Posted on 06/09/2006 5:23:04 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
"Glad Zarqawi's Gone? Yes or No" seems like a pretty straightforward question but, as we shall see, a "Yes" answer in DUmmieland doesn't really mean a straight "Yes." The "Yes" in DUmmieland is frequently followed by a "But" so that the DUmmies qualify as what Laura Ingraham calls "But Monkeys." In fact there are FEW simple YES answers in DUmmieland which are not followed by numerous caveats by the But Monkeys. So let us now explore the Land of the But Monkeys with their "Yes...but" caveats in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that the first of Laura Ingraham's But Monkeys yesterday commenting on Al-Zarqawi's death was Joe Biden talking out of both sides of his mouth as usual, is in the [brackets]:
Glad Zarqawi's Gone? Yes or No
[Yes...but.]
This is NOT a DU poll which will allow voters to hide. Bottom line, I want to prove that a large percentage of DUers are glad Zarqawi is no longer on the planet. DUers who are glad Zarqawi's gone please indicate by a simple "yes". The "unglad" indicate with a "no". Please,for the purpose of this experiment, no opinions, just vote yes or no.
[It's not that simple in DUmmieland. Any "Yes" answer NEEDS to be followed by a "But" or some other caveat.]
You are wrong. The answer can not be a "yes" or a "no" because neither answer means anything. I know in your mind it means something, but to anyone that thinks about it for more than a knee jerk split second, you realize that the question is completely pointless.
"Yes, I'm glad" means you are glad we started this war and killed so many people in the bloody pursuit of Osama, Saddam, Zarqawi, (whomever is next).
"No, I'm not glad" seems to mean one is rooting for the official enemy, but does it really mean that? Or does it simply mean that your not glad we are involved in this illegal war in the first place, and they have no other option to say that other than "No."?
Who friggin' knows, because the question is so stupid to begin with.
[One way to avoid becoming a But Monkey is REFUSING to answer the question in the first place.]
Yes, but disgusted that we used an airstrike to kill one man.
[And DUmmie KyuzoGator becomes the FIRST But Monkey on this thread!]
Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.
[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]
Yes. Glad that he's out of action, but not glad about his death.
[Apparently DUmmie But Monkeys like dining on angst over the death of this murderous thug.]
No. We knew where he was, we should have taken him into custody and hauled him before the court. We used to be a nation based on LAW, now we are the wild west and killing for expediency rahter than worrying about the mess of prosecution...
[No Buts about this No. This DUmmie wished we had frogwalked Zarqawi from his safe house into the arms of waiting lawyers.]
If he really is dead, yes. But I am not ready to believe the story.
[And another But Monkey hops into the tree.]
we had the ability to take him alive and should have done so. We could've learned a lot more that way, as long as we didn't torture him because that would be wrong too.
[And it would have been really really wrong to torture him with air conditioning set at a freezing 68 degrees like we do to the Gitmo detainees.]
Yes, but still have questions about the official story.
[The official story is that you are now a But Monkey. Now go grab a banana and hop into the tree.]
The purpose of this exercise is to get a more accurate indicator of where DU stands on Zarqawi's demise. We're getting visitors to this website who are posting claims contrary to the results we're getting so far.
[Wrong. I am a visiting Zoologist to your site merely cataloging your large collection of But Monkeys.]
Yes, but it won't make any difference
[Is that you, Joe Biden?]
Glad he's gone, but a trial would have been a lot more effective.
[Another overly legalistic But Monkey. Up into the tree for you, feller.]
Not crying any tears for him, but just like when they killed Pablo Escobar, will it change anything?
[Up into the tree, But Monkey, and enjoy La Cocaina.]
Makes No Difference. If Bush thinks this will help his approval rating, it won't with me. Too much has happened. Even if they suddenly killed bin Laden it would make no difference. Bush has proven over & over again that he's a fascist. It's too late for him.
[And it's too late for you to play with the But Monkeys.]
Of course the mouth-breathing, blood-thirsty right wingers will consider this as a springboard to a midterm victory, and we will see this coverage trotted out daily, with generous doses of "Hooray for our side"..
[Too bad Zarqawi wasn't killed a couple of days earlier just before the California elections. That way the DUmmies would have provided us with ENORMOUS entertaiment with conspiracty theories about how the death of Zarqawi was really a Rovian plot to affect the outcome of those elections.]
Yes but I don't feel any safer and whatever happened to Bin 'forgotten' and bringing him in dead or alive.
[A banana for you and up into the But Monkey tree.]
Yes.... but it's not that straightforward... Well.. almost. I do wish they had captured him, instead of killed, because it's too easy to make him a martyr by killing him. I'd rather see him brought to justice in a less spectacular fashion. Showing photos of his dead body today, as with the bodies of Saddam's sons, makes me cringe because it's so much like what the insurgents have been doing to us... and the world has recoiled in horror because of it. If the choice of having him loose instead of killed, I'd choose killed... but I fear that his death like this will only fuel the hatred of us more and the insurgency against our troops. In a country, like the US, that does not deal in martyrdom, it's easy to believe that having him dead will somehow improve things, but in the radical fundamentalist circles over in the Middle East, death is an honor and a reason for them to fight harder in his memory.
[And you need to go straightforward into the But Monkey tree.]
No. Give me a good reason why I should be glad.
[I won't even try.]
No would be my answer since morbidity is not my game. I never even knew the guy.
[Who knows? You could have even become pals with Al-Zarqawi and gone fishing with him.]
No. I don't condone killing, period. This was done in my name, with my money, which makes me complicit in something I find morally repugnant.
[Zarqawi, We Hardly Knew Ye.]
We get important visitors to our site and it would be a shame if they got the idea that a large percent of DUers somehow supported the Iraq insurgency. Freepers would love to create that idea.
[We get a lot of visitors to the DUmmie FUnnies and YOUR OWN WORDS give them the idea that the DUmmies need to be institutionalized.]
The blogosphere will know where DUers stand on Zarqawi. The results of this poll cannot be twisted by lurkers into supposed support for Zarqawi.
[The results of this poll will show that DUmmieland is full of But Monkeys.]
If I put the same question to Sen.Feingold, Boxer, Clinton, Kerry, Durbin, Byrd or Kennedy they would have no problem answering "yes".
[You mean "Yes...but" since they are But Monkeys.]
No. (Death is not punishment.) You have to actually be ALIVE to appreciate the fact that you're being punished. Once you're dead, you no longer care... you're dead!
[DUmmie illogic at its finest...and FUnniest.]
I am never happy when somebody dies. I don't care HOW "evil", or bad, or what a criminal, this guy was. I'm not going to cheer his death, when what we should have done, was get him ALIVE and put him on trial.
[I bet you would be OVERJOYED if any one of a large number of EVIL rightwingers dies. And NO TRIAL for them. STRAIGHT the guillotine!]
Neither yes or no.
[The Hamlet of DUmmieland forcefully speaks his mind.]
Glad??? HELL NO!!! Bushler&Co. royally f*cked up again, just for good PR. We should have CAPTURED him to get INFORMATION then publicly TRIED him for all of his crimes so the VICTIMS could have a chance to face him and scream bloody murder at him. Also, how many children were killed by the two 500 lb. bombs? More 'collateral damage' just so Bushler could get a bump in the polls?
[No But Monkey banana for you.]
No. Murder is never the answer to any problem. I'm a Buddhist.
[Is that you, Richard Gere?]
Yes, but I don't think it will make any difference as far as stopping the violence.
[Grab the banana and hop up into the But Monkey tree.]
If I have to pick, I'll say yes. He's a terrorist. But as I said on another thread, there will only be more Al-Zarqawis. If Bush didn't foolishly invade Iraq, it might be more meaningful.
[Take a meaningful banana and carry it into the But Monkey tree.]
Wouldn't it had been more fun to capture him alive and forced him to pose nude??
[A But Monkey of a different species replies.]
Sure, they can get Zarqawi, but they can't get "the tallest man in Afghanistan"?
/Hillary
>>It's like that saying: If you have to keep telling people you are _______, you probably aren't. <<
SO TRUE! I made this exact comment last night, watching the NBA Finals, when ABC came out with the commercial of Charlie Gibson, and the tagline was something like "We Are News You Can Trust."
Meaning, "Please trust us. We're not lying this time. Honest."
WoW sounds like Will was hittin it pretty hard last nite.
What about when you use spell check and still get it wrong? The bad thing is, I'm actually an excellent speller when I'm writing by hand.
Good one Charles! It reminds me of that sick cartoon of 2 Muslim women watching their children and lamenting to each other "They blow up so fast".
DUFU ping!
So tell him our squad commander tried to give the poor man a beer and a bite of his barbeque sandwich, but he was just too far gone....
I usually blame my misspellings on my "darned bifocals".
So DUmmies are all But Monkeys. Can we start referring to them as DUmb*sses now?
Cindie, I wonder if "Dan" knows about Pitt splashing his pic all over the internet. He did the same thing when he went to Pittsburgh.
Pitt comes off as a really lonely, needy guy; he's always going on DU with pix and stories of him in bars with strangers. (Is it just me or do the Boston bar-flies Pitt immortalizes on the net look like real bow-wows?)
His encounters with "Ty" and "Dan" are just Bouncy Ball stories, with Pitt, the Great Brain, leading them into the light.
He's boring. The Rove/Truthout blow-up finished him off. He'll stick around DU because that's his only world now. He'll be the resident Robespierre. He'll keep DUmmies "pure" that is, in line.
Sant-Just, Robespierre's ally, said "The Republic consists of exterminating its opponents."
That's Pitt's destiny...exterminating "opponents" of DU. He's the "Geek" in the movie "Nightmare Alley" the top act in the freak show who eats live chickens.
Sorry P.J., but this guy is bordering more on case study than comedy.
And the way Dems and DUmmies are--desperate for workers, low on morals, and short of memory--Will the Shill, the Useful Pundidiot, may have a few more of his nine cat-lives left in him.
I'm betting Dan "the dude" doesn't know if he truly doesn't have internet. Thus, one can never prove or disprove whether he's a member of the I-Was-Once-Blind-But-Thanks-To-Pitt-I-Now-See-the-Light fan club. A fan club that consists of an ever-dwindling number of adoring DUmmies and bar-flies. The future doesn't look bright for the boy wonder.
Sorry PJ I cant find the thread.
I think it was titled "They are watching us" or something similar. it was posted 6/8/06
Excellent....by the way, Zarqawi's last words before kicking the bucket were, "Bitch set me up"
Catching up, decal? C'mon and join us on the next DUFU:
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1646492/posts
This one is a major HOOT!
Thank you. :-)
Oh, PJ, you gotta do that one.
I love it when the ants look out the window! Those are my favorite DUFUS!
If there is a pool, put me down for August 4th for your thousandth pinglistee.
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