkwardness on being "gifted."]

[zlala]

But can your hubby spell "beatimous?"

Only because now it will become a FR word to mock. As it should be.

[Democracy In Iraq]

society today no longer rewards the genius (I say that without any trace of snobbery, it's simply a description)


D. U. Coyote, super genius!

[Not A Snowbird]

lost it all first semester in college to go completely wild. and i still once in a while fight the resentment that my parents ... did not step in to see what the hell was going on with me.

And if they had, DUmmie, you would have screamed that you were 18 now and to get the heck out of your business.

What losers. I too was a gifted child. I was also extremely messed up, but it had more to do with an abusive childhood than what math class I was in. Some of us, dear DUmmies, rise above our beginnings to be productive citizens. Others of us, apparently, sit in a corner sucking our thumbs and blaming our 2nd grade teachers for everything that's wrong with our lives.

[Ditter]

These people aren't "gifted" they are "special"!
What a bunch of loosers!

Fanny packs are OK PeaJay, a little faggy but still OK. Just promise you won't wear your sun glasses on your head and a sweater draped around your shoulders. K?

[cripplecreek]

I've been thinking. These people remind me of the false soldiers who brag about military service they did with non existent special forces teams. Some how I doubt there are many Mensa memberships among these baby geniuses.

The most intelligent people I've ever known didn't sit around bragging about their intelligence. They lived their lives interacting with "normal" people as equals. They earned their respect like the rest of us and showed their intelligence through wise actions.

[MichiganConservative]

Theories vary as to why but the most common one is that our minds are set up for analytical thought and therefore, we have problems with the irrationality of emotion...

This has to be one of the bigger delusions. All these people have are emotions. Their "arguments" basically boil down to "I have thought about this a long time. I hate Repukes because they're mean. I don't really know any Repukes myself, but I feel they're sexist, homophobic, racist, prejudiced bigots who hate, hate, hate and generalize everyone, as they have no grasp of nuance or subtlety."

[SoothingDave]

Okay, I am no longer wearing a Fanny Pack. I am now wearing a Handy Pack. Same thing but with a new name and, hopefully, more manly image. In any event, I can't live without my Handy Pack. Too much convenient stuff I can pack away in there.

Unless there's a roller coaster in the vicinity, there is no excuse for wearing a fanny pack. Might as well get a murse. ;-)

SD

[kevkrom]

What really drives me nuts are guys carrying babys in the backback on the front. What do you call them things? I hate when I see that.

Hey, when you've got a young kid and you need both hands free, you do what you have to.

[techcor]

I know as a child I imagined myself as being an alien from an advanced society who was implanted in my human mother.

Underground panther? God what a bunch of ego maniacs.

[SCALEMAN]

I still would like for someone out there to tell me how I can stow a knife, pens, sunglasses, cell phone, radio, batteries, and LOTS of other stuff in mere pockets? Yeah you can probably do it but only with dopey looking bulges. Sorry, but Handy Packs (my new term for Fanny Packs) are, well, handy.

Knife?... I carry a small single blade pocket knife in my pocket.
Pens? ... more than one in overkill.. actually one is overkill
Cell Phone ... clipped to my belt
Radio?... don't have the need.... there's one in my vehicle
Batteries? .... no need if I don't need a radio
Sunglasses... usually on my face

Solution... simplify

[Calusa]

The catholics were pimps

Catholic: Ouch!! Where that come from? The only thing that saved me from my own craziness was my faith and upbringing. Maybe the DUmmies should take Hillary's and Nancy's marching orders seriously and study the Scripture.

[Blue Jays]

Hi All-

Sorry for the minor thread drift...presenting the best Handy Pack in the world, the versatile Maxpedition Proteus:

~ Blue Jays ~

[PJ-Comix]

Do they have a version that fit on the FRONT. I would hate to reach back for something plus they would be uncomfortable when sitting down.

[faq]

PJ, you're a comedic genius!

I've always thought a more politically correct and accurate term for DUmmies is calling them "eccentric".

As far as the handy pack goes, I think they fine in Florida. With the tourists and beach goers, they won't look out of place. I've worn them myself. They are handy for carrying a knife, bone saw, deer drag, gutting gloves, compass, tobacco, extra shells, etc. I usually wear mine deer hunting.

[Luircin]

First, Peej, I agree with you about the Handy Pack (and wish I'd come up with that name), though I usually had mine to one side instead of in front or behind. I took mine all over the British Isles and Australia. Extremely convenient, especially in places where a backpack couldn't go (IE: almost everywhere).

Second, I hope this doesn't make me sound like a DUmmie.

I was the stereotypical "gifted" kid in my school days. Kept to myself, read all the time, had the absolute weirdest imagination (Alien implantation? Please. Try wings, claws, teeth, and tail), and was mercilessly tormented by most of the rest of the student body. Mostly because I had a temper and it was probably fun for them, but I digress...

I didn't keep myself separate because I thought I was better than anyone else, mind. Or at least I hope that was the case; it's sort of a blur now, Just that I just didn't see what was so wonderful about running around pretending to be the Power Rangers, etc. My parents wanted me to skip a grade, but considering that we were in a tiny little Iowa school, it wasn't as easy to do. In retrospect, however, it was better that I stayed where I was. I was intellectually prepared to go higher, but most definitely not emotionally prepared.

Once I hit college, it was like being hit by a train. I couldn't coast through getting straight As anymore, and I actually had to work. (Well, at least in the "crunchy" classes, as opposed to the wealth of fluff courses that permeate higher education today) I suppose that I could have given up, but I guess I was too spoiled by my high grades to accept anything less and too proud to try to cheat.

Third, I think the reason that most of the "gifted" DUmmies (Assuming they aren't lying, just like they do about... everything else) turned into whiny libs is that they've always been taught that the world owes them a living. Both from what the teachers tell them and from the fact that grade-school education is a breeze. Then when things aren't handed to them on a silver platter in real life and they're not mature enough to accept that maybe the world doesn't revolve around them, they start coming up with this "society rewards mediocrity" nonsense and let the echo chamber of like-minded people turn them into DUmmies.

[PJ-Comix]

Fanny packs are OK PeaJay, a little faggy but still OK. Just promise you won't wear your sun glasses on your head and a sweater draped around your shoulders. K?

Okay. I never wear a sweater draped around my shoulders. But are Handy Packs any more faggy than wearing Speedos? That probably killed Kerry in the Buckeye State.

[freedomlover]

LOL on the fanny pack.
I call mine the gut pack.
If you try to take it off me I will have to reach into the double-secret biggest pocket in the back for my AirLite.

[PJ-Comix]

The faggiest sport ever is Power Walking. Everyone thinks the Dukakis Snoopy Helmet Tank Ride killed his campaign. In truth his campaign really started going downhill weeks earlier when a video of him Power Walking was broadcast. There was Dukakis like a complete nerd with his arms swinging back and forth high into the air while holding weights and taking long exaggerated Power Walking steps. Totally laughable and totally nerdy.

[beezdotcom]

I still would like for someone out there to tell me how I can stow a knife, pens, sunglasses, cell phone, radio, batteries, and LOTS of other stuff in mere pockets?

Simple answer - don't. Real men don't need all that stuff. :)

[Paradox]

This thread is truly RICH! It gives an excellent insight into the mind of a DUmmie. Basically it boils down to this "I'm a LOOSER, but its not MY fault, its everyone else's fault, they hait smart peeple"

Wow! This is great!

I was in the "gifted" program, as were most of my high school friends. One is now a world class researcher, and I would not be surprised to see him win a Nobel some day, the other is a successful physician, the other is a rich guy livin and lovin life. The rest of them are doing pretty darn good, I'd say I'm the underachiever of the group, and I'm doin pretty well.

Funny, most of my friends also turned out to be pretty conservative. I guess maybe we really weren't all that smart at all. How we snuck into the program, I'll never know, I guess it was our wealthy parents who bought off the teachers, yeah, thats it.